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I Don't Want to Be a Sociopath

There are some real fuggin brain dead idiots on here that are bragging about how "antisocial" they are like its somehow cool. Let me tell you something. Its not cool. I watch with dead eyes the devastation I cause in people's lives. These are good people that never see me coming. I'm not a pure psychopath that sets to con and cheat. It just happens.

I'll whirlwind through your life and leave you so spun you won't know what hit you. Is that bragging? No its unbelievable that I am capable of doing this kind of sh--. My current girlfriend I have been with for six years. I have "borrowed" over $30,000 from her mother. I even borrowed another ten thousand in her mom's name because I conned her into giving me her past years tax refund so I could review it. I feel bad about that.. kinda. Actually I just feel bad about the repurcussions.

I own a business that is seasonal and does well but when the winter comes around you don't think I am going to hold a phuckin mundane job for $12/hr do you? So my girlfriend pays my rent, gets me food and keeps me afloat until the weather breaks when I can bill $1500 per day for services. Oh yeah, my girlfriend gave me her inheritance from when her grandmother died so I could buy the equipment. I meant to pay her back.. I really did.

 

owww, I just felt a twinge of remorse.. okay its gone now..

 

I've convinced everyone in my life that I am an IVY league business graduate. Lawyers, therapists, judges.. I've spun all of them at some time or another. The last judge caught onto me though after my third jailing for contempt to pay child support. I owe $50,000 in back support and haven't spoken to my kids in 6 years. They live about 5 miles from me. Their good kids. its a shame I cannot attach to them like normal people. I mean I think I love them but do fathers do this? I feel nothing. I hope they do well but I don't cry or feel an emptiness. Instead of giving them anything last year, I wnet to Vegas and dropped $10,000.

 

I've done drugs, took steroids, post incessantly on business forums.. all to get some type of gratification that never comes. I'm a dangerous person. Not because I will rape you, hurt your children or hold a gun to your head. What i am is much more insidious. I will come to you with the $13,000 I put into my smile, a feigned kindness and ability to listen. I will let you tell me your problems as I make a mental checklist of those things when I will need them later to exploit you.

 

Do I need to go on? This is a fuggin sociopath. This is what I am. I'm a scumbag you better pray never comes into your life.

Edit: Interesting after two years people are still finding, reading and commenting. 2 years later and I am still me though I have mellowed a bit and come to a realization.. I don't really need to con that much. Just because I cannot feel does not mean I have to be a liar. Its just become easier to tell the truth. I have made it a goal to pay eveyone back (and I have). I've settled back taxes and child support is up to date. Business if good and life seems good. So I'll flash a big smile to everyone and well pretend I am happy. At the very least, I'm not unhappy.   ;-)

DeceivinglyCharming DeceivinglyCharming 41-45 60 Responses Jun 28, 2009

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I don't know where I fit in and yes I brag about being antisocial not because it is cool but because I dislike everyone around me. I been dealing with thoughts since I was a kid on harming others. There are things I did to kids my age when I was a child. Am I proud of it no...Do I feel bad...no I do not. I have a bf who lives with me and I had no regards to his feelings we been together for 6 years if he left me 2 years ago I would of never even glanced. I am trying to control them I don't want help by a psychologist he tried to help me once...I flat out lied to him so he would never get to the root of it. He assumed I was still grieving from 21 years ago when my father died when I was 10. I only have two friends in my life..The girl that is my friend I made her cry by telling her she meant nothing to me I smiled in her face and she ran away from me crying then I continued to sip my tea. I am not bragging about any of this but it seemed like a good of time as any to finally open up about it. Not sure how to control it but I am researching it I just found out that I fit into being a Sociopath.

