Who Am I

I am a sensitive person .. words can sting and stay with me forever.. running all over my mind like a crippling disease .... why make someone feel worse than they already do... But then again I am a sensitive person.

To do something special for another to want them to feel special that they are loved... it makes me smile and I feel warm inside that Ive done something to make them happy or smile... Sometimes not worth the effort.. and  sometimes what i see in my mind doesn't happen.... And yet i still do it... Because i like doing it.. Yes Its sometimes disappointing .. and Yes i get upset.....I wouldn't be human if i didn't.. But I will never understand how someone can brush of a loving gesture like an annoying mosquito.

But then again I am a sensitive person.

caroli9 caroli9
41-45, F
3 Responses May 28, 2007

My husband comes from divorced parents. He is very hard to get through to. He loves my loving gestures when all is well. But if we disagree on something, he will not accept it from me. The first 4 years I knew him, he always accepted my loving gesture and we got over the fight or whatever.<br />
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Last time we fought, he did not accept it.. I talked to him about it and he said if he gives in he feels like he is not heard to the extent he wants to be heard. Not only does he want to tell me how he feels, but he wants to show me how he feels for days. I told him that is manipulating behavior and hurts me.<br />
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This last fight we had he apologized. He has never apologized for the 5 years I have known him.. So that was really cool! :)<br />
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I would say God knows your loving gestures. He says the least you do to my children you do unto me. Therefore, even if God's children don't know or don't acknowledge your gesture, God does.<br />
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Because my family and relatives are mean to me most of the time, I've decided that God and I know who I am and I don't have to prove it to anyone. God knows and I know.<br />
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Though sometimes I still cry because it would be nice for them (my family and relatives) to notice what kind of character I have.

Hello .<br />
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I just watched a really good movie which talks about Zen, living in the moment. Not worried about the past or present. It also talks about who are you when you can not do the thing you love. And they talk about a whole lot of other hard questions while seeing 2 guys relate out of respect for each other.<br />
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One guy is a gymnast, and the other guy, "Socrates", does what he wants when he wants. Socarates is the guy giving the advice. He does not seem like much, but he can move mountains with his philosophy.<br />
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This movie came at a time when I had many questions. It turns out sometimes I already do what Socrates says, and sometimes I act like the Kid/20 year old.<br />
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It is a very DEEP movie. I would highly recommend it for those of us who are lost

Your right ... ive read and re-read your comment .. im smiling to myself because you are right.. and you said everything i needed to hear.... Thankyou ..