Sociopathic Love

I feel like if I took 5 minutes to search around this website that I could find someone else talking about this particular topic, but this route seems to be easier and should provide the more personalized results that I am looking for.

I have been in 8 relationships in the past 5 years. Each of them lasting close to 3 or 4 months with the exception of a year or so relationship.

I am currently in the most complex relationship I have ever been in. In the past I used and manipulated the other girls. I know that's the vague description of a "sociopath from wikipedia" so let me elaborate. I dated 3 of the 8 before my birthday just so they would buy me a gift, then dumped them. 1 of the girls had a thing about "Love" she wouldn't admit she was in love with me until she was sure. I saw this as a challenge as I'm sure many of you would, I waited and molded into the perfect partner for her until she said "I love you" I stopped talking to her and dumped her the week after. The other girl I toyed with until she was so hurt she went to my "best friend' who is also a sociopath and I let him **** her. Another girl was head over heels about me, but I hated her. I stopped talking to her after a month into the relationship. Was able to keep the relationship going for 3 months with an occasional text message. And I cheated on 2 of the girls.

I have this strange ability, that even I marvel at, to make girls feel incredibly attached to me. To the point that they cry a year later. It makes me incredibly and immeasurably happy.

Sorry about the rambling, this is my first "post" and I wanted to boast.

I am now in a relationship that I used hardly any of my usual manipulative tactics. I was "honest"; to a degree. We have been through a lot to make this relationship work. It was amazing. I feel amazing about her, she is brilliant. I've come close to admitting she is smarter than me sometimes.
I outed myself to her. It's not the first time i have admitted being a sociopath to someone in my life. My "best friend" and a childhood friend I still talk to.

I just want to know. Is it possible for you to love someone? I know this is love, I have tried to trick myself into believing Love before and I know that was a lie. This is love and I need to know that others have felt it too.

Also feel free to include any escapades of your own. Relationships-wise
From this description, my name and my picture. Any one close to me could figure out who I am. I thought it would add excitement to being honest.
JasonGrayson JasonGrayson
18-21, M
12 Responses Feb 6, 2013

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you do sound like a sociopath with the extent of manipulation that went on and then slam shut relationship done. an actual plain jerk off wouldn't take it that far.

you're probably just a ****-head, not a sociopath. you're probably in love with her.

Well you don't have to be a sociopath to not find true love after meeting and dating a few people. When you do find that someone special you just know it and feel it. I fell in love with two sociopaths but with me to be honest I was the love of their lives. The first one I met, I was in my twenties. I had no idea that he was a sociopath but I figure he was now because everything that came out of his mouth was a lie or like he was living a fantasy in his mind. The second sociopath I had no idea what a sociopath was but I prayed for over 1 year and I then found this out and I believe God led me to know this. I know God led me to know this. No man, sociopath or not, will ever make a fool out of me never so I got him back good for doing something behind my back but he still is in love with me. I know he is and I care about him too but after I read about sociopaths I am rather amazed. I think his wife mistreated him to so that made him worse. I think she may have had a drinking problem. Their is a lot of baggage right now though in his life so I just leave it in God's hands. I am not desperate at all and will just put my faith in God before anything because nothing in life is guaranteed and God is my only real hope for the best future.

You do realize by definition if they were sociopaths they don't love you whatsoever

You'll be happy to know that you can't love at all; however, we can get something that is our own version of love which is a combination of other feelings or opinions. I don't know much about it but you certainly can have a specific appreciation for a person which is strong enough you may as well consider it love, or at least the sociopathic version of it. You can feel attached enough to want to stay with someone without feeling whatever love is.

Most of the girls you are talking about are those with masochistic tendencies and are addicted to people who toy with them. I have also the same ability you are talking about. Another thing I want to tell you is that our witholding is a huge turn on for them.This is due to the fact that we are far far far more mentally and even physcially stronger than the average person and once they see that we have many options, they get attracted to us.

I have no idea if it's possible to love. I've apparently tried to convince myself I cared before but it all fell through. They say you grieve a person as much as you love them. Well, when I broke up with people, the most I gave were crocodile tears ahaha
then I forgot about them the next day because I'd usually got what I wanted out of the relationship consciously or subconsciously. I decided it's a moot pursuit and to focus on other things though

At the time of the relationship though did you feel as though you were in love? or were they petty relationships and you went in knowing you would screw them over?

I was curious about what would happen and if it was possible that I could fall in love. I went into it people collecting, knowing dating can be fun, not keen on the whole physical intimacy thing, but I didn't care. I didn't think I was in love. I said I was, though. I'll never be sure.

Yup, this summarizes myself and relationships. A third person tried to reprimand me for being callous and I wrote it off as being none of their business.

