Constant Battle To Stay Off Opiates

Ive been clean for 20 days today and feel a little less cofident everyday. I know i wont go back to what I was doing (needle use). the craving for just a little creeps on me day by day. I feel worn down and if had the drug infront of me i would of broken down. I keep setting myself up not to be in certain positions and I stay outta trouble. I have truely worn my body down with needle use and even had to muscle heroin at age 22 because i had no viens. Im hitting 3 weeks tommarow and 1 week away from my first month. Its what happens after that im scared of. If I feel like I got this beat let go and party after 3 weeks what am i going to feel like at a month. Ill just try and keep busy and stay outta trouble but dam f***ing up just sounds so good sometimes.
ninmike ninmike
22-25, M
2 Responses Apr 30, 2012

Needle use aint good bro but im not here to give you a lecture,takeing it to the dome is almost as good in my opinion,it might take a little longer but in my exsperence thats the only difference,im gonna be real with you,its going to be something that you will fight a daily battle with untill the day you die,maybe you will be better off if you can kick the stuff but from my exsperence the quality of life isnt nearly as good,in my opinion being clean is over hyped,people want to make it seem like after a certain amount of time its all sunshine and smiles but its not,but if you do decide to get clean i urge you to ask your doctor about neurontin for anxiety because there not going to give you benzos,the neurontin puts me in a really good "kinda high" mood,a lot of people dont like it but i think its the **** in its own way. Good luck.

Congrats. Keep the faith n Keep coming abck.<br />
Love n Hugs