I have a split personality disorder, so in a sense I suppose I have both the best and worst of both worlds, I unlike you I can feel emotion, and on very very rare occasions love... But it all depends on who I am at that moment. Each side hates the other, hates what it can or can't feel, and what it can, or can't do.. While I agree 100% that being a sociopath isn't something cool, it can be useful.. and I suppose that if I can ever really learn to control both sides then maybe it would be kind of cool? I don't really know.. all I know right now is that as you said, I come in like a whirlwind, seem to help, and in actuality destroy the lives of everyone I come into contact with.. Unfortunately for the other side he feels such intense remorse that lately I've found it easier to be me.. or it.. or whatever. I honestly think maybe death would be cleaner for those around me.. But I digress, if you can find some form of structure in your life, that perhaps it would be better to hold on for awhile longer.. at least to see if I can do the same.

Rather you are a sociopath or not you are still an adult. You can do everything in dignity.

I have no clue what I am. For a long time I just wanted to hurt people and I never ever cried. I felt joy from manipulating people. I seemed so perfect to everyone around me too, but the things in my head were so messed up. Then, I sort of stopped wanting to hurt others and started wanting to hurt myself. For the next three years I never stopped thinking about suicide. I would just stare at knives, wondering what it would be like if I got the courage. I was getting drunk everyday. I also would start bawling sometimes, but only for myself. When my dog died I didnt cry. When my uncle died I didnt cry. But when I didnt get my way I would scream and cry, in private of course. Now after two visits to the mental hospital, my depression and anxiety are under control. But the crazy thing is that now I want to hurt others again. Also, I am talking to myself a lot and I am getting so angry sometimes. Of course, no one else knows what I am thinking in my head and thank god they dont. Also, I have these delusions of grandeur. I will just lay in my bed thinking about all these situations, totally impossible, where I am dictator of the world or some **** like that and when I am thinking these thoughts, I actually believe they could happen. I am sort of a sexual deviant too I guess. People would despise me If they knew the truth about me. I don't hate myself though, I am simply confused by myself. It's really hard not knowing who I am.

Guilt and shame can be very painful experiences, it is understandable why you want to avoid such pain especially if you would feel that your remorse would not bring you comfort from loved ones because you learned so well to detach emotionally. You try desperately to get your needs met, and try to avoid pain, or the feeling of not having control, which means you would be vulnerable. Ultimately all your attempts leave you still unhappy.

I'm not a sociopath, at least I've never been diagnosed with it. I have been diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia. I hear voices all day long even with my meds. No one believes me besides the specialists because I seem normal. So they criticize my smoking and drinking and eating which I do the remain calm. If I lash out I get punished.

I'm extremely selfish. It's a defense mechanism. It doesn't pay to be nice. I use people. Gives me energy.

Everyone in my culture is fixated on racism. They push everything else to the backburner. So I don't feel validated. Now that's the perfect excuse to carry on using people. The tables have turned. Good feeling.

My father was an alcoholic, a wife beater, and a philanderer and deadbeat. I'm like him. I commit adultery, I'm promiscuous, etc. I'm glad he's dead. I'm also glad my grandfather is dead because he was scary.

From my online research psychosis must be absent to be diagnosed as a sociopath. If you are very curious ask a doctor, a therapist or go look it up at the library.

You have clear signs of guilt, remorse and empathy, not a Sociopath....

It's not cool to be a Sociopath...but if you are a REAL Sociopath, you will learn to accept it, Hide it, love it...and use it to your advantage! :)

Great posts. Its nice to see that there are so many people who are trying to help themselves and others by reaching out while keeping their comfort of their anonymity. I wish I would've searched for something like this forum sooner. It probably would've benefitted much more when I was a teen.

First off, I don't believe that we are all monsters. It isn't cool to have these disorders and I would never wish them on anyone. There are varying degrees to the severity of our need to manipulate and control. Some of us do it more for survivial and others for selfish reasons. Regardless, if you're reading these posts you want help and want to feel normal.