The only man I have ever loved is a diagnosed psychopath. I knew it when I became involved with him. I myself have been diagnosed with psychopathic tendencies, but my main dx is BP1. I've wondered myself if perhaps it's actually histrionic personality disorder, but I have no interest in pursuing labels.
He was my dark prince and he loved me too. We were perfect for a year and a half, engaged. Eventually I think he resented that I saw through any attempt of manipulation and knew when he was lying and he pushed me away.
It's wonderful to be your true self with someone. He still loves me but it was too intense for him. Now he is with a dumb blonde who can pay his mortgage and car payments and never see who he really is.
It's just easier I guess. I have a strong desire to destroy the situation, which I am contemplating. He broke my heart. I didn't know that was possible. He's not happy. That thought comforts me, but I'm not sure what will happen to dumbass Barbie. We shall see.

I really need help figuring out if my bf is a sociopath. I am tired of reading websites about the traits. I need to know from a real sociopath. I genuinely love my bf. We have been through really hard times and really great times. He is currently seeing a psychologist so he has not been diagnosed yet. I feel like he is able to love. But I am so confused because I do not know if he is able to feel guilty about things. I've been trying to ask him lately because i think he is one. I did get the answer from him that he ha never regretted anything in his life. He is a complete thief. He is never afraid to steal and does not feel bad about it even when there are cameras; at his parents house they have cameras everywhere and he will still break into their room! He is very romantic and loves to brag about me being his gf. He likes the show, pictures posted everywhere etc. He is very dangerous especially when driving. There are so many things about him i just get so exhausted. But I think he is a good person deep down. And I really care and love him. Is there anything I can do to help him?

Don't know why I even bothered responding. Well you sound like a lovely person, I do however have one problem with you. You asked if you could do anything to help him, he doesn't need your help because there is nothing wrong with him. Oh yeah, I think he is a sociopath yes. It is usually very hard to tell through hearsay but he sounds a lot like me. Btw the showing you off and bragging about you, I do that when I'm with a girl that I hate, when I actually care about the girl I'm a lot less public about it. But then again that's a personal preference.
Honestly if you think he loves you I would leave it alone. If he does care about you he might actually tell you himself, if you feel like he is manipualting "get out quick and save yourself" er something.

The only relationship that worked for me was with another sociopath. I think I am the top dog in relationship but I wonder if it is because he lets me be one? Paranoia. First few years were all out war, but we settled into a nice flow I think. Having some one who doesn't constantly pester you with where have you been and who was that person you were talking to is a relief. Not having some one constantly asking for attention is also great. And the sex is amazing, because we can push each others adrenaline buttons without a fear of some emotional outburst. I still enjoy outside of the home play, but it is nice to have a partner in crime. Some one who a) gets you and b) can keep up with you. Although I must be honest, it's not love. Attachment I think is a too strong word for it, we are both in this as long as it works for us and we both know it. I think understanding and common goals is what keeps us together. There are people out there who do earn my respect and I don't feel like 'playing' them. But that is rare.

Yes she is like that. She is incredibly intelligent. She actually caught me at one of my games its kind of how we met. She doesn't do the usual pestering of an annoying girlfriend and she allows us to be together without the label of boyfriend and girlfriend because I really hate it for some reason. She never gets jealous, and when she does she never voices it.
We have a good dynamic.

But they way you worded that, the "Attachment" I think is actually pretty accurate. I'm not sure how long this love will last and I am fairly certain I won't be moping around and depressed when it's over.

Maybe you genuinely care about her...did that cross your mind? Because your way of thinking might eventually lead to you wondering if she is playing the game you played with those other girls which leads to basically a mind ****

Well yes, of course. genuine isn't a word I often use to describe anything about me.
Yes i am incredibly paranoid and the fact that we both admitted to each other that we tried to play games with each other scares me.

That's always going to be there...I'm no one to give advice considering my situation but you care about her and because you aren't used to that feeling it is normal but it's how you react to that that'll make a difference

I am a sociopath and I have great loves, not like spouses i loved, but concepts and causes, but it is still love none the less.

I mean personal love for the one person. Actually feeling a pain when they're gone and wanting to be with them.
I'm even waiting for sex like a normal person. It's scaring me how much I care about this woman.

I have never loved another single person so I cannot relate, can you empathize with her?

No. Love is the only emotion that I feel towards her or us....
she knows I can't empathize so she doesn't really open up to me with that kind of stuff anymore.

oh. and I would be.. "upset" if she died.

sounds to me like you love her like a kid loves his xbox, he only loves it for selfish reasons, I may be wrong though so don't think I am saying this is the way it is, just speculating.

No you're probably right. er, I hope you're right because I hate this "feeling" thing

Even with my previous relationships when I didn't care at ALL about the girl. I still got jealous.
not for any emotional reason, but it was as if someone was trying to seize my possessions.

you hate feeling? I love feeling, but to each is own, if you hate it then stop, that would be the most logical recourse.

It freaks me out. Creates needed vulnerabilities.

yes I know that stopping would be the most logical, but it's these ******* feelings, I don't want to stop.

Thanks for the insight.

do some research into the brain and nervous system functions behind what you are feeling, scientifically dismantling it can help you realize what and why is going on and cope with it, or it helps me atleast

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