I have, of course, always known this but as of two minutes ago when I put myself down as a 'maybe' at an old friend's wedding invitation, it kind of hit home.

I really avoid any and all social gatherings and unless something specific demands it, I stay home. The most I venture out on a daily basis is to the store, which is about 2 minutes away by foot.

But surprisingly, I have no social anxiety or problems interacting with people. I often take charge of conversations and do tend to talk quite a lot in smaller groups, provided they are people I know at least somewhat well.

I just don't like having to put on an act, which for me is mandatory, when put in a large group. And I despise meaningless chit chat. Pleasantries and mundane conversations bore me and I can't put on a fake smile, as it has been pointed out to me. My fake smile comes off as condescending and mocking more than anything. lol.

I am so used to being this way now, ever since high school was over and I was no longer required to be in large groups of anything. This is normal to me now, though sometimes I wonder if I'm missing out on something... but I can't say what it is.
TrueZetetic TrueZetetic
26-30, M
Aug 18, 2014