Getting Healthy After Miscarriage

I am on a personal journey to get healthy - driven by a terrible loss that I recently suffered.

I miscarried about 3 weeks ago, at 20 weeks of pregnancy. We went to the U/S to check on the baby's health and find out if we were having a boy or girl (I didn't care, I just cared that out baby was healthy).... unfortunately learned that our baby did not have a heartbeat, and had passed away. Both my husband and I were heartbroken. Over the next two weeks i had to deal with the hormonal adjustments, my body shifting to the non-pregnant state, along with the loss, which was terrible. I then had to return to my normal life, but that life no longer included my baby. What exactly is "normal"? My body was certainly NOT "normal", but I also don't have labor and a newborn as an excuse to let me slowly return to normal.

I don't know if I'll try to get pregnant again. But, I want to put my body in the healthiest position in can be in case we decide to. And, even if we don't, I want to feel like me again - not someone with 15 extra pounds, who's "recovering". For me, pregnancy is exhausting so I pretty much didn't work out for 15 weeks. Now, I'm trying to get back in shape, lose the extra pounds (5 to go) and just feel like me again. I run on the treadmill and lift weights, both of which I find so therapeutic. It is the only "me" time I have - alone with my thoughts, mind is focused, and nothing else to think about.

However, I've been struggling to lose these last pounds even though I've been cutting calories, tracking everything I eat, and now beginning to exercise. For me, the extra weight is nothing more than a daily taunt from mother nature to remind me of my loss... getting dressed is unpleasant, and I feel and look terrible. My baby's gone and there's nothing I can do to change that, but I want to change the way my body feels to at least recapture my life and my sanity. I want my control back.

Let me know if you have recommendations on how to get healthy again after a loss, and how to quickly lose those last few pounds while also getting back to an exercise routine. The sooner I can do so, the sooner I can resume life as me, and maybe even get back some sense of control over my body. Peace will be a longer journey, but I hope I can start here.
grnigrl grnigrl 36-40, F 2 Responses Feb 11, 2012

Your Response


I am very sorry for your loss...I suffered the same years ago. I agree with MorningBreeze. Three weeks is an extremely short time, give yourself a break. I completely understand about wanting to throw yourself into something that will take up large amounts of effort and concentration...the relief that gives from the heartache is welcome, indeed. I applaud your choice of "obsessions", as it will serve you well in the future (getting a healthy weight is always a good thing ;-) ) Many, many people suffering a devastating loss choose much less healthy obsessions, further damaging their already bruised psyches.

Truthfully, the less "me time" you have, the "easier" it will be...too much "alone time" leaves too wide a margin in which the grief can run rampant and take hold. Kudos on your spirit and your determination! Warm wishes and fervent prayers for you and yours!!!!!!

I admire your inner strength. Very sorry for your loss. It's only been 3 wks since you miscarried, it will take you a few months for your body to balance out your hormones. It will be a roller coaster ride. You working out, staying postive ..hug... it will help to bring back the ...normal you. Blessings to you hon. Take care.