New Army Girlfriend. How Do You Get Used To This Lifestyle?

My boyfriend got sworn into the Army in November. They told him that he would not be leaving for boot camp til May. Six months passed by like nothing and the day finally came to say goodbye to my boyfriend before he left for bootcamp for the next 3 1/2 months. I was devistated because I had never dealt with anything like this before. Because I had lived with him for so long, its like a whole new world now that he's gone. People keep telling me that this is the easy part of a whole new life as an army wife/girlfriend. I really don't know how to deal with this because it's foreign to me. Does anyone have advice for me?
katie91711 katie91711
18-21, F
5 Responses May 20, 2012

Hi! i am not married yet, but I am engaged to be married in a year. All you can do is stay busy. My fiance is a Marine and his boot camp is 3 months. The feeling when he comes home is amazing and i even cried the first two nights. I was so angry with him when he signed the papers I cried and didnt want to talk to him even though I knew of his full intentions and dedication to becoming a marine. Stay busy and write a letter everyday, spray it with perfume, and buy colored envelopes so at role call EVERYONE will KNOW which one is for your man. They used to pass my letters around the room so everyone could smell them. Decorate a box to put all the letters in. Or pick up some extra hours at work. Get a calander and count down the days till you see him again. And go out to lunch with his family, you all will have something in common to talk about, best of luck!

I know how you feel!! except when my husband got the call that he was being enlisted, he was sworn in the next day and he was flown out 3 days later. We went from living together for 3 years, having a son, and planning our wedding to him gone in less then a week. Its a major adjustment, that Im sure never gets easier. No matter if he is in basic training or deployed its still the same. You don't get to see him everyday like before. <br />
Just have to keep thinking that no matter how much you feel alone or scared or whatever, he will always feel exactly the same or more, so its important to always stay positive and support him.

I myself am engaged to a full-time Army soldier who is deployed at the moment. The last time I saw him was about 8 months ago, and he comes back this July, so it'll be over 9 months since I will have seen him, then my two boys and I are moving to be with him, this July also. And he recently informed me, through Skype, that when he does get home, he may have to leave AGAIN about 6 months later...I can honestly tell you, it's very difficult, and lonely and scary at times, especially in my situation, moving soon to a whole new state where I don't know a soul, no family, no friends, except for my fiance. But when it gets really rough, I remind myself that we love each other and really want to be together and make it work. He's really good with my sons, and they adore him, so I hope and pray it all works out. And I do know how painfully lonely it can be when they're gone, for SO long; not to mention the awful thoughts and insecurities that can often rear their ugly heads. We have to find ways to stay strong, and keep our relationship connections tight as much as possible, through social media and cellphones and such. Good luck with your situation. You're not alone, as you can see. ; )

Make sure you have a strong support group surrounding you. Family, friends, other military spouses, they will all make it a little easier to bear. One thing I do is keep a journal & I write to my spouse in it (even when he is home). I probably won't share it with him, but there is something comforting about putting everything I think & feel in ink. I take it with me everywhere & anytime I have a spare second or am feeling alone & overwhelmed, I tell him how I feel.

My fiance is in the Navy. And This never gets easier. They are out at sea right now.. and they leave on and off for a long time.... and she is missing our sons first birthday, christmas and thanks giving. even our two year anaversory! SO its hard girl!! But if you love him you have to stay strong, and supportive!! the ways it makes it easy to cope is KEEP YOUR SELF BUSY. if you work, take up more shifts or find a job.. or go to school i lived in NM and moved to washington to be with her.. i spent a week with her, then shes gone again so its me and my son in this appartment all alone.. and it sucks!! but im gettin a job and staring school to get my time busy so i dont have much time to thik about anything!if you need anything just write me or something not sure how this site works lol