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I Am A Sociopath. If You Have Questions. Now Is The Time.

I am not your typical sociopath. Serial killer, unable to make friends, etc.

I did have trouble making friends when I was young. But i soon learned what everyone was looking for.
I am able to fake emotions and actions I pick up from different people I knw.

Once I knew what worked with who, it was easy.

I tried to make friends with a guy I lost contact with so I would have enough brothers for my wedding.
I was with a girl for 2 years just so I could make her life miserable by getting her attached and than breaking up with her beacuse she made my life miserable.

During the start, I had no feelings about hurting other people's feeling.
I still don't, but I have learnt what hurts and what should not be done if you do not want to offend people.

I have learned to be a social charmeleon adapting to different people and at different working environments.

As sociopaths, we do feel regret and attachedment pretty much like you are attached to your car.
The key difference that seperates us is we see other humans much like you see objects so other humans are pretty much like robots to us.

I know I want to kill the idiot that everyone else in the office hates, but I also know that the risk of getting caught isn't worth it, that is why I don't do it.
If there was a god and he handed me a knife and told me I won't get caught I won't hesitate to slash his throat.
I want to rape every single hot girl I walk past, but again, the risk of getting caught.

I have grown and adapted into this society where I know I can't do anything as I please.
Everything I do has an objective (Normal people call it Motive i believe).

If you have a question for the typical "Adaptive, smart, able to climb high in the workplace" Sociopath.
Now is the time. Post it in the comments and I will try to answer them.

Learn how they work and how they think.
ARealSociopath ARealSociopath 22-25 135 Responses Jan 16, 2011

Your Response


Well i have a question and i hope for an 16 years a female and my mother passed away in October of last year. During the funeral when her body was laid out i went to go see her i didnt cry nor did i feel any emotions i just looked at her and smiled. Every stopped and stared and they said "why arent you crying?" I just kept smiling and said "i dont really know.." and sat down in my seat next to oldest sister and younger brother i was the middle child of our family. When the pastor asked for final words my sister got up there and said "I think Nejla has a few words." I just looked at her and the crowd and back to her. I said "Sure.." I went up there and said "My mother was.." and i just bursted into laugher! I told the crowd "My mother treated me like **** when i was younger. Calling me ugly, a piece of ****. And worthless. I glad this ***** is dead. She treated her other kids with respect but me!" I just kept laughing and smiling to myself. I looked down at my sister and told "Dont cry ***** you know you dont miss her." And i walked out...When it was time for the after service or whatever my mothers family kept calling me disgusting and a psychopath. And the family asked who gets to keep her money and in the name was mine..."she doesn't deserve this ****" my uncle said. I didnt care i just kept smiling. After i took all my mothers jewelry and money and pawned it. I was left with about 200,000 or more, hell i didnt care. When i told my dad what happened he seemed like he didnt care he was actually proud of me for standing up for myself. He just hugged me and told im not crazy and i know im not...he said he experienced the same things when he was younger. Is this normal? I currently live on my own and the only person i stay in contact is my father. I dont need help do I?

I was with one for like a year and a half. I didn't know that he was at the time and he doesn't seem to know (or he just denies it). He seems less severe than most that I have heard about. Everything was going great until I started telling him about how frustrated my mom made me. He stopped seeing me in person because he would have to be around her to see me. He began to HATE her with a passion. He called her everything he could (using anything I told him or that he noticed) and it caused me a lot of pain. He started telling me to either promise to never see or talk about her again or break up. I eventually got him to "compromise". He told me that I could see her as much as I wanted and that he would help me through it as much as possible. (He seemed to think that me being around her was not good for me because she made me frustrated and sad). Later on, my mom separated us. No contact whatsoever. He was very mad and depressed from what I heard. When I used someone else's phone to talk to him, all was good for awhile. Back to normal. I found out that he cheated and confronted him about it. He just said that he needed a distraction. That really upset me. A week or two later, he promised to meet me somewhere (it was two hours away from where he lived) and bailed at the last minute saying that his mom wouldn't let him because she didn't want us together, that she would take away his car cause she was paying for it. Then, he broke up with me saying that we reached out limit and that it was too painful to be together. I have two questions: 1. do you think he is really a sociopath
2. Could he have really cared at all?

Btw, his best friend that is even closer to him than I was that I am like 90% sure is not a sociopath always told me what a good person he is and how he really did love me.

