Old School Courting

So maybe I am a romantic, maybe I am not, I am not entirely sure but I have always wanted to do this. It is kind of based on the story of my parents. And I guess I get it from them. Doubt I will ever get to though.

Briefly about their story: My mom and dad met in college. She was a freshman and he was a junior. My dad fell for my mom instantly and was in love with her for almost 2 years before he disclosed it. The feelings were reciprocated and they courted for 8 years while finishing their medical education before finally getting married. She was his first and only girlfriend and he was her first and only boyfriend. Just last year they celebrated 25 years of their marriage by taking a month long tour to Europe. That was me and my sister's gift to them.

Anyways when I see them, even though they have had rough patches, its always special. To my dad, my mom is till date the most important person in this world. To my mom, dad is #3(well in all fairness we are great kids :P). I told them when I saw them in December, I want something similar to what you guys had.

I want to meet her, the one special girl. And I slowly want to fall in love with her. I don't want anything to be rushed. I want it to be special in every way. I don't want to disclose my feelings to her right away. Neither do I want to know hers. I want our feelings to be a secret we both share ourselves. I want to have those restless nights where I know I will see her tomorrow and I don't have a clue of what to do. I want there to be subtle hints like maneuvering our schedules to just take a class together. Stealing glances in class while we think the other is not looking. I want to have the feeling of euphoria when I get a text/call from her. I want to spend time being dreamy eyed while my friends wonder what is going on. All this time only riding on hints.

And then when I would be somewhat convinced of how she feels I would disclose my feelings to her. After which I want to court her like a lover should in my opinion. I don't want to take her on dates to expensive restaurants and spend the evening seducing her. I want to take a walk with her and get to know her. I want to be silly with her and enjoy the small moments. I don't want it to be physical attraction, I need it to be emotional attraction. I want to have those small things like study dates, classroom dates, shopping dates, hairdressing dates etc. I would introduce her to my family and she would introduce me to hers. We would get close to each others families. We would get together to celebrate festivals as "kids" of the family. Then when we would be ready to take on the responsibility, I would first ask her family for permission and then propose to her. My ideal proposal..well I cant give it away but it would be simple yet elegant. I wont be flashy but it will be lovely. And I would hope she says "yes"

After which point we are supposed live happily ever after. Which does not mean life will be a breeze, but rather in case of a storm we stand together to face it, knowing we are there for each other no matter what.

Lol that just sounds ridiculous haha. But there, that would be somewhat my ideal love story. In my head it has a lot more to it.
Floydian Floydian
26-30, M
4 Responses Jul 5, 2012

Some things in this are ideal, other things just seem to be part of the Disney fantasy that we all seemed to be brainwashed with. The one thing I can not agree on more is that I do not want to impress anyone. I do not want to prove who I am, nor expect someone to prove to me who they are. The proof is in the pudding as they say, being with someone, sharing with someone, that is the real proof. Not one judging the other, but simply building together making all the pieces fit.

I would not say disney fairytale since I have seen it happen but I know when i write it down it comes out like that. What you said though, making the pieces fit, that is important. Just in my case instead of wanting the pieces to be big I want them to be small, tiny things. I would want the relationship to be built from ground up.

That is beautiful. I wish that and more for you with the one. Love is awesome but not without pains and sacrifices. Yes...enjoy each other company in small ways and get to know the person from the inside and all it little pettiness that you would fine adoring. Love glows with each little bits and pieces of the person that you find inside that person that others wouldn't take the time to listen or to look. Love is like treasure hunting. Few would stumbled upon it while most must really pay attention or they'll miss the best that is right in front of them the whole time. Love is you seek then love you shall find but don't lose your way should you stumble and fall. Keep you heart and mind on that trophy of love and surely you will get there.

Thank you loveunme, I really like the way you describe love. Its beautiful.

ideal, indeed! reading your story makes me want to go back to my high school days, when everything else was light and free... lots of roses everywhere! *reminiscing*<br />
<br />
this could really happen to you! it takes a lot of hard work and determination to make a relationship work. but who knows? you could meet her soon! nothing is impossible, ;-) good luck!

Ah high school, you *****, why did you have to get over lol.

There is a bunch of reasons why this would probably not happen but the biggest one is probably that as soon as I think I like someone I will try to push her away. And to be honest lately(almost a year and half) I have not even found someone who excites me in the least bit.

patience is a virtue. ;-) lol.

and if ever you find the right one, i'm pretty sure, there will be no "pushing her away" this time. everything will fall into place. :)

Haha you seem to have the confidence in the wrong person, I know I will get up and leave if that is what it takes and im even more ****** up for knowing how I will react but what is the point in denying. And well patience see the problem is I think "i'm just hung up on somebody that I used to know" lol. Or not, but I have not felt the way she made me feel from any of the girls who wanted to be with me during this whole time.

i think, that would be another story. lol

just stay positive. like they always say, "you'll know when you find it."

1 More Response

Guess it is silly we never played that game in high school we fell inlove very early with each other we were so close many thought we were twins other then she was a lot shorter then i was<br />
<br />
on day the start of second year high school the eacher siad it was so neat to have twins in her class and the whole class started to laugh at her and she became very upset<br />
<br />
she ask the class what was so funny and they said nothing other then they are not twins they are married and the teacher freaked out and took us to the office to see if the office knew any thing about this<br />
<br />
they told the teacher she was really over reacting that yes they were well aware we had been married over a year before as a few of the treachers were they it was not hidden at all

I don't think its silly at all. You did what you had to do in your love story and it turned out fine right? Everyone has a different perception. It just depends how you see things. What I posted up there is somewhat of my ideal love story, will it really be that way? Probably not.

i like your sory and your ideas we just fell inlove early and we always had each other

we walked side by side we rode bikes side by side and we had more then one fight with others still side by side

but i am afraid the old school love like you dream about is going to be far and inbetween the world has become very much a throw away thing

I am glad you still could enjoy those things. I agree with you that is pretty much a cast away. I have a had a girl think I did not like her because I would not initiate physical intimacy with her, which to me was absurd. But either way, like I said below if I get it, GREAT! If not, then the way Jeff Goldblum put it: Life always finds a way haha!