Now A Looser Like Them

Since last year I have been struggling to make ends meet, in the process of getting through it,, I jumped from one wrong decision to another. ending up more miserable than the state I was in before.

Up until now... I'm still struggling.... people are now talking about me...

People who only know me in name. They tend to give sarcastic remarks such as - i constantly change jobs... when in reality it has been four years since the last time i did so...

They have created a perfect thought about me that i'm very hardworking that all I think about is money.... Silently they wait for me to fail.. and now that i'm in this mess i'm in, finally they found a dot at me that they can talk about.

When I was silent then, it doesnt mean that i'm seperating my self from them.... its just that i have to work really hard for everything.


i just wonder... When I was such a success they dont give a damn about me.... Now I'm down I seem to be the best talk of the town.

well.. while they are watching every move that I make now... I my self .. am also waiting for what I will do next....

guess I'll give them what they want for now... that i'm a big looser...





emikei emikei
26-30, F
2 Responses Feb 27, 2010

I know it's hard when you doubt where your decisions have brought you to. Other people's beliefs about you seem to infiltrate your own more at these times. See if you can remind yourself of your own positive attributes and know that tomorrow can be a different day again.<br />
Maybe EP friends can help bring you the confidence for your next decisions. <br />
I'm probably in a similar situation in that my decisions have brought me to a lesser place (if judged on current social values) but as uncomfortable as the tough times are, they are a great learning time and you can find out what you truly value.

sweetie - you are NOT a big loser - in today's world, I find, people need someone to talk about, gossip about, if it isn't you then it will be someone else. In a few weeks, you won't be the "hot topic" anymore, someone else will be - just give it time, hold your head up, be proud of what you've accomplished so far and keep on moving - that's all any of us can do right now. As far as I'm concerned if people are talking about me, they can't be hurting someone else right now. You can prove them all wrong - you just keep doing what you are doing with pride and your head held high.