Not Convinced Its A Good Thing?

Ok so yes I am a people pleaser and I am not convinced its a good thing. I can't seem to help myself, so lately I have so much that I want to get done but just when I manage to get something done another five things seem to appear or five people want to be helped with something and it stresses me out however I can't seem to help myself but to help. 
Sometimes I am to kind for my own good or I feel guilty for not helping, I think some of it is a kind of perfection thing as well, but there in lies another problem. 
I want to do things so well that I fear failure so I just don't attempt things or I self sabotage. 
God sometimes Im a mess really.  Oh well I suppose its just one more thing for me to work on.
NewDay NewDay
31-35, F
5 Responses Nov 26, 2012

This can get out of hand fast and discretely. ...shame it does for Good reasons & Good Intentions but has the detrimental effects as mentioned by all here = Last couple years I began to realize and take account for my Funds I have made on the job....and realized I am NOT the majority take holder of my own money...and left with not very much to show for it....since alot of so-called-friends turn coat in some way or another after awhile. Just lately even a one of 10yrs over a so called bf that is in her eyes "Perfect". If ever was a love is blind situation, it'd be a perfect candidate >.>

But anyways...so last year when I crunched the numbers so to speak and took note of this aspect. I decided to get a Car for myself since I am accustomed and didn't care I not had one for my own. Riding a bike to work and around town I thought wasn't a big deal...still don't....but I decided to Force myself into getting a car for myself....one that would involve a good sum of money and years on purpose. 1.) as a forced reminder to myself to Back-off and not let it tip in a detrimental way again 2.) to make sure it's a effing lovely car xD ...so I got a Black 2013 Dodge Challenger - R/T *nods* Does the vroom-vroom thing rather nicely ~_^

It's a good thing n the world needs more people who care n try to help others - but - u have to draw a line at some point n take care of urself n ur needs too

Yes , you are right. Thank you for your comment

I'm the same way...I want everyone (especially family and friends) to be happy, so I tend to put myself on the back burner. It's something I'm working on....you have to realize it's hard to make others happy if you can't, or don't, make yourself happy :-)

That's very true amodelcitizen I feel like I let people down if I don't or cant do what they want problem is it puts so much pressure on myself I completely wig out eventually and lose the plot.

I hear you loud and clear. In addition to not getting our work done, we tend to not even finish what we promised our very close and dear ones. When it is the others they seem to get importance.

Welcome to my world, it's kind of a perfection thing but it's also a big heart thing. There are many times I've left this site because I spent so much time trying to help people here and in my home life it became overwhelming. It's not really a bad thing to be like this, it's just learning to manage it that's a bit tricky.

Thank you Dragonsteel for your comment, I understand what you are saying and appreciate you taking the time to read my story and offer your words. I do myself find it hard to manage it all so yes it is tricky. I hope that you have found a way to manage and still take care of yourself.