I have a question. He broke up with me for the third time six days ago and is still giving me the silent treatment. The first time he left it's because he cheated on me with a ******** and I didn't find out till a year later but he came back two weeks later. The second time he left again with no response and came back after I think he thought I moved on and asked for a book back that I borrowed but I don't even think he finished it or even ever read them... and this is the third time... but this time it was different. We had a perfect day the day before then all the sudden he go weird and called me 22 times because I hung up on him cuz he put me on hold and it irritated me. Then finally when I answered he was irritated with me and said he'd text me... then we talked for a few then I confronted him and I asked if we were together and he said "**** no" and haven't heard from him in still days but I haven't contacted him... he did randomly post a sad song and idk if I'm being paranoid but the title was "if you go , leave the key in the mailbox " which he gave me a key necklace at the beginning of the relationship was very important to me... plus he is very into post hard core and hasn't really listened to cute stuff since the beginning of our relationship which hooked me on him... the song was by "never shout never btw" so I'm wondering if that was on purpose...also... i don't know if he lost his job that he had for a year but his location on fb is never where he works it's either at different areas or his home at night but it's crucial he has to have a job because he has major payments to make... so can he lie about his location to **** with me I didn't know that was possible.. but when we were together he hated me knowing where he was cuz it bothered him so if it's possible I feel by him doing this it's intentional. And finally... idk if sociopaths have patterns on how they return depending on their plan and how the breakup happened... but is it possible he's taking a different approach on me on how he wants to target me this time.. lastly haha if I block him on Facebook will this **** him off or trigger him to try harder? Because I've been debating blocking him but I don't know which is worse. Keeping him on or blocking him? Thanks.

Why would you want to be with this tool?

I broke up with my boyfriend a few weeks ago and since then learned he's a narcissistic & or sociopath but I still love & want to be with him I know he is incapable of loving me ba but all the same I still want to be with him how do I get him to talk to me & come back to me ?

im 14, a female and im a sociopath, i do have some sick tendencies i wont mention here, but my main issue in this particular point in time is 'love' ive got most of it down, but its so dam difficult, i still do like people but its only towards an individual, but i am not dating that individual, im dateing someone whom is attractive funny exc.. no chemistry tho, and i have no emotional interest in this character, this is all quite hard to explain in text, but i need some help here, cuz this relationship makes me feel like a trapped rat, with smeone nudgeing my heart with a needle cuz i have no controll of this situation, and i know abandoning this relationship will destroy the advantages of being friends with him, and i want to maintain it, its all quite confuseing i know

Add a response...

I have a question. Could my ex sociopath hack into my phone and social media? I think he is staying with someone in my apartment complex. Could he be doing this? Thanks!

He could be doing anything.

Hopefully, you are able to answer some questions for me. I appreciate everything you said about not feeling. It seems like another world for me all together, because I am an empath (live mostly on feeling). If I can say one thing to you, it is sucks for both of us. When you are a sociopath you exploit and manipulate others to project a false image of who you are. When your are an empath you are too in touch with your emotions and you feel not only your own sensitive emotions, but you also can feel the emotions of those around you. It gets tricky. I'm interested in knowing from you and your personal experiences IF you ever got more horny in the middle of an argument with a significant other? I know the man I am dating (4 months) a sociopath.....and since I am aware of my true self, anytime I am trying to protect myself from his crazy bullshit excuses (that are never rational = LIES) we end up fighting mostly through texts. This can go on for 2 days, but when I get real honest and tell him I am mentally too strong for him and I consider him a 'dark soul' or 'emotional vampire' he will immediately send a text stating "I want to **** you so bad right now!" (Clearly, this is not a normal response if you are genuine)! Because, I am normal and I don't think about sex when I am upset.....I find this weak on his part. He only has one outlet for his emotions and I guess for most sociopaths the answer is sex. It's a physical way of dealing with emotional things. Do you agree? The real reason I ask is because, even empathy can be very sexual. We can be kinky with the right person. It may take some time, but we love the energy release and the intensity. On the other hand, sociopaths are like robots and it's almost laughable. He refuses to *** unless I do (because my ******* are his reward, not my reward). He would get so angry if he knew how many ******* I faked. I'm nobody's fool. I just don't need his pretend sulking and anger to come out. I've been keeping him around to learn more about myself! Something he cannot understand. My next question is....Do you ever take responsibility for anything? Obviously, you lie and your reactions to real life moments are always "OFF" (you give yourself away too easily, because you mimic only what you think to be an appropriate response)? Another question? ... Do you know how to define truth? Is truth something you take a guess at or do you actually know how to tell it? He lies about lying and nothing makes sense. If I find hard proof and evidence, he calmly says I'm crazy and that someone must be setting him up! This reaction from him is what starts most of our fights. I usually respond to him very rationally, "Well, high one is it? Is someone setting you up? And if so, who? OR am I crazy? Because those two separate things don't go together!" He always leaves. Thanks for your help......

My best friend was a sociopath (she was diagnosed as one by a therapist). When I initially met her I thought she was a little weird. But I was weird too. We were social outcasts I guess. So I ignored her weird behavior. Example. She'd talk in a choppy uneven stream. Often she'd repeat what she said said right after she finished. As in "Hey I like so and so they're really cool, let's hang out tomorrow." Then she'd say it again in a loop, "Hey I like so and so and so they're really cool, let's hang out tomorrow" she often mentioned her large array of "mental disorders" at first she only said that she had social anxiety disorder, which I believed without question. During this period she did seem to have some form of empathy. She seemed to like her dog Comet, and her cat (I don't think their name was ever mentioned.) But strangely they didn't like her one bit despite having grown up with her. She seemed to not know how to pet them. She'd just move her hand stiffly across their fur, with no love in the gesture at all. Her pets seemed to grow very attached to me. Whenever I came over her house they'd immediately run to me, (no joke).

