2 and Counting

i've been married 2 times. and absolutely love my current boyfriend which makes me think he will be #3. i find that kinda disgusting. i'm not very proud of the fact i've been married twice. i always seem to get bored with people after awhile. everythings exciting at the beginning and then i usually find little things about that person that bug me.  i don't know why i'm like that. i wish i could be happy and stay married forever. my parents have been married 52 yrs my grandparents were married over 60 yrs. what is wrong with me. i'm not perfect so why do i think every guy i've been with has to be? i just don't see spending years with the same person. i think i'm always looking for the unknown, the excitement.....
prettyinpink prettyinpink
46-50, F
3 Responses Feb 22, 2007

I've been married four times but never had any children. I never trusted any man I've been with to father my children. I'm over 60 and absolutely love my current partner. We met over 40 years ago and have reconnected after having led very different adult lives. We plan to get married in around a year or so. I'm well educated and hold a professional job. I always ended past relationships amicably rather than prolonging the struggle and pain. It's just the way I am. I'm glad that society is beginning to view serial marriers as yet another version of the way people relate to one another and engage in relationships. I don't believe in "until death do us part" or "in sickness and in health"; rather I think "until we decide it might be better to part company" has worked best for me and might be the best course of action for others as well. I am elated to be loved by a wonderful man who accepts me for who I am. So, why not get married again? And, quite honestly, I plan to stay with this man, always. He's a gem !

relationships of any type are a LOT of work once you begin to get beyond that euphoric stage. something i've found after each of my 2 divorces is that the little idiosyncricies i once found annoying and at times purely disturbing were the very things i'd come to miss in their absence. i've heard widowers and widows say the same thing too. something else i've realized is that when i'm not necessarily happy with myself, i become more critical, harsh and certainly much more sensitive to anything they say or do. it's at this time i keep it to myself until i resurface again. (i have a neurological pain disorder and it makes me a bit cranky. this was the reason my 2nd husband i divorced - it wasn't fair to him. my first husband and i divorced when he got his mistress pregnant ...) i wish you lots of happiness ... but it's all up to you. sometimes you just have to DECIDE to be happy - not that it always works. it does not. but it can be helpful from time to time - at least it has been for me. all my best to you.

You are maybe not ready for marriage. You are still young. Anyway you should see a trained professional if you want the right answer. You are like Ross on friends, lol. Good luck with this new one and don't expect so much from the future. Everybody must have the moments where they think someone out there is better for them. And life will never always be like it was when you were dating. Things will die down but you will still both love each other and it is up to you to make yourself happy. If you are bored it is up to you to find something interesting to do. He is mainly there for support. You are just hoping the love you had during your first month or year will carry on forever. People get used to each other and are just happy the one they love is there.