Do you ever think about hanging? Of all the S&M things I like hanging the best. And, like you, I like it either way. I would love to hang you, and I would love to be hanged by you.
In B&D you'd be called a 'switch,' you like to be both a slave and a master. Many people have these kinds of fantasies, as long as they are play acted by two consenting adults they are fine to live out. You should investigate B&D and find friend who will enjoy doing this with you.
B&D = Bondage & Dominance, I have no idea why c*ckjoy put it this way, maybe because that's his own preference? BDSM = Bondage, Discipline, Dominance, Submission, Sadism, Masochism, it's an umbrella term.
He is correcy about the "switch" thing btw: having feelings for both sides of the coin makes someone a "switch", but what you identify as is all up to you, don't let people decide who you are. :-)
Just like I disagree about "like to be both a slave and a master", Master and slave are titles, not roles. Of course one can like being a slave or Master, but we shouldn't confuse roles with titles: one officially is a slave when one is owned by someone. But don't take it from me, this is just my view and how I interpret terminology, how you interpret it is all up to you of course. :-) If you think Master or slave can be a role: sure, it's a bit confusing, but if you feel that way, you're totally entitled to that (pun not itended).
Oh and I don't think you "should" find a friend who will enjoy doing this with you, I think you "should" educate yourself and besides that you shouldn't do anything. You only should do what you feel is right, but again: that's just my opinion, some people actually believe in "slave training" or "the One Twue Way" and other BS.