I don't believe there is or ever will be a "cure" for this and similar disorders but I do believe that if self-controlled, it isn't a problem. I imagine that most of us with social disorders, think of life and interactions with others more of a chess game. Every move well planned and thought out. Just like any natural talent or skill, we can use our abilities beneficially. As long as what we do isn't damaging to ourselves or others. Since, there is a lack of emotions we are able to make decisions based on reason (hopefully). Just like Stan Lee said, "With great power comes greater responsibility."

We already mimic the people we have come in contact with. Applying our learned linguistics and body language we are able to mold ourselves into what we want others to see. Since we have no true identity of self and usually above average intelligence why not mimic people we believe are decent human beings? Think of yourself as water taking shape of the container you fill. If the illusion constructed benefits you and others around you then it can truly be good. Now whether or not there is any satisfaction or that void being filled within yourself I am unsure but, at least innocent people aren't being hurt in the process. I have been trying to live this way for a couple of years and it has helped me tremendously with understanding myself and not feeling like a wolf in sheep's clothing.

It may be overwhelming trying to create this person overnight so try weening off the destructive behavior at a steady pace. I hope that by living this way one day I will find something that fills emptiness and actually feel something real for once. I really hope that some of what said will help.

I've been wondering if I was a sociopath... reviewing everything I've done in my life... I've always been a smooth talker in real life, but due to my anxiety, it wasn't possible. I remember I posted a question to Yahoo Answers about 4 - 5 years ago... asking if it was common to view "friends" as just objects of amusement, just someone to talk to... I actually thought it was normal... of course the responses were negative and I thought something was wrong with me... eventually I got over it. Online, where I can speak freely without my speech impediments... I've always, ALWAYS knew the right thing to say and I thought I was just... emotional, someone who could sympathize with someone... even if I never felt something personally, I acted like I did. I love to hear people's problems, and as you said, make a mental checklist.. but I never wanted to manipulate them for selfish intentions... I always tried to help them with their problems because it made me feel a lot better with myself... I never smiled in real life since I was an introvert, even if my facade at the moment was being happy... I always found people as... people to talk to... I help people with problems because it helps me pass the time... after I help them and their life is better off than before I met them, I leave because it gets boring... I always hated small-talk and every potentially interesting topic has been used up... I slowly leave from their lives and find the next 'victim' to help...

Due to me being an introvert, I've never been good at talking to people, so in real life I thought I was a normal no-life nerd who loved technology and remained to himself. I do hope I still am... but I'm not sure... I ******* LOVE my mother and grandparents... I would KILL for them, but I don't think I'd mourn their loss for long... much at all really... as much as I love them, it'd be a more... logical approach... the loss of a benefit... who's going to take care of me, I'd ask... not "Why did she have to die! Why not me?"

I really hate myself, and I hope I'm not a sociopath... I hope it's just depression... I hope it's just me being a little *****... to try to dispel the fact that I'm a sociopath... I... I hate harming others, but I wouldn't feel anything for killing someone, just about what may happen to me... the repercussions... what if the police come after me? What if his family comes to kill my family? I've always thought of it this way... if I killed someone and it looked like their family would want revenge, I'd have to kill the rest... but I don't want to kill someone... because I wouldn't want someone to kill me for some stupid reason... sometimes I feel things... I think... a fluttery feeling in my chest when I say "I love you" to my mother... but it's the same regardless of the emotion, I could be talking with someone and about to lie and I feel a feeling in my chest... having an understanding of what I am would help me mentally...


Also, no I've never harmed an animal... I love animals, more than humans in general... I'd save my cat over a stranger any day... and the only time I'd choose the stranger (if it's a child) would be if someone was there to judge me based on my actions...


Long message is long.. so a "LOL OP UR A FAGET" and some proof that I'm not a sociopath would be great... but then again, if I wasn't and you said I was, I'd suffer from it... and I do suffer from even believing that I'm a sociopath...

I'm not a psychiatrist, but you don't come across to me as a sociopath. I think your disassociation has become a defense mechanism. I'm sure somewhere buried in the DSM book or at the desk of some wannabe psych doctor there is a name for what you have going on but it sounds to me like you feel TOO much versus not at all. Don't sweat it. You don't owe anybody anything.

