Especially Today....

  oday has been a hard day emotionally for me. Everytime I log on to EP, there are things waiting for me. I just go peeking in at stories & reading about lives & leave feeling more alone then I did when I came on.

   don't know why today is so hard. I have been talking back & forth with a few friends through the day. I am just so sad & wishing I had someone's arms around me tonight. I really don't want to go to bed alone tonight.

   miss the cuddling & whispers the most now that Shane is gone. The sex, I don't really miss, but the love, the hugs & the feeling that as long as his arms were around me I was safe.... That I miss. That's what I wish I still had. That's what I want again.

  ood night EP. I just can't deal with anything more. I'm sorry my friends, you all mean so much to me. Forgive me please & I will try to be a better friend tomorrow. :(


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3 Responses Mar 5, 2009

I would like someone to see about me and I see about him . we see about our kids.Who is seeing about us.I NEED someone to see about me I donot want a vaction with grand kids. I NEED SOMEONE TO HOLD ME. At 56 oct 6 I AM DONE SEE ABOUT ME ....

I understand you completely. I am in a loveless marriage. We sleep in separate rooms...have for 10 years now and I have a child with health problems so I can't leave at this point. I go to sleep every night longing for a lover's arms and then wake up feeling empty and sad. <br />
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What gets me through is faith that someday I will find what I am longing for. In the meantime, it's one day at a time and learning to love myself and knowing I have value even if my partner does not want me.<br />
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Hang in there...There is an old saying....The ball is round...Or better still what goes around comes around...It will get better...

Your feelings are VERY real, that is for sure. I am one who does know what it means to say to you ," I understand what you are felling". I feel this every night as I try to sleep and I f eel it the first thing when I do wake from the one or two hours of shut eye that I might get if I am lucky! It is the companionship and the real love that is left when the sex wears off that always remains, when two people truly are a match................but it was not meant to be. What kills me is that I go to my friends houses and they hate each other! It's like living Virginia Woolf! Please know that I am here for you if you need to talk!