I moved after a while. Although a few years later she began to talk to me online. We grew close again, much closer than before. I remember when I struggled with cooking out to my brother she was really comforting. She'd respond to my messages when asking for support or advice. She made sure that I felt secure. She used a lot of emoticons strangely and did not respond to my messages when I wasn't giving out my personal information or asking for advice. Which I thought was a little weird.

Then I remember when she said she had asbergers (self diagnosed). I thought yeah whatever. Then she said she had schizophrenia, later it was also depression. That's where I started to feel as if she was obsessed with self diagnosing or something. I openly doubted her by now, just sick her constant self-diagnosing. Hear me out, by now she's said she has social anxiety, asberger's, schizophrenia and depression at the same time, all
without any therapist actually diagnosing her.

Then she actually started seeing a therapist. Her therapist diagnosed her with sociapathy. Which I denied to myself at first but then I remembered how she talked about her cat. She'd mentioned how she said she was glad they were dying because they kept throwing up everywhere.

I remember how convincingly she made me think she cared. It was a little unnerving. She would seriously pretend that she cared about me. Whenever I was in a really bad mood she'd cheer me up somehow. But then the arguments started. She'd mention something and I'd criticize her about it and we'd go back and forth. Then she'd say horribly emotionally crippling things that she knew would wreck me. I remember she said that she "didn't give a damn about my feelings" She tore down my self-esteem really slowly. Until one night I attempted suicide and gladly failed in my attempt. I remember she mentioned that I should always be completely honest with her. So later on I mention it to her and she hardly responded. She gave me two-word responses and hardly talked to me.
Basically she'd had me develop a depenancy on her. I obsessed over her every word, she made me feel like everything was my fault. And nothing was EVER her fault. Always mine, and she manipulated me into thinking that was true. She used me just to get praise for her bad art that she hardly put effort into.

One day, when I was taking a little vacation she texted me after having hardly spoken to me for months. She told me everything. That it was all a lie. She said she'd faked all of her concern for ne. She never cared about me. She said that our friendship was just a sham. She said that she'll never talk to me again. That was the worst feeling I'd ever had. My alcohol addiction (that she'd told me wasn't an addiction at all before she ceased all contact with me) got even worse. I drank myself silly everyday. I became too scared to become friends with anyone. I'm just barely recovering now.

All sociopaths who see this. If you do in fact want to not hurt someone, please don't fake your emotions. Don't fake anything, because that will ultimately cause the people around you even more pain. I guess if I could explain emotional pain try to invision physical pain, but this is ten times worse, and you feel it all over you and not just in one spot but you feel it constantly. It's literally the worst thing anyone can experience. Just please try to put yourself in their shoes. Please don't fake anything, just be up front about everything.

I am not sure if the OP replied, but as someone similar to them, I will reply in their stead. I have been diagnosed with severe APD and sociopathy. I can tell you right now that your friend never had the intention to spare you harm. We all rarely do. You became useless for her, and so she took an aggressive initiative against you. Sociopaths can only be normal, caring people when they're faking. If she never faked anything, she would've never become your friend in the first place, I imagine. She probably only recruited you so you'd stroke her ego. I've done the same.

I am not saying this to hurt you at all. In fact, I offer my condolences. She did what she did consciously, and because she wanted you. Faking was how she got you as a friend in the first place. You falling into her web was rewarding up until the point she no longer benefited from you. One of the people I befriended became suicidal, and though I clearly displayed my intention to help, I think even lesser of them than I did before. It's just how we are. She likely felt even more victorious and superior from what she did to you. A very parasitic relationship.

Though we cannot technically place ourselves in anyone's shoes but our own, she probably fully understood your suffering and further fed off of it. It really is a peculiar thing.

Next time you find signs of sociopathy within anyone you encounter, drop them like a bad habit, and always be aware. Because we will not hesitate to exploit you and your feelings.

I wish you the best, and have a good evening.

i am a target as he put a main target he has madr me isolated he has threated my life. he wants complete control over me. he is not a dumb person he own his businesses hes young very good looking and so m i... its to the point were he wants to let me go but he wont he eez he wat ch ing he doesnt wantanyonr to have me hes saying he wabts me undayable i hate to say it but at this poimt im scared he will hurt me he has mafe it clear he wont let me go n everyone thinks hes okay smart charming. how do i notget killd please help me

I'm starting to realise that one of my best friends is a sociopath. We met this summer and clicked right away. I ended up spending a large part of the summer with him. He went to great lengths to do things for me and even said things that, when I thought about later, made me think he saw us getting married. My mom said she though he was a sociopath so I did the research and he fits the bill. My family has been hurt very badly by sociopaths at two different times so I'm a bit scared to keep being friends with him, but I've never been hurt by him so I'm not sure what to do. Is there a possibility that he might actually enjoy my company? Or is he just using me?