Please tell me you at least know the letter is starts with, or what some of the symptoms are... the symptoms I've seen for sociopathy never fit me... I mean, sure I lacked guilt/remorse for my actions, but I never did anything negative or bad from it. I'm an introvert, but predicting what others say came rather easily when I was around 12... but once again, I never did anything bad. I know that if I wanted to, I could easily manipulate someone I just met and make them trust me, but it I didn't like doing... I'm going to say it felt wrong deep inside that I did that... maybe you're right, perhaps I've overreacting and it's just disassociation from fear of being hurt and manipulated... but I'm still interested in knowing WHAT exactly I have.

Why? So if I tell you that you have Borderline Personality Disorder, then what? You gonna print a shirt with it on there? You have to get some type of therapy. Knowing the disease doesn't cure it.

I am very sorry about your inability to love and feel what most normal people feel, and just reading the first part of your forum makes me feel sad and disturbed. I know some people on this website make out like being what you are is awesome and empowering and maybe they feel that way because it is a defense mechanism against all the"I can feel this and be fulfilled and you can't" sort of thing and I'm sure people such as yourself feel very frustrated and angry at those who feel alive and not dead inside. I understand why socialpaths do what they do and it is very hurful and unimaginable to go through life not feeling what you should be feeling. Instead all you feel like doing is getting even or plotting someone's demise so you can feel fulfilled...and yet the feeling seldom comes and if it does it quickly vanishes so you take another shot, and another until you feel fulfilled. I every now and then wonder what it would be like just to not care about anyone but myself. I had a very tough life and was always picked on in school when I was young, even my friends were cruel, my parents were constantly fighting in front on me and dragged me into it and I have taken much mental and emotional abuse from that and from the kids throughout my school career. My boyfriend I broke up about four years ago who I admired more than anything because he hurt me and quickly moved on to someone else and now I feel so worn down by it all. I am now 22 years old and I have what it appears to be some mental issues where I can't handle being close to anyone or become attached, and I feel miserable when I do because I feel like I'm being trapped and held back. I don't trust anyone at all and I can easily see through people, I am most of the time antisocial however I can be very cheerful and talkative around people as if I wasn't. I guess I have alot of natural charm that I suppose is necessary in certain situations. I refuse to date or have any kind of intimacy with anyone and I'm always paranoid and get very easily upset if someone insults my intelligence. I am however highly empathetic and I love listening to people's problems...it can be an emotional burden sometimes because I have my own stuff to deal with. My story is much more complex but I just wanted to scratch the surface and give alittle info about myself. I guess due to the constant sadness and emptiness that I feel, I often wonder what it would be like to be like you and not worry about everything because all I do is worry and feel not only my pain but everyone elses and it really hurts me physically as well as emotionally and mentally. Sometimes I even fantasize about hurting usually "abusive men" to make myself feel better. No I have never been physically abused but I love someone very much who has and I hate those people more than anything and sometime wish to see them suffer despite their backgrounds. <br />
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But anyways, I hope all is well for you. I am very proud that you made amends for the problems you caused and that takes a big person to do so. I don't believe you are evil or inhuman. You just suffer from a psychological disorder and that is not your fault. I'm sure it was hard to listen to my story because of the connection issue but from what have gathered, you are seasoned in what you do so it must not be so hard now. I hope you can be there for your kids because I'm sure they need to you to be there and support them. Hopefull they don't have the same disorder that you do because that is even more devastating to see a child with that problem. If they do, then there still is time and hope for them. I am here for advice anytime you need it. That is if you want it. :)

I appreciate the feedback. You have a lot of life in front of you. I feel like Dear ****** Abby over here but don't take **** from dudes that don't make you feel good and are genuine about you.

