Anyone Else Been Through This?

Okay so my boyfriend is in the marines. And he hasn't been home in 5 months now. Now all my friends are his friends. Which means they are all guys. Anyways I usually hug my friends and it's whatever. But I have been feeling like I need to spend more time with them and get hugs from them. I came to relize it's because they remind me of my boyfriend. Nothing happen other then rubbing one of my friends head cause he had a headache and I give my friends hugs. So I notice they made me think of my boyfriend and I spaced myself from them. Has this happend to anyone else?
brittywolf2011 brittywolf2011
18-21, F
2 Responses Sep 11, 2012

good advice thanks

Hey there! I have a lot of guy friends as well. It's kind of been a sore spot for my boyfriend and I. He's not used to girls having guys that are "just friends" so he always gets really protective or now that he's away he gets this sour look on his face if he finds out I had coffee with one of them or saw so and so in the library. I understand where he's coming from, his past relationship ended because of cheating, so I completely get why he's protective, but it's a learning process for both of us for sure. He's learning to trust me and that when I say I met a friend for lunch I literally mean a friend (only). But that being said...I haven't been hanging out with my guy friends as much, I think it's because I know it makes him uncomfortable, but a couple of them are in the military as well...so they remind me a lot of him and it can be really difficult to be normal with them some days cause like you said you want to to be with your boyfriend so bad, and you miss them so bad that you would do anything for their hugs! But your friend's hugs aren't his hugs...ya know? I would never cheat ever! (I'm sure you wouldn't either) but it's not healthy to transfer our need for comfort onto other people, especially not mutual friends that are guys, that's just a whole mess! So if it's too hard for you to hang out with them while he's gone than maybe it's a good idea that you have some space from them, there's nothing wrong with that at all. There's also nothing wrong with continuing to hang out with them as just friends too. Just do what you feel is right :)