He is likely pulling you in to use you. Sociopaths only enjoy your company up until the point where they no longer have any use for you. We're parasites, and he will take whatever you have to give him. If he is not truly a sociopath, then that's good. Otherwise, to not fall prey to such charm. Trust me.

Of course your answer may not ne true, but what the hell. I believe my ex, only 2.wks., may be sociopathic. I texted him cruel words and demanded he NEVER contact me.again. Before our breakup, he.said he was confused and neede time to get himself together. He started out great an as I suspected cheating his behaviour abuse. 1 yr.together only. He insists he cares for me more than he has ever cared for anyone but is afraid to love again due to hurt. Is it possible that a person could be a psychological basketcase causeing symptoms that seem sociopathis? Is it likely that since I took control and cut him off, he may try to contact me again to re-establish control. Our sex life was explosive , the best he'd ever had. Positively. Does this up the chances? I want to get over this and turn him away AGAIN.

I'm a 15 year old girl and my mom thinks I'm a sociopath an I'mnot to sure wether I am or not, but first let me tell you my story. When I was three about a had a older friend she was also a girl, she was my only friend at the time. But one day we went be hind her shed and there were already other girls there and she wanted me to pull down my pants, everyone else did to. And well you can imagine what happens, I was so confused my mom never mentioned anything about my sexuality ( still to this day we don't speak anything like that, besides we've never been close) anyways so I turned to my brother, I showed him what she has done. And well he was a boy so that sparked something so that was a big mistake. I never told anybody else. So a couple years pasted and my brother that I showed what happens to we " fiddled" with each other but the weird part I initiated it, but not only with him my other older brother as well. And I was only five. And not to mention that's the time I first met my father, I slapped him across the face and broke his glasses for making my pb an j wrong, he did nothing though. And when I turned seven we lived in a small apartment in a complex, there were lots of children and of course I made friends with a much older girl actually two but the seconds one she made me do something so unconfertible, I never made friends with my own age. Oh and around this time is when my dad started to scare me he use to spank me and my brothers at first but then he use to kick us with his steal toed boots on. And my mother did nothing. We only could find comfert in our grandma. So when I turned nine, we have moved twice scince then. I had met a girl she was in the same class as me. And right away sexualy invovled , but I didn'treally care cause we acted like girlfriends. So that lasted a few years. She was always kinda abusive an controlling. But I was like a dog following her around doing what ever she wanted me do. And during this time was the worst abuse of all by my father. And only once my mother tried to help, that was when he chased me and I hide in the shower and he found me and turned on the cold water and sprade me down then left so Igot on his side of the bed and layed down, he got very angry and that's when my mom had to fight him off. When I was 12 they got a divorce thank god. But then we moved again to the worst trailer park in my town witch I didn't mind I liked it. But then sooner then I knew I was living with my dad! For eight months I absolutely hated there my "stepmother" and I hardly ever spoke, she didn't really like me. There has always been emotional abuse, by my farther. But Now I'm 13 and living with my mom with her boyfriend he done drugs like spice and pot and once in a while something else I don't know what. I didn't mind living there but it wasn't the best in fact he was super rude to my brother. But never me. He is a register sex a fender. He never touched me though. We lived with him for about a year. Now we moved its only me and my mom, and that's about it, I may have missed of things but all well. I am super awkward out in public and my doctor Evan thinks so. But when I'm at home I sometime drink and iI have smoked pot. Apparently I am super aggressive and I hit my mom pretty often when she makes me mad. I usually go back to what ever I'm doing. An I feel kinda good in a way after words. But I am vegan. (: I don't phisicaly harm animals it don't interest me. But sometimes I find my self yelling at my dog or making him feel worthless. But I really try to control that but ussualy it don't work. And not to mention, I have never had friends growing up in fact Ihardly spoke in sschool even preschool. Except for the ones I mentiond . so thats it.

You're not a sociopath. If you have to ask the question of whether you are a sociopath or not then you most likely aren't. You also don't come off as one in your description either.

I just learned what I am and I do not like it. Although I do have a girlfriend I've had for 3 years but I'm getting to where I can't stand her, from what I'm reading she has socio and phsycopathic behavior. We also have a child together but in all honestly I love him (i think)but only to a certain extent and it bothers me because a father should love his son more, I think that's how I became a sociopath. Niglect, bullying, and growing up with a bipolar foster sister who was emotionally abusive.(she's all better and medicated now.) deep down I want to treat him better but I feel as if I flipped a switch and if I'm pissed i will 360 it toward who I think deserves it. And the fact my girlfriend is a controlling phsyco, does not help my sociopathic behavior. The only reason I don't leave her *** is because I'm attached and we have a child, a car apartment ECT together and everytime I think of leaving her, I think of how hard it was to build up to it and it just don't want to do it again. Help please

You are not a sociopath. You are in an abusive relationship that you are afraid to leave probably because you are afraid of either being alone, ending up alone, or finding someone else who is just as much of a jerk as the girl you are with now.

