Sure Am! Kneel!
Im a prophet. I know alot of stuff you dont and want you to know it in small doeses so I can control you.
Every religion up to now has been wrong. Why? Because they didnt have scientific thought. Now with the addition of science, my will can be done.
When iw as a kid I used to have a pretty good insight into things, and I still do. I mentioend in 5th grade (before the fierst gulf war) that the Islamic natiosn were going to be a bad deal for us in the future, and WHOA! it came true. I also said that Russia would collpase out of communism. and that came true too. mostly. So you see, I have special powers that you can find in a book. So I satisfy the requirements for being a prophet. SO!
Why should you follow me? Well, Im pretty funny sometimes. I have no problem unsulting other people if its justified. I kow that what I believe is right, and if I find I have bad information in my brain noodle ethat makes me "think wrong" I upload the good info and change what i think. I only dogmatically think that free speech is good, that other religions than mine are stupid (and my religion is "me-ism"), I shamelessly promote capitalsim even though I'm poor, I am a strict individualist. I am the prophet that people need these days, some one that doesnt give a "flying **** at the mooooon" (Kurt Vonnegut quote for you litterary types) if I make some one mad as long as it can be backed up. I dont promote bullshibble. I want people to see throguh the smoke screens of modern preligious and political propaganda and enjopy MTY brand of propaganda as it is more enjoyable. Though less funded and less widespread. YES BELIEVE IN ME SHEEPLE!