Why Did You Become A Mother?

There are some people in this world who should never have children. Everyday we hear stories about children who have been neglected and beaten. Things like this infuriate me. It makes me want to ask "Why did you become a mother?" You are the one who chose to bring a child into this world. If all you are going to do is hurt them then why have them? I have a friend who can't have children. He is great with kids but he can't have any of his own. It hurts me to know that there are fathers out there who hurt or ignore there kids and someone who would really love and cherish children can't have any. There are mothers who do the same thing. I didn't make the conscience decision to have my first child. I would never  call him an accident. I like to refer to him as my favorite surprise. When I got pregnant everyone presented my options to me but I wanted to keep him. I wanted to raise my child. When I made that decision I changed my life. I left behind all my bad influences and habits. I knew that my life was no longer about me. It was about him. I chose to bring him into this world so I was determined to give him life he deserves. I haven't always made the right choices. I make mistakes, but I would never do something that I know would hurt my children. They are the innocent victims in lifes hardships. I try not to judge other people because I have been judged so much in my life. Still, there are some things that I just don't understand. I don't understand how a mother can posion their child's mind against their father for no other reason than they don't like them. I have a son with a man that I don't like. I married him during a four year period when my current husband and I were broken up. He is a very irresponsible and selfish man who cheated on me throughout our whole relationship. However, I would never tell my son any of that. He is 3 years old. He is too young to deal with anything like that. I choose to focus only on the good. I know that someday my son will be old enough to see his father for who he is. Then he can decide if he wants relationship with him. It is a decison that he deserves to make for himself. I am hoping that my ex will grow up and atleast be a good father to our son instead of letting his mom take care of him during his visitation. I don't worry about it though because I know my son has a good daddy. My husband has taken care of him since he was a year old. Never once has he referred to him as his "stepson". When my son calls for his daddy i know he is calling for my husband. I wish that all mothers could make the same choice about their ex. Unfortunately, they don't always. My father in law has a teenager daughter who hates him because of his ex. She has told so many lies to that poor girl and filled her with so much hate towards him that they never had a chance for a relationship. Their visits are tense and awkward for both. The girl is rude and disrespectful. I don;t blame her though. I blame her mother. Why can't she see that she is hurting her daughter more than she is hurting my father in law. What really makes me mad is that he is a good man. When he first got his visitation a year ago, he was excited abouy knowing his daughter. Now he knows he will never have the relationship he wanted to have with her. I know there are alot of women who do the same thing. They selfishly put they own feelings in front of their children's. I know another woman who has kids she doesn't seem to know how to take care of, I try to give some advice without judging but she never listens. I don't know if she doesn't care or if she really thinks she is doing the right thing. Her moods change ffrom one minuete to the next. When she is upset she hides leaving her kids on their own. I know how difficult this is for kids because as a teensger I had a mom who did the same thing. She would lock herself in her room leaveing my brother and I to do things on our own. Atleast we were teenagers though. This woman's kids are little. One is still a baby. A baby can't be left to take care of itself. It isn't possible. As a person I like her but as a mother she frustrates me. I have four kids. I know that it can be hard and  overwhelming. I also know that I can't let my problems get in they way of taking care of them. My mom always told me that no matter what I may be going through they still come first. This is another time when I bite my tongue rather than bringing up everytime her problems got in the way of taking care of me and my brother. I could write all day about examples like these but I think I have made my point.

purplehaze2202 purplehaze2202
26-30, F
1 Response Mar 11, 2010

Yes and writing is good for the soul