If you were a sociopath, you wouldn't let someone else control you. You would be in control. You wouldn't worry about your child or your girlfriend because they would just be objects to you. You would just leave. Sociopaths lack empathy and are impulsive. You are neither.

You need to seek help. If you can't afford it, try to find a low cost clinic near you or some kind of a crisis center. It seems like you want to leave but you are scared to do it. I think you are just emotionally hurt, confused and lost. You need to figure out a plan to ditch this girl and get a custody hearing so that you can have access to your child. I think you feel like you don't love your kid "as much as you should" because you see him as an extension of your girlfriend, who you don't seem to like at all. That is probably why you are not very nice to him. You seem like you are scared to take your anger out on your gf so you do it to the kid because he is an easy target. It's like if you get yelled at by your boss all day and come home and kick the dog. You need to get out now before you destroy your relationship with your son. Again, you are not a sociopath but you definitely need psychiatric help.

My 15 year old daughter has been dating this 16 year old boy for 7 months. Recently he decided to dump her and she kept her distance, even though he killed her heart. Now, after a month he is back and he says he doesn't want to lose her. He wanted to have sexual relationships with her but she didn't, that's the reason why I think he left. Why is he back? I'm so worried... Should she have taken him back.? What should she expect from his comeback?
Help please, a very worried Mom :{

All kids go through a few phases of sociopathic behavior driven by hormones.
I would say he probably got pissed he wasn't getting any and tried to look some place else and got shut down again. Knowing he had made progress with your daughter he tried to go back to her... emotional memories can be accessed and manipulated pretty easily with the help of hormones to pull off some crazy things (like a horny 16 year old in tears 'cause he loves her')...

agree with this. he probably just wants to get laid. isn't that like the main objective of teenage boys? blech i don't miss high school...

I know this is going to sound harsh but just try to listen: Teenagers are idiots (seriously, look it up, the brain doesn't finish fully developing until your mid twenties) and they love to get involved with other idiot teenagers. I know it sucks to see someone you love get involved with another person who is probably just going to hurt them but the best thing you can do is put her on the pill so if she decides to have sex with this boy (which she obviously shouldn’t, but whatever) she doesn't get knocked up and ruin her life. There isn't a whole lot you can do about it. She might be your daughter but you cannot control her life and if you try to she will hate you for it and might (probably will) do whatever she wants anyway. Encourage her to talk to her friends since they probably hate this boy as much as you do for hurting her and teenagers listen to their friends more than their parents. Be there for her but don't push her in any direction because that will just push her away. Hopefully they will break up again and she will learn from this what kind of boy to look out for. That's kind of what being a teenager is - pretending to be an adult with a safety net so you can learn and not epically screw up your life when it actually counts. I don't mean this to sound harsh but I'm a lot closer to my teenage years than you and I dated A LOT of idiot boys and I was an idiot teenager myself. Just try to be there for her and keep her safe and not pregnant. I don't think any kid is a sociopath by any means - boys just take a lot longer than girls to develop any kind of empathy and many of them just follow their pants around and turn off their brain. Hopefully having her heart broken a second time will teach her to find the other kind of boy.

