Can't Break The Habit

Being a "night owl" is a much different thing than living like a vampire, waking when the sun goes down -- it's terrible. I too used to do "catch-up" sleep. I've always been one to stay up late though. I'd wait until my Mom fell asleep in her chair then I'd sneak in to watch the Past Prime Playhouse horror movies on TV. Now, as an adult working from home, I can keep my own hours but I do so badly. There are times when my artist mind is reeling with ideas but there are more nights when I just sit there with bad TV and space out. I think I'm addicticted to the sleep-a-tonin or whatever chemical a brain releases with lack of sleep. Though I'm not one to have an addictive personality, I can't seem to kick the habit. Recently I kept "normal" hours for nearly 3 weeks & it was great around the house -- everyone was much more happy, I felt better, more creative & I got more work finished. But then a dire medical situation arose with a family member, putting me into an awkward position socially, so my anxiety disorder crap threw me for a loop. Now I'm making an effort to recover yet again. It's the only thing I can't seem to beat. If I get sad or freaked out I sleep as a defense but other than that I hate to go to sleep and hate waking up from sleep -- ahhhg! Hence the username "Dark Mist" :/

DarkMist DarkMist
31-35, F
3 Responses Feb 12, 2010

you'll never break the habit, you'll always feel crappy in the morning. you are hard wired that way. 24 hour people are daytime people, we run on a 27 hour day. you can't change it no matter how hard you try. my mother used to get very upset with me. she thought i was lazy because i'm so sluggish during the day. one day i made her reverse her schedule & it was awful for her. now she understands me much better & is more accepting. you are what you are.

Sounding like a know-it-all can often be mistaken for sharing correct info ;) -- no worries. I just need to add a playful touch to things that bother me and "sleep-a-tonin" is mildly humorous (mildly).

yes, i tend to draw at night also. the chemical you are talking about though (and i hate sounding like a know-it-all but it's in my nature) is melatonin. it can also be purchased in a tablet form. my mom used to make me take them so that i would get to sleep at night so that i wouldn't be tired at school lol. personally, my hours are roughly 12pm to 5am...