TOO Damn Sensitive

It gets me in trouble all the time.  Taking peoples jokes or light prodding as being a personal attack or something more than just a little ribbing.  I think that Fukitol that I've started taking may help me be less sensitive.  I think being sensitive is a good thing in moderation but you can't go around being super sensitive and expect to be able to function in the world.  Things are much too dark and unknown out there for the super sensitive.

ReformedAutomaton ReformedAutomaton
41-45, M
16 Responses Jun 7, 2007

Well at least you're conscious of it even if you're not sure which ones are real. It's a start.

it's something I've been working on for a long long time- trying to teach my mind/body which cues are "real" and which ones are just products of my misbegotten past- i think i have a hard telling the difference though.

Wow Shierke you really put something into words there that I haven't thought of before but certainly experience. I also feel like I can let things go or not take things personally when someone says something to me that might be offensive. Or I will talk trash right back to them or something. But often I will perceive a slight by someone and it will really get to me. Many a sidelong comment or perceived negative body language has thrown me into a depressive episode. It's so strange cause, like you said, I know I'm often misreading things but I somehow can't get past it.

As one of those people who is too damn sensitive i sympathize. Nearly all my emotion is internalized and i have a hard time explaing or expressing how i feel otherwise. <br />
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Somehow despite all that i feel that i am a very emotional person. I'm good at ignoring what most people say, because i live in my own bubble of reality more often than not- its the cues that get me... things that people do or don't do that i have assigned meaning to. <br />
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I really gotta stop doing that though. Because of all the things in my life that are wonky- my cues are not at all accurate. <br />
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i dont really think i'll ever be less sensitive though, i just wish rather i was sensitive to the right things.

While it can be difficult for others to understand sensitive people, I think it is a gift to feel compassion for your fellows. I feel sorry for those who deny what takes place around them so they can protect themeselves. I also think that it is important to be able to keep a stable mind when things go wrong. Being sensitive is a good thing but maintaining composure through times of distress is also important.

Yes my hubby says I'm too sensitive, because I'm always worried about if someone else is okay. We had flooding recently and I was crying becase some neighbors had their master bedroom wall wash out. He was like " well yeah, we coulda had it worse." and I said " I know, but WE didn't. They are suffering right now." And I was upset because I couldn't get out there to help out, much. I relieved some of that misplaced guilt, by sending some clothes to one f the families that had lost EVERYTHING.

I think it's a little bit of both Lindy...I know that I can be overly sensitive but I also know that many other people don't know and/or don't care that they are quick to say whatever comes to mind regardless of how it affects other people. I know that part of my problem is that I'm sensitive but not very emotionally literate. I experience deep feelings and get hurt easily but I have a very hard time expressing my own feelings. It's something that I'm working through, learning to be emotionally literate. I'm learning to talk things through with people, letting those close to me know when they've hurt me instead of just letting things go as I have in the past. I'm only just now learning how dangerous it is to not express myself. I am a recovering alcoholic/addict and it's crucial that I move forward in learning to deal with issues and people rather than just internalizing.

Thank you Elena, brilliant as always. You are so right that people mostly say negative things about one another, even though they are usually "joking" or just giving you a hard time. I think psychologically these are tools people use to raise themselves up in socially sanctioned ways by bringing others down. I will do my best to stop caring what others say about me. I'm really tired of caring actually. Not tired of caring about other people but of caring about their impression of me.

thank you :)

Very beautifully said :)

Exactly. <br />
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Let the darkest-of-dark roll off of your down and afloat you shall stay.

It's admirable to know who you are. Having a thick skin is definitely not always a strength. But it has advantages. I just need to find a happy medium that makes me comfortable. I think I'm doing it somewhat, becoming bolder when it feels right but also being less sensitive to others, even when I can tell they are trying to be rude. Just like water off a duck's back right?

I'm always looking for thicker skin, though I think we are meant to live within the skin of which we are given.<br />
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I don't think I'd be comfortable with myself, the person I know I am, but whom all others may not, if I was that "stronger" person I long to be. Time will tell.

I'd love to share some Fukitol but my scrip ran out :( <br />
Thanks for your comments ladies, at least we can have compassion for each other even if not for ourselves.

Same here Warmth......I wouldn't want to lose my ABILITY to be makes me who I am....but how great if I could put a thick coat of insensitivity on my own back.<br />
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Hey you know where I can buy some of that Fukitol....or maybe you have some to spare that you could share with me??! : )

True enough RA, point well taken!!