Mother of 4

 I LOVE MY CHILDREN DEEPLY,BUT AT TIME THEY ARE A HANDFUL TO DEAL WITH. IT ALWAYS SEEM I NEVER HAVE ANYTIME FOR MYSELF,IT MOM THIS OR THAT EVERY TWO MIN.SOMETIME  I LOOK FORWARD TO BED TIME,BUT EVEN THAT MY WORK IS NOT DONE....
VampiressSunrise VampiressSunrise
36-40, F
3 Responses Aug 16, 2007

I am a Mom. 3 Adult children (1 I gave up when I was 21), then 10 years between the last one who is currently 10 years old. total 4 children. My last one has heart and lung disease. I have worked nights, take care of him during the day. I finally went to school for a Pharm Tech. Got my license. I have no family near by. My friends disappeared when they realized how difficult my life became. I have become depressed, overweight, and stupid bucause I never can get help with my son. I have to do it all. Know I need to loose 80 lbs. because I have a condition called IIH with Mingraine headaches. Every 5 weeks they have to drain the extra fluid off my brain. So, the headaches wont be so bad. I dont know what to do. Cant leave the house. My son had major open heart surgry this year and he cant leave the housse. he is home schooled. I cant work. There is nothing no more. There is no more life. I am so tired of always sacrificying . I knew I would just never new it would be this much. I dont even know me anymore. I dont look in the mirror. I dont get dress. what for?? There is no where to go. I have no life. My life is useless... There's nothing to it. get up take care of the house and my son. and look at the walls. I almost dont care if I do the surgery on my spine to try and fix me. I dont want to be skinney. It still wont stop my husband from cheating on me. Funny how you always think you would never put up with things and then you always sacarafice for one reason or another.

sunriseangel...I felt much the same way, but I promise you, the time will come when you will have some freedom. And it isn't as far away as it seems. Hang on...try to give them what they need...try to trust that it's temporary and short-lived. Fill their truest needs now and they will need you less later.<br />
<br />
And they WILL need you less later. I'm not sure I believed it when mine were little like yours, but time passes faster than you realize when you're in it, and I know from personal experience that when the time arrives and they don't demand so much of you, the time in which they did will seem quite short.

Don't you love the way they need aomething as soon as you sit down. My two are 12 and 14 and I still look forward to bedtime. needy,needy,needy.