I Am a Recovering Addict
That is actually the title of my autobiography, which was published 2 years ago. I choose that title because it was only but for the grace of God, that I am here today to share my experiences with others. Like anyone who is caught up in the grips of addiction, especially with a drug as incidious as crack, surviving the horrors of it is truly a testament to God's loving Grace and mercy. I became an addict in New York City, where every day during my active drug use, I put my life on the line. I have known so many people who have died as a result of thier drug use, or the life style that they led as a result of thier addiction, that I know that I am truly blessed to have made it through.
However, if surviving the horrors of addiction were not enough, I also have survived owing hundreds of thousands of dollars to drug dealers, and that pedicament had nothing to do with my crack addiction. Unfortunately, I borrowed some money during the real estate boon from a drug dealer to purchase a property that I intended to flip for a profit, but when the deal did not close, the amount of money I borrowed ballooned to astronomical amounts due to the interest that i was charged. The drama that ensued led to my house bieng shot up, with women and children living there, and numerous other threats on my life. Honestly, as I lived through it, I didn't expect to live, and I am shocked that I actually did. Through the Grace of God, I was able to make enough money in ensuing real estate deals to pay off the debts, but I know that I did not accomplish this on my own.
With these struggles also came a lot of successes, if you measure success strictly on how much money one earns. I have made millions of dollars in real estate in my life time, but I have also lost all of the properties that I have owned largely due to the same thinking and behaviors that led me become an addict in the first place. It has truly been a long and winding journey to this point, but as I sit here today, I am thankful for all of the experiences, the good ones as well as the bad ones, because each experience was meant to teach me a lesson.
Today, I certainly don't have it all figured out, and i know that I never will. What I do know is that no matter how challenging life will get, things can always get better, if you never lose the faith.
As a result of my relationship with another addict, I now have two beautiful kids that I have raised from birth, and I credit God for placing them in my life because with out them, i don't know if I ever would have found the strength to stop getting high. Raising kids as a single man has provided its own challenges, but in reality, my children have raised me a whole lot more than I have raised them.
In closing, I hope that someone can find some strength from what I have shared. I know what its like to want to take a gun and blow my head off, but i also know, that if you can withstand the urges to destroy yourself, either through suicide, or suicidal actions, then life can truly show you blessings as a result. Stay strong.
However, if surviving the horrors of addiction were not enough, I also have survived owing hundreds of thousands of dollars to drug dealers, and that pedicament had nothing to do with my crack addiction. Unfortunately, I borrowed some money during the real estate boon from a drug dealer to purchase a property that I intended to flip for a profit, but when the deal did not close, the amount of money I borrowed ballooned to astronomical amounts due to the interest that i was charged. The drama that ensued led to my house bieng shot up, with women and children living there, and numerous other threats on my life. Honestly, as I lived through it, I didn't expect to live, and I am shocked that I actually did. Through the Grace of God, I was able to make enough money in ensuing real estate deals to pay off the debts, but I know that I did not accomplish this on my own.
With these struggles also came a lot of successes, if you measure success strictly on how much money one earns. I have made millions of dollars in real estate in my life time, but I have also lost all of the properties that I have owned largely due to the same thinking and behaviors that led me become an addict in the first place. It has truly been a long and winding journey to this point, but as I sit here today, I am thankful for all of the experiences, the good ones as well as the bad ones, because each experience was meant to teach me a lesson.
Today, I certainly don't have it all figured out, and i know that I never will. What I do know is that no matter how challenging life will get, things can always get better, if you never lose the faith.
As a result of my relationship with another addict, I now have two beautiful kids that I have raised from birth, and I credit God for placing them in my life because with out them, i don't know if I ever would have found the strength to stop getting high. Raising kids as a single man has provided its own challenges, but in reality, my children have raised me a whole lot more than I have raised them.
In closing, I hope that someone can find some strength from what I have shared. I know what its like to want to take a gun and blow my head off, but i also know, that if you can withstand the urges to destroy yourself, either through suicide, or suicidal actions, then life can truly show you blessings as a result. Stay strong.
By:
StanM1
Age:
46-50
,
Male
