Life Of Solitude

People tend to try and put down loners stating they are "weird" or "freaks". But I know plenty of weird and freaky people who aren't loners. There is nothing bad at all about being a loner. I'm one and have no problem what-so-ever with it. I take after my dad, who was truly one himself. He was a truck driver and it was understandable for him. But for me, I'm just 24 and prefer to be alone when I go out. I do things that others my age really could care less for. I'm not one to go out to clubs at night or go to a bar and drink the night away. Suprisingly, I simplify my nights to either driving around the city or sitting at the picnic table on a caboose, yes a real caboose, outside of a railyard watching all the trains coming in and out. I just love trains. If there is anyone I interact with, it's kids at the elementary school I plan to teach at. I volunteer my afternoons there for after-school care and the kids always want me to play with them. The music I listen to is rather odd seeing that I listen to all of it. I don't listen to rap like the others my age, well, old-school rap when rapping was rapping. But I love classical, r & b, soul, gospel, country, rock, you name it, I listen to it. It all depends on my mood. My way of life, I feel, sections me off from others. Whenever my younger brother invites friends over to our house, I leave. I'm not one to be in crowds. The movies, bowling, any recreation I do alone. I'm not saying that I won't play basketball with people or maybe go to a party, I just have be in the mood for it, which I rarely am. Bowling for example I take seriously trying highten my average. But with others, it's just time to play around, do crazy things, throw a ball down the lane when it's not your turn; that aggravates me. I don't have to worry any of that when I'm alone. I don't have to hear "please change that song" when I listen to the Beach Boys or Four Tops around others my age. I get to do what I want, when I want, without the depression caused by someone else on my back.  I keep a few close friends, about 3 or 4, mainly those I've known since preschool. Others, well, "hey, how you doing, good night." I can't say that I won't get married, I can't that I will, but hey, I'm only 24 giving me plenty of time to decide.
orangutang05 orangutang05
22-25, M
3 Responses Jul 8, 2011

I am a loner 2...and i use to thought tat i am not normal...i dun even keep pets...but i am extremely particular about cleanliness at alone give me a sense of peace which i could not get when others are around me...i have no regrets in my life...and i know tat if i were to die one day...i will look back my life without regrets...^^

I am much older than you and a woman - but I absolutely admire your attitude. I too, am a loner who prefers to avoid the trivial hassles of crowds and multiple friends. I've had many romantic relationships and intense friendships in the past, but I've always been comfortable in my own company and value my privacy to a greater degree than the average person. As I've grown older, I've found myself less and less tolerant of random people "in my way" and fear that I will soon become that cranky old lady who screams at kids to get off her lawn. I live alone and LOVE IT - I will not disclose how many cats I have (ha ha). I reluctantly participate in chit-chat with my co-workers - but just enough to keep me from being labeled a rude ***** or worse "not a team pla<x>yer". Continue nurturing the few friends you do have - they are getting the best of you whereas they would only get small doses of the good stuff if you had tons of friends to divide your time between tons of pals. Family is a no-brainer - they should be toward the top of your list even if they are irritating and/or don't "get you" most of the time. I would encourage you to remain as open as you can to varied interaction during your younger adult years - get lots of experience dealing with whackos and drama queens - it will help you to better identify them when you get to be a persnickety old codger :) Stick with your musical quirkiness - I can bang my head to my favorite speed metal bands from the 80's (Metallica, Megadeth, Anthrax) but I also love Morrissey, The Cure, The Beastie Boys, Lady Gaga, The Violent Femmes, Lil John and Dr. Dre. <br />
Most of all - know that you are not alone in your preference to be alone - you are OK.

There are a couple other terms for what you are.....confident, comfortable and mature. I am very much like you. I don't dislike people or anything like that, I just like to do things my way, and rather than burden others with "my way", I politely decline a lot of group activities. That doesn't mean I never do social things, but I only do them on my terms and in small doses. On the other hand some people NEED others to validate them, you're beyond that. Enjoy it!