Rant Time! Warning, Cussing, Sex, And Hatred.

     Alrighty then, for starters here's a question for everyone who likes pain; do you get pleasure from emotional pain? I've been with my guy lately and I love a lot of the physical pain that he gives me but then other stuff happens and I want to punch him in his stupid f*cking face. Sometimes it's awesome that he knows me so well that in an argument he can go straight for my heart it means that he understands a lot about me. Most of the time though I realize that most of the other people in my life would say that he's being horrible and I should leave him. Maybe that's true but at the same time he can make me so freakin happy. Do I stay with him because subconsciously I like the emotional f*cked-up-ness? That would total suck and basically doom me to unsuccessful relationships forever... Then again, this is my most successful one so far.
     So I'm kind of an angry person in the first place but this guy truelly knows how to bring all of me anger out. I usually hate arguing but sometimes I can't help it and I have to yell at him. Lots of things in life **** me off but this is the one thing that's supposed to be going right. Sometimes I want to quit but then I think about it and understand that it would be the stupidest thing I could do. Why would I end something that has the ability to make me so happy? I seriously hate relationships, sex, and people. I think maybe I'll just grab some torture tools and go be a hermit for the rest of my life and live alone in a cave; it's better than being hurt repeatedly.
     Oh. And one more thing that I really really hate... This stupid freakin' laptop keyboard. My hands are too big, that keys barely stick out, and my hand keeps moving the stupid touchpad so it moves the damn curser. This totally sucks and I don't think a backspace has ever been abused as much as this one is being right now. Oh, and sorry for the length of this and all the stupid questions, I'm just a really confused person.
Pariah123 Pariah123
18-21
May 5, 2012