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You know what's funny? Sociopaths and Psycopaths do not percieve that anything is wrong with them, a key symptom. <br />
<br />
The fact that the poster and many others here brag about being Sociopaths/Psychopaths clearly indicates that you sad little f------ are in desperate need of attention. If any inch of what the poster said is true, then he's just an a------. <br />
I have been diagnosed with many symptoms of a sociopath which I obviously deem to be inaccurate. After all, the pyschiatrist only knows what you say, not what you think. Although the fact I argue his finding is a symptom....I could go on forever about how confused I am, getting told there is something wrong with me when I don't believe it, the whole worlds probably crazy, or I'm just a child stuck in a mans body.

You have figured out the holy grail. I am doing backflips over here for you. I don't wanna be a douche. I'm sure you have issues like most of the world. When I wrote this I was in a weird intellectual place. I guess I was the square peg trying to fit myself into the round peg. I know what I am and perhaps you are right.. just another *******. I'm sure that tag holds true for you as well by many of the people in your life. It is what it is.

I think he's saying he doesn't want to be a sociopath. You read it incorrectly

It was just recently brought to my attention by one who loves me, i am a sociopath, I'm an18 year old girl, who has had nothing but behavioral issues from when i was about 7, and internal conflict just not knowing why i have these impulsive's, and why do I not think before act. I'm scared and freaked out. I mean I'm left questioning, will i ever love, ever feel the love of the people around me. Most of all I wander is all the smiling, laughing and what i thought or fooled myself into believing was happiness real? Everyone use to describe me as a happy, hyper, energetic person, always smiling laughing but I'm left wandering have I manipulated myself into thinking I'm happy?. I mean everything I've done wrong, impulsively and or manipulatively finally has some sort of a reason behind it instead of the answer "Idk" I've had to give so many times when questioned "why dis you do this". I need help, i don't feel these impulsive 's all the time I mean is it possible for us to live in society, with family, and try to control them. I've never hurt an animal, I don't have anger issues, never have, and i don't have an aggression problem. My sociopath y seems to be, lying, manipulating. No physical pain inflicted i actually hate pain, i cant watch others get hurt it makes me cringe, but do tend to inflict emotional pain, or conflict. I need serious help, yes i see a counselor, but i need to know is there someone out there who can give me hope at a semi normal life. <br />
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Sincerely<br />
18 and just fond out im a sociopath

You're just depressed. Not even in the same universe. Not downplaying your issues because I am sure they cause you problems. The person who gave you the wisdom about you being a sociopath is a moron.

DC,<br />
I am the mother of a 20 year old sociopath. I gave him my love, life and devotion. He has destroyed me. He has destroyed my life. He has broken my heart. This is a spiritual thing... this is evil, pure... vile... evil. He spent 3 years in institutions, from age 8. Now he is polishing his act, becoming more sophisticated in his cons, lies, manipulations, destructions. (Maybe you two can go into business together). I spent this morning padlocked in my room, for safety, as he raged outside of my door. I've tried to help. I cannot help him. I regret, as I am sure your mother regrets, bringing him into this poor unsuspecting world. I've lived in utter, endless despair over him. Maybe there is a God, that can save you both. You are not fit for human consumption. maybe there is a God in Emotions Anonymous that can give you your soul back. You both, I am sure are comforted (oh yeah! you cant FEEL that... not comforted, but satisfied , that you are in powerful company... George Bush, **** Cheney, Donald Rumsfeld, and all the perpetrators at Abu Graib, and Guantanemo! I pray you ******* back to Hell!

War is hell. Across the sea and on the homefront. Sounds like its time to cut the purse strings and let your 20 year old fend for himself.

To be honest; you don't sound like a very lovely and kind person yourself. So, there is that too.