I am going on 4.5 years of living with a sociopath and it has been one hell of a ride. He left his wife and moved right into my house, and moved his two children in a few days later. His children were 16 and almost 11 at the time. The first night his kids were there he had to lay down with his 11 year old because that is the only way she could fall asleep. Needless to say, I fell victim to his lies and allowed him to convince me to move into his house because it was more affordable. Big mistake but hind sight is 20/20. Anyways, the behavior of him sleeping with his 11 year old was a bit disturbing to me, he continued sleeping with her until she fell asleep. On one occasion I opened her bedroom door up to find her legs wrapped around his body as though they were a couple. He did not like me calling him out on this behavior that still to this day I find disturbing so he reacted by going to the courts and getting a restraining order against me that was full of nothing but lies. Stupid me let him woo me over again. Unfortunately life only got worst with him. His daughter started reacting to our relationship in some odd ways. She started stealing not only my dirty underwear but my 2 daughters dirty underwear,one being 4 yrs old and the other being 16. Somehow the sicko tried making us all believe we deserved this filthy behavior and that we had to have been molested to think there was anything wrong with her doings. In his words...his daughter is perfect and would never do such a thing. I let it go until 3 weeks later when I was putting her laundry in her room to find 86 more stolen items. Nothing was done about the thieving going on except my children and I being made to think we deserved it. She was praised and went to a friends house a few blocks away for a week...never a consequence for her. About 6 months later his daughter called the local police, where my sister happened to be the dispatcher, and claimed that her dad had been touching her and raping her since she was in diapers. That evening her mom was granted temporary custody and they fled to a safe house. He was not home at the time so I called him to find out why his ex was at the house and his daughter was hauling trash bags of clothes out..i was instantly blamed..what did i do? I knew i did nothing and I was onto his blame game. Needless to say he had his ways of tracking them down in the safe house and got through to his daughter telling her nothing she did was wrong and that he "needed" her. She was found to be lying yet he continuously praised her and told her how perfect she was. He has caused so much damage to his own child that she would sit in her room and cut herself and write down her suicidal thoughts. On numerous occasions I found satanic pictures drawn by her often reflecting her death wishes for me. It was then that i realized that this man cared about nobody but himself. I would have found professional help or found someone for my children to talk to...not him...he shipped her off to live with her mother after her mother was deemed too mentally challenged to have any type of visitation that wasn't supervised. His kid was nothing but an ob<x>ject to him...just no longer his welfare ticket (which he lied to get benefits that he should not have qualified for, he claims the government owes him for the 10 years he served in prison for attempted murder charges). Unfortunately this man has done nothing but set his own kids up for failure. The relationship we had was ba<x>sed on lies and more lies. It was a hard decision to make, his words were pretty convincing even though the big picture was there. He tried to get everyone around me to dislike me by telling lies about me. He had no luck as the people he was targeting were onto his ways. His last blow and the one that proved the depths he would go to try to gain any kind of control over me or try to make me feel so worthless was him hiring my ex and trying to throw my past in my face...not sure if he thought he was accomplishing anything other than me realizing how deep the issues are. I am thankful I never let him beat me down to the point that I let him have control. He knows we are through yet all he can say is "well i love you unconditionally"...sociopaths don't love...I've been loved before and this nightmare was anything but love. Run away as fast as you can if you cross paths with an individual like this and don't let them think they won. It's quite humorous when they realize u quit their game

That is the most disturbing story I've heard. How disgusting and repulsive. Hell is real and that monster of pig is heading there for some good old fashioned torture.

This guy is not a sociopath, he is a ********* which is a type of paraphilia. You should have called the police or tried to talk to his daughter when you noticed the inappropriate behavior. I know that is harsh, but often kids continue to be raped and molested because the adults in their life look the other way and don't take action.

His lies and manipulation are due to his paraphilia. He needs a woman in his life to appear like he has a normal relationship so that his sexual perversions are less likely to come up or come into question. Plus having a woman in his life makes it easier for him to have custody of children, giving him easier access to hurt them. In his sick mind he believes he really does love and care about the child he is molesting. He knows that it is wrong most likely but feels like he "can't control himself."

All this guy cares about his is sick perversions - it is like an addiction to him. You see sociopathic behavior like this in drug and alcohol addicts as well. It is all about feeding the addiction but he is likely not a sociopath. Stay away from this guy and do what you can to help his kids.... the writing you found in her room and the fact that she was stealing undergarments are a cry for help. IMHO she is not lying about her dad raping her since she was a baby but is scared to stand up to him because it is probably all she has ever known. He probably shipped her off because she was too close to cracking and spilling his dirty secret. I know you felt hurt by her but honestly I feel terrible for her since she has obviously been the most hurt by her own father.

hopefully you can figure out what i called that guy by the rest of my post - i didn't curse i just typed out the word for someone who hurts children in a sexual way and it censored it.

Could a sociopath hold more value on a person for having a son? Or is the initial novelty and attention that comes with a new baby what's most appealing and when the time for actually taking care of the baby comes will they run?

I am also a sociopath. I have learned to fake emotions like yourself, but unlike you avoid people. The only true emotion I feel is pure hatred. I try to adapt to society, but can't grasp why people act the way they do. While I know how to fake the more simplistic emotions (happiness, sadness, anger, etc.) I have no idea how to fake the more complex (love, grief, sympathy,etc.). I am very charismatic, and have been diagnosed a sociopath, but am unable to truly fit into society. While I have no real desire to fit into society today, my life will be easier if I did "fit in". Any suggestions?

I'd also like to edit, the average sociopath is not a serial killer. Most killers are psychopaths as they are more impulsive than sociopaths. If most sociopaths were killers, then many more people would be serial killers. The average sociopath is hiding, not a killer.

I'm diagnosed above average so here's my take. It's who you are. Accept it and enjoy the ride. Keep winning the game and enjoying the rewards.

I think I might be best friends with a sociopath. Ive known him for about 4 years. We are 16 years old and he hasnt been diagnosed but ive done quite alot of research and all the signs point to him being sociopathic including very high charisma, he is basically the most popular kid in our age group and everyone follows him around. Hes never sorry when he hurts someone including me. He never takes responsabilty for his actions. When I argue with him for something he clearly did he uses pure logic to get out of it even though he clearly is the one responsable. He says im his best friend and all and I think hes mine to but ever since we became close friends the relationship has felt hallow. He is always lying and overexagerating stories and I will believe him because hes so good at lying but then he will just say a few minutes later that it wasnt true and he doesnt know why he lied. He does this alot. He thinks he is smarter then everyone. He rarely does anything for me out of the kindness of his heart but I do alot. Is this how sociopaths are? Should I confront him or ask some of mine and his friends to try and get him help? Should I stay friends with him? Can he get better through treatment if he does get help?

