Single Motherhood

I am about to go through a divorce so I am going to have to take care of myself and my 2 year old son alone. I've never been allowed to have a job so this is going to be tough.
dreamofme dreamofme
22-25, F
10 Responses Jan 5, 2007

Its hard at first, but something just "kicks in" and we get it done. Looking back I have no idea how but like I said something just,"kicks in." Promise!

Hi "dreamofme," I just want to say, you can absolutely do this! I was raised completely by my single mother, and it was the most rewarding experience for the both of us. We definitely had our struggles, but we have the closest relationship! I look up to her more than anyone else in the world, and I am sure you and your son will be more than fine! :)

You will be a single mom but not a 24/7 single mom. Chances are you will share custody with your ex for your son. You will most likely get every other weekend to yourself. You will have it a lot easier than someone like me who is a 24/7 single mom. The hardest part is finding reliable daycare but if the government will pay for your to go to school to educate yourself and get a good job for yourself and your son, take it. Anything you can do to better yourself will help your son in the long run. Good luck. Put your mind to it and you can accomplish anything.

you can do it...<br />
like they say "woman has her own strength"

It's the right decision Vixen, you know that, cause if it is something you are meant to do or was meant to be, it would work, if it won't... then it's not... you know that too. You will no doubt find it daunting but it will be an exciting new change, a time for you to live for you & your son. If you were so unhappy, why should you remain like that for the rest of forever just to please the world at large or your husband... that's insane... why should you sacrifice your life's destiny just to keep someone happy.<br><br><br />
Some will come along who'd inspire you, I hope & pray & I know you deserve this, Vixen. I have a friend who sounds so much like you & she is wild & she is such a great person but she had given so much of herself away until now, so she concentrates more now on herself & her daughter, it is hard for her too. Nobody thought she could pull it off on her own... she is about to prove them all wrong but those who believed her will be happier for it, including her daughter. Her boyfriend is a good man too but sometimes lives' converge and lead onto two different paths... if that is the case too much, no matter who is good or not or wrong or not... it just won't work.<br><br><br />
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Hope today is one of excitement & change for you girl...<br><br><br />
<br><br><br />
Kick arse...! LOL.

I would have to know more about your situation and reasons for divorcing before I commented in detail as hydi did. Yes, having a fatherly figure is important to girls and boys. However, there are circumstances such as mine where having no father figure is better than having her father around. Nobody knows your situation as well as you do. I enjoy being a single mother and there are advantages as well as disadvantages. I can understand your fears as you seem to have been very dependent upon your husband for financial support. However, you can do this! Check into support systems in your area. See if you can find help to go to school. When I got pregnant with mine I had only had one job doing laundry in a nursing home. While I was pregnant I went to a vo-tech and became a certified Administrative Assistant. Now, ten years later I am making more than my college graduate friends and still able to support my daughter on my own (no child support). It is and has been a challenge but the rewards are enough to keep me going. If you would like to email me for advise ... bdegelnor@gmail.com

Have faith in yourself, you can do it.

You can do it. We believe in you!

I raised my daughter alone from the time she was 7 mths. Now she's 22 yrs. It was hard at times but we made it. I remember we were the happiest when we had next to nothing. Go figure.<br />
If you need to talk, I'm here for you.<br />
<br />
lilyofthenile

I feel sorry for you and for your 2 yrs old son, I wonder why you looking for divorce,, you must be lucky and God must help you, either to tring once more with your husband, if you realy want to forgive your husband and your self, who ever is reason to split the young family:anyone of you who is cruel to other and is responsible fo devorce, will continue to have hard time with thier new partener in future, unless unless you meet some one much worcer, i will advice you, as a well wisher to you or anyone, As OLD SAYING GOES;ie Take a good look of yourself, you will look other differently, It is with time very difficult to raise the children alone, and in process of upbringing if you dont keep the set of rules, the kid turn in monsters, and will make the life of single mother terrible, your children need a fatherly figure an role models, and some one who gives them dicipline, , it is always easy to say oh my children are good and great but behind the great praises there is always something family and motherly bitter secrets, that we dont want to say being parents to give good picture or fool other, or even fooling ourselves, Best advice I want to give if your as complete women with all the needs of woman that god has blessed, with your kindness, , serve ypur husband and being kind to him , you will be rewarded by a gentleman who needs a woman, who can serve you and with all the generosty, to rewards you for what you give him ,espacially when he feels what he means to his wife, women dont like to be submitting to thier husbands, submissions has its own rewards, beside many women would never imagine to be sumissive , as woman libration has kept women alone as well as men, as scares away the good and humble parteners, who have so much to give,, woman must be tough but not to his husband, and men love to be protected by a kind and loving woman like a lioness,, . there is nothing wrong