Since I wrote when I was 19 a lot of stuff has changed. I practiced and the harder I practiced the less I had things came to me. It was practically nonexistent. I still had the feelings things were there and things were watching me but for the most part, I could completely erase these feelings and feel okay. I went through a really negative time, for about a year and was very weak in life. Meaning depressed and low. I dont know if that had to do with why things went away. That I was so weak things didnt want to bother me or that I was so weak that a stronger power was keeping things from me keeping me safe. I did have one experience that I can remember. I was laying by the heater, in my parents recently vacated home. They all moved 5 hours away and the house was really the only place I had to stay for about a week. There was no furniture in the house except for a mattress in the living room and a mat that I used for a pillow (like i said it was a very low time) It was freezing outside and inside, I was very depressed and weighed and unhealthy low amount. It was pretty much rock bottom. I remember I was laying by the heater listening to depressing music. I layed next to the heater and prayed. Prayed things would change, things would be different, I would be okay or I would just give up enough and die. I remember praying that if this was my end if I could just go and get it on with. I prayed until I fell asleep. I was so low I had completely given up. I remember my dream pretty vividly. I was walking around my empty house with the rest of the spirits that had been there since we moved in when I was in 5th grade (10years prior) No one said anything, no one did anything, we all kinda just lingered and walked around aimlessly. I dont know what it ment or where it was going but when I woke up I was in a half dream/awake state and something was crawling on me. I dont know what it was but new it was bad and new I woke up and the right time. I cant say that is what gave me the motivation to get up and pack up, get better and move on with my life but later that week I packed up and moved to the new city I am in now. Turned my life back in the right direction now living with my family again, full time in college and I have my mind in the right set now. I am strong again, so much stronger than before.

Which leads me to the update. Since I have found myself being stronger than ever i decided that my spiritual interaction was not so much a curse but a gift. So recently I have been trying to develop it more.

In my last story, I talked about a thing i do that my mom showed me called 'ghost writing.' I have been doing it here and there recently and have found out a lot about my house and who is here or how many people are in my house. I talked to a spirit and asked if they would talk to me in my dream. I thought it would be an easier way to communicate. I am a very vivid dreamer and have had other entities come to me in dreams and speak to me so i thought i would be able to handle it. I fell asleep on the couch and dreampt an almost awake dream. In my dream I saw myself laying asleep on the couch, I could feel what I felt in the dream but I could also feel myself looking at my body watching. The dreaming me heard so many voices it sound like a high school auditorium. Standing next to me, watching myself lay there was the person I spoke with while ghost writing. She just stood and watched myself dream with me. Inside the dreaming me I was screaming. I knew I was in my head but couldnt open my mouth to scream, It was like I was dream screaming. The dreaming me tried my hardest to wake up and move my body. I couldnt handle all the voices talking. There was too many. The me that was watching me dream tried to wake myself up by shaking me and when I did that I woke up. I woke up in a daze and new the lady was still standing there but my dreaming me and the watching me came together. I didnt know what to do, In a daze I went to my sisters room and fell asleep.

Theres just a story of something recent. I can feel theres things around me now. I will write again soon. If you know of similiar experiences or what I can to do to develop myself please post and let me know.

Have a good night--

nmmelendrez nmmelendrez
1 Response Sep 26, 2012

I never tried to develop it. In fact I prayed for it to go away after several instances where they pressed so hard for me to relay messages in very inappropriate situations. Like in the check out line at wal mart or at a teacher meeting. However I got depressed when I could no longer help people by connecting them with their help on the other side. Just pray about it. God knows what's best

I am not exactly a medium, I am an Empath, but knowing my stress with my Gift, I can only imagine what its like not only to feel their emotions but to see and hear the spirits. Must be stressful