First Time Talking About It...I am new to this sight. I spent some time yesterday and this morning looking through posts and now am ready to tell my "story". It seems that many perfectionists are trying to figure out what lead them down this path, and that has had me thinking of my own struggles with perfectionism.
I can remember being in kindergarten and crying if I got anything wrong on my paper. Fast forward thirty years and I am still that little girl (although now in grad school) that can not stand getting anything wrong. I am an overachiever. Did something happen to me before this that made me feel that I needed to be perfect? Or are people born this way? One thing I am sure of is that this is not fun!
I am tired of the anxiety and sleepless nights thinking of all the mistakes I made or may have made that previous day. I am tired of stressing about everything I need to complete the following day to live up to unattainable requirements that I place on myself. I am my own worst critic.
I am a mother of four and a wife to an amazing man. I want to be a better role-model for my children. I do not want to place unrealistic expectations on them, or my husband. I want it to be ok to get a "B" in a grad course. I want it to be ok if my house is messy. How can it not be messy with four young children you ask? Unbearable amounts of stress and anxiety and lack of sleep.
I am a germaphobe.
I stress about school.
I stress about my children's school.
I stress about my health.
I stress about my family's health.
I stress about a messy house.
I stress if I don't feed my kids enough fruit. (No joke.)
I am NEVER late. (God forbid.)
I am overly concerned about hurting other people's feelings.
I HATE asking others for help.
Ok, that was cathartic. Please don't comment on spelling or grammatical errors (I have noticed many posts where people do that). Believe me, I have re-read this eight times and would like it to be "ok" to possibly have made a mistake. GASP