I hate to break it to you dude but therapy or other types of help will not assist him if he is truly a sociopath. There is no way that science has come up with to help sociopaths "grow" empathy. There are no effective treatments known at this time. It is your choice to stay friends with him or not, but he won't "get better," that simply doesn't happen for people with personality disorders. I would suggest doing more research on the subject. Either way he cannot be legally diagnosed with Antisocial Personality Disorder (the real name given by the DSM for sociopathy) until he is 18. If I were you, I would stay on my guard around him. If it becomes obvious that he is emotionally draining you and it becomes a threat to your personal well-being, if only emotionally or mentally, then you will need to slowly distance yourself from him - it is much harder to suddenly cut off a relationship with a sociopath than it is to slowly creep away from them. This will give him time to find a new person to use. Again this is up to you, but stay on your guard. He may never use you in this way but then again he may decide to suddenly do so.

Good luck.

<p>He always said don't hurt me. After years of horrid emotional abuse and promises of a good life, I exposed him. I'm sure he hates me now. With nowhere to go he finaly checked himself into Rehab.</p>What will happen next?

There is no cure for being a sociopath. It is considered a mental disorder, but has no cure, no fix. Likely the emotions will continue to be faked, more efficiency. I know from experience, but rehab won't help. It is who he his, and by trying to literally change something that is unchangeable will just make things worse.

I need help protecting myself from a sociopath who is a regular at the bar I work at. I was seeing him for about two months and started to see warning signs. I was with a sociopath for five years. I am a little in fear and I don't want to loose my job. Because I have been through this before I already know people are going to have trouble believing me.

So what you're saying is... at best my boyfriend who demands he loves me could just feel an attachment towards me?

Also... how do I leave him?

I dont expect easy... I just want to be safe.

What happens if you try to break up with a sociopath ? He knows I am unhappy and I've caught him cheating and is constantly telling me I'm the crazy one . Every time I try to break up , it's more I love yous . If he wants to cheat why does he have to be in a relationship? And why does the charm go back to the way it was in the beginning , also the sex was great and now it's like I have to beg for it. I just don't get it, please help.

What would you do to hurt a narcissist when the narcissist tried to claim all the pride from the jobs that you've done?
Or, what would you do to counter against another sociopath?

I have not been diagnosed with any mental abnormality of any kind, granted I have never talked to a talked to a doctor. Starting early during infancy, I was intrigued in causing pain. I started torturing my toys at the age of 3-4. I got great pleasure out of it, for awhile. I got bored with it as I aged. By the time I was around five, my mother bought a cat that was pregnant at the time. The cat had a litter of kittens and lets just say I wasn't bored for awhile. My mother found out what I was doing with the kittens so she ended up giving them away instead of seeking them, I was left bored again. I starts moving on to my brother and mother. My father was not in the picture because he was a con-artist, and was in and out of prison and had numerous ex wives and many kids to take care of. I've never seen him. Anyways as I moved on to my brother, I began testing him and trying to figure out my limitations and what exactly I could do and try to constantly push the limits emotionally. Shortly after I started, a close relative of mine died, my mother and brother were mourning the death of him. While I was looking at them trying to understand what was going on. Granted I was about 8 years of age, I joined in with them, tried to copy my brother. I slowly got good at showing the emotion I had practiced that now I can cry on the spot. I have had 4 relationships, all of which ended but I still have control of them. They all think I love them and I tell them exactly what they need to hear to keep them around. I have 7 different families who all consider me family and would do what ever I want them to do at the drop of a hat. Although I fantasize about killing people, it would be inconvenient to be locked up in prison where I had no control over my things. I don't care to much about being diagnosed, I'm simply curious as to what you think about my life.

I recently learned someone at the office is a sociopath. Where do I go from here?

Do I confront and set boundaries around our interactions?
Do I avoid/play along in an emotionally diffusing way?
Should I pretend I don't know? Is it better if they know I know or worse?
Also, do sociopaths see people in varying degrees of likeability or is every person weighted/treated the same?

Just wondering how you learned that they were a sociopath? It seems to be a label tossed around freely and inaccurately.

