I Can't Do This Anymore

I want people to stop judging! My god, I want to go out in a short sleeve shirt; and when I bring up why it upsets me people get mad at me for cutting in the first place. I wish the ******* scars would go away. I wish I could stop sneaking blades. I wish I were dead. I hate this life. I hate living this way. I wish I could stop; stop restricting food, stop purging, stop cutting, stop bruising, everything. But I can't. I'm too far in to ever stop.I need help. Please help me.
shouldbedead shouldbedead
13-15, F
4 Responses May 24, 2012

I can't wear shorts, or tank tops. I've learned to cope with my arms showing, I really have no choice. I know how you feel, it's Summer time and everyone's starting to wear shorts and go swimming, it is literally infuriating. I'm tired of people ******* staring at my scars, I've actually gotten jokes from a couple of people about it. :/ I look repulsive because of them, my entire shins just have these huge bright red wide gashes overlapping all over, even though it's been several long months since I've cut them. It isn't fair, and it's so difficult to find anyone to relate to in this area.

Im srry u hv 2 deal w/ tht, ive been cutting myself for 2 yrs now & im kinda addicted, i used 2 drink a bit& i was anorexic so ik how u feel, plz message me sometime, id like 2 tlk 2 some1 who gets it& hopefully i can help u

`I started cutting 3 years ago due to PTSD after sexual abuse.. I always wore long glove to cover the scars so i know how you feel. I wouldn't ever judge you. I hope in the end that you can walk without shame. Some scars might stay with you but others will fade, and those that stay with you, you should be proud and think that you survived and not to see them as a bad thing.. xXx

i know that im a stranger but talk to me if you like