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I Am a Single Mom.

OK, I will not b i t c h too much for 2 reasons, 1. I Love my kids and 2. I know there are many women who would give ANYTHING to be a mother, whether they be single or married and I truly do not wish to disrespect my children or the women who would switch places with me in a blink of an eye.

I'm not asking or even wanting to give up being a mother, it's just as a young child this was NOT the way it was suppose to happen. I NEVER once thought that I would divorce (not sure why considering the statistics) but seriously this is NOT what I signed up for, OK so allow me to indulge for a few minutes and have my very own pity party.

My sons are truly amazing miracles to me and I do consider them a gift, BUT please this amount of responsibility can sometimes be overwhelming and I know that I have it better than many other single parents. I never have to worry about my ex paying child support, and I am VERY GRATEFUL for that.

Buy my grade 7 and 5 math skills SUCK and as for french, Lord I barely remember a word. I hated homework when I was a kid, I don't want to do it AGAIN, i don't do it obviously but i have to help. Science projects are a NIGHTMARE, i HATED science, i don't want to watch things grow in a pee-try dish, or freeze *things* in my freezer. Lord my kids bedrooms are a scientific ON GOING experiment. OK so HOMEWORK SUCKS.

Now we have to deal with puberty, yikes, I'm a girl, thank heavens i had brothers so i knew what my sons would deal with and of course I am not a complete idiot when it comes to male anatomy. BUT seriously what 13 year old son, wants to hear about wet dreams and morning erections from their MOTHER!! I'd rather have a lobotomy than having those discussions with my kids, which i did, because my ex wouldn't and i didn't want them TERRIFIED about these things.

Now it is also time to talk about ************ and let them know that it is normal and healthy and that despite what other parents may say they will NOT go blind. This was NOT part of my childhood fantasy when thinking of the stupid white picket fence, 2.5 kids and a dog.

SO i am watching my innocent, pure, babies turn into young men, with hair growing EVERYWHERE!! Lord i hate this. Now i knew this day would come, but DARN i thought i would have a husband to deal with some of these delicate issues.

ALMOST done. So dealing with the emotional issues of their changing bodies, I'm also tired of doing EVERYTHING. It never ends, i sleep less and worry more .... did i sign that school trip form? When is Pizza day? Are their gym clothes clean? Where are all their socks? Can i meet all my financial duties? How much is gas going to cost this week? Hell did i get the oil changed recently? Shoot i forgot to change the filter for the furnace. Crap there is a bird's nest in the troughs?

OK my b i t c h i n g  is over and i feel better. God Bless my kids .... BUT Calgon .... take me away!

AlwaysRemembers AlwaysRemembers 41-45, F 9 Responses May 22, 2007

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Dear Strong Mom,

You are doing pretty well. Wishes for You & the growing Young Men.

:)

Prayers.

__/|__

I commend you cause this is what single parents need to hear and are more then often reluctant to share. I have 2 girls and 1 son and you've opened my eyes of whats to come and that is scary lol. Lawd....what can we do but get through it. We we're the ones strong enough to stand by them knowing the hardships we face. I applaud the single parents out there. Thanks again for sharing.

Lol you need to sit back and laugh at how silly and small this all is. For example last week my son ran into a door I told him to wash his leg so he ran into the bathroom. Of course he slips and falls again. But he needed to top off the accident by falling for the final time on his way in the tub. I was upset at first but now I laugh thinking moe larry and curly are living in my son

Lol..I am not laughing at you..Just nice to see that I'm not the only one who feels so overwhelmed at times!! I do it all..INCLUDING the financial part! It is very stressful & I am raising 3 daughters..I always wanted kids, but never imagined doing it ALL on my own!! Sounds like you are "normal" to me..At least from a single moms standpoint!! There isn't a manual on parenting, but sounds like you have a good head on your shoulders..At least you take interest regarding your sons' well being(even if some topics you'd rather not..lol) Some parents are neglectful altogether!! So, keep being a strong single mom..I'm sure your boys will one day see all that you do/have done for them..& Appreciate you even more for doing it solo..Take care!!

Thanks for sharing. It is wonderful to know someone is giong through exactly what I am.



When I feel overwelmed, I write things down. It empties the mind and really helps.

Mikey455,

Everyone lives in their own dream and unfortunately for you, it seems like you have chosen a nightmare.

Best of luck to you because it sounds like you need it and dont forget that we were all young once, even you!



Keep up the good work "Always Remembers" and enjoy your beautiful boys!

No one ever told me this but, I have been programmed by nature to always to "bring" a woman off before I came! Is this unusual for men or what?

Meantime the best of luck with your sons you sound such a caring mature mom.

Hey Celainn and Emerald, thanks for your comments. Unfortunately Emerald I have NO family as they disowned me a while a go for 5 years and we tried to reconcile but it didn't last long before I disowned them. The first time my mom saw her Grandchildren, she looked at me and said * I'm not a babysitter *. Well

H e l l , even if she wanted too, I never would let her, due to her own poor performance as my mother, but how about, Lord, They are beautiful!!

The one things my sons learned VERY early was the significance of the word NO! Due to the fact that i was raped. They KNOW, whether for now it is me or a friend the first time they hear the word no, THEY STOP!!

Actually you have an advantage over teaching them the birds and bees that more than likely wouldn't have come from their Dad. See, you can teach them how to RESPECT their women... sexually, mentally, physically, ect. For instance, the one thing I do have to admire about my Ex Hubby is that he never FINISHED his end of the sex until I did ( or he thought I did! lol). His Daddy DID NOT teach him that! His Mother told me one time, when her son reached his late teen years she set him aside for a conversation: "Son, if you truely love a woman, you will respect HER, cherish her, and get her Off before you get YOURS!!" True story! A male would benefit from a woman's perspective; and surely a female would benifit from a male figure. And lastly... I can sympathize with your single-hood plight of raising children. I did it for a few yrs. myself, but with one child, and it was a girl. Your examples hit home with reality, and similar experience. I wish you luck! Do you have extended family members that will help you out on those touchy times?? I hope so. I had a very supportive mom and sister. They WERE my CALGON!! =}