Someone they hurt and got away researched what happened for weeks. I've seen and heard about their experiences, coupled with my own experiences, and that of one other person, plus general observations of behavioural patterns, I see on a daily basis.

hello, i have sent you a message, please respond

My mom, some of my friends, my dad, my housemates, my ex-boyfriends all told me I had sociopathic tendencies. I admit that I lie, a lot. Mostly to get out of trouble or make myself look better than I am. I have manipulated so many people to get what I want, but then who hasn't. I have broken men down. I sometimes act selfishly. When I say I'm sorry, I mean it. I would never use the word lightly. I know when I should and shouldn't feel sorry. Yet, I get screamed at because, "you're not sorry at all! You're a lying little ****." When my dad was ill I was by his side every day. When he died I didn't cry. I handled everyone that day he died, and watched them cry and smash things, and storm out the house. And then I got told off because "you don't care." I went upstairs, I saw my dad in my mind, and I cried and cried. And I wake up every morning saying I miss him. And when I need to talk about it all, everyone bottles it up, so I can't let my emotions out. My mom thinks that I don't really love her. I never hugged her as a child. I never talked to her as a child. And growing up I was difficult. My dad wold ask me why I never hugged mom. In my memories I remember mostly talking to my mom. I remember hugging her when she put plasters on my knees because I fell off my bike, and how I used to tell her I loved her. My friends talk at Uni talk about me behind my back and say I'm a manipulator, and a loner. I admit I don't love for the right reasons. I want to be in love with someone I can fix, because I can't fix myself, and no body will help me. It's selfish of me, but also selfless of me. I feel love. I feel regret. I feel anger, sadness, happiness sometimes, and I feel jealous just like any body. I have tried to kill myself 3 times now. I am obviously not that good at it, and I obviously don't want to do it, because I'd have been dead by now. Every time I was saved, I'd say, "I don't really want to die. I couldn't let that destroy my mother and the rest of my family." Even though I think it's selfish that they'll act badly if I do kill myself, I also know it's selfish to relieve myself from the world.
In all honesty, the term hurts. I am with a sociopath who truly understands me, yet I know he exploits my weaknesses. I can read him like a book, and he knows it. He's become nervous of me. Tries to tell me I am the sociopath, not him, when confronted on his personality flaws.
I am a desperate, suicidal girl. I am 20, and I have felt this way since I was about 10. My family, my friends and others have all turned their backs on me because I have no "love" or "compassion". I can't help but feel I need to help children who are ill. When I see them in hospital, it breaks my heart that some have no hope.
Yet this is all an act apparently. Is everyone around me trying to make me kill myself? Are some of my family sociopaths? Or are they all just ignorant because they'd rather it be a disorder, than just because I am genuinely unhappy in this world? Because no parent, no friend, no co-worker wants to see that truth. That for some, living is not an option.
I truly respect sociopaths. I love my boyfriend. He makes me unhappy, but I love him. At least with him, there is no feeing. And I wish that I didn't have to feel. I wish I didn't have to be hurt by the people I love. I wish everyone was right about me.

No. I said I didn't feel I had sociopathic tendencies. That is what everyone tells me I am. I am completely the opposite. Yes, I have flaws just like all humans :) I just have a hard time in my own head, but I certainly feel. If it were a diagnosis, I'd believe it.
I have no support. Not because people don't care. Because they are afraid of me. And some they are just too busy in their world. And that's not a bad thing.
I seem intelligent only because I have been taught how to seem intelligent by others. Not because I actually am. I'm incredibly irrational.

>>>"When I say I'm sorry, I mean it. I would never use the word lightly." --- You have Borderine Personality Disorder written all over you. Your parents, housemates and whoever else are simply ignorant if you're telling the truth in this post. Manipulative but you feel REMORSE - BPD. Not to mention, everything else you said screamed out BPD.

Hi Amanda, I joined the group specifically so I could respond to you. You are NOT a sociopath. You do not suffer from Borderline Personality Disorder. If had HAD to give a label for this situation I would say you might be co-dependant. I believe from what you have written that you are being abused by your family. You might even be the family scapegoat. I'm sorry these people are making you doubt yourself. That alone is evidence that you are not what they accuse you of being. Research co-dependency, it may help. If anyone in your family drinks too much, try attending Alanon Family Groups. It might help. Best of luck <3


Mental issues are tricky things to deal with. They are by no means insurmountable, but if you’re going to try to tackle one head on, you’re going to need support and empathy and and compassion from the people around you, and you’re going to want to get help from somebody who knows the condition inside and out—and I’m sad to say that, apart from a few exceptions, that’s not what you’re going to get on this thread. No--if you come here looking for support, you will almost certainly not receive the advice and understanding you need; just a lot of recrimination and hot air.

When push comes to shove, the truth is that most people—myself very much included—don’t really know what they’re talking about when it comes to mental health. If you need advice, it’s better to talk to a licensed physician with years worth of study under their belt than to some guy who gets all his knowledge about psychology from Law and Order—and if you need support, it’s better to talk to somebody whom you trust and who cares about you than to some random guy on a message board.

Good luck—and take care.

Not all sociopaths are sociopaths, per se, lol. There is such a thing as sociopathic tendencies, and there certainly is such a thing as a sociopath with narcissism, with or without varying degrees of tendencies of either.

Incidentally, not all sociopaths victimize innocent people. There are some that only hunt other sociopaths - more points. Sociopaths who prey on the innocent are not challenging themselves enough.

Challenge accepted!