I Am A Loser

I started this life with so much promise..... but that is all gone now.I am 32 a wife and mother and all of my successes are not mine. I am the woman
behind the man, the woman behind the kids but I have never acheived anything. I never graduated college, never got that great job,never did anything except get married at 20 and pop out a few kids ( who I adore). I went to trade school got a diploma and 20,000 dollars worth of debt and all I have  to show for it is a 20 hour a week dead end job, that has nothing to do with the trade I  learned. My husband is the success he went to college, went to war,has a great job and keeps our family afloat, i keep waiting for the day he realizes that all I am is an anchor and throws me overboard and replaces me with his equal. I see all of my friends online successful,rich and happy and we  still live at my moms because I can't find a job and we can't pay all of our bills plus rent on one salary (Thanks California!). My closest friend has a Masters degree a great job and enough money to travel the world, I don't have a clue why she is still friends with me. I usually try not to wallow in my own self pity but today I realized just how much of a loser I am.