How are you doing? It's been awhile since your last post. I love your confession, I recently found out I'm a socio, and I hate it, this is why my life is ******, cause of me, noone to blame, conned manipulated, indebted and a parasite, and all I am remorseful about is not having a retirement, I think some socios are wildly successful (in terms of money) but most of us, never even realize that we're missing something critical, and still all of out choices are ours, old friends would actually yell in my face that I was disrespecting, but they always left thinking they were the dumb ones, well they're all gone, living at my moms now, old as ****, I cry all day long, a grown manchild, cause I got nothing noone and will spend the last years of my life who knows, a ward of the state? What happens to geriatrics when they have nothing and still owe 100k in student debt for a job they could never hold down. I would say we should bind together, us sociopaths, but sad thing is that the rich ones couldn't give a **** and the poor ones would just be sloppy in our manipulations from desperation. I'm too much of a coward for suicide, as most sociopaths, but in all honesty a normal person would have offed themselves a long time ago and if our character was in a <br />
Ovie but lastly I want, I need to say this, I don't ******* care if your static personality dictates some packaged response,,, but I love you, random who ever the **** you are, i idealize love, I think the worst people deserve the most, and we by all I can tell are, so person on the web, someone out here identifies and would defend you no matter how aweful you are, I hope I can get that too someday without lying.

You are the dream victim of people like me.

There is a way out. be who you are andbe honest about who u are and you will find someone who loves you for just as dark and soiopathic as you may be. You are who you are for a reason. It takes all kinds to make the world work. But the lying and keeping up appearances is exhausting.. If u have a love u can be honest with its such a relie. Besides the world needs u that is why you stick around.. as with any sociopath u know u are the most interesting and fascinating person anyone will ever meet lol I feel the same. Just be who you re and dont think so much. There is a fine line between genius and insanty. Dont push yourself over the edge, You have a place in the world just like everyone else. Just like you said.. You didnt choose to be this way..you just are. So accept you are for a reason and find rest and refuge in that fact.

Good thing there are people like you to balance things out. Don't underestimate the next person you meet though.

As a young psychopath/sociopath I have to disagree with you. I will never feel bad about hurting people, be it by accident or on purpose. The only thing I don't like about being a sociopath is not knowing what emotions are like. I want to know what it would be like to care about other people. I want to know what I'm missing out on, to know if its better or worse that what I've got.

I was involved with a sociopath, he was in prison for armed robbery etc. Eventually took me for $8000 and promises to pay back. What is your advice in getting it back or conning the con artist at his own tricks? He lives under the radar, no taxes, few belongings, but now has someone pregnant and he has always wanted a child.<br />
Help me get my money back!

Here is my post.....I am still dealing with one of you. I am a normal. In fact, ever since I've been little, I feel like I feel too much sometimes, but at the same time I feel like I don't fit in, like I am off from the rest of the world. This is probably why I related to him.....we both feel off, but I feel too much, and he feels too little. They say opposites attract, well there it is, we relate on one level, and on another we repel. The only way I am relating to him now is mentally. I know he is keeping tabs on me, no one will believe me, they do not understand. I write poetry, feel too much. He thinks of how and when he will get what he wants from me, while also plotting and controlling his new prey. He does not pray, I am sure of it. I am so grateful and thankful of so many things in my life. He cannot feel grateful, or the immense amount of love I feel for so many things.<br />
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He will never get what he wants from me. Yes, on some level I love him. I do truly feel sorry for him, and for all of you too. It is not your fault that you do not have a conscience. Your brain did not develop normally. Mine did, that's why you call us normals. You"re just like an autistic child who didn't ask for this. What a sentence! We all have our cross to bear, I have mine too, but nothing like yours. We all become famliar with our own pain, maybe it is no better or worse than the next human.<br />
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He can't stand the fact that he can't have me. He acts like it doesn't matter, but I am beating him at the one game he considers himself excelling in. I walked away. He can't touch me physically. And the more I remove myself from him, the more I know it was the right thing. I once heard the only way to deal with a manipulator, is to manipulate.<br />
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I am truly in awe of you all. I don't know how you survive day after day, and I applaud you for keeping up the good fight. I know a schizopphenic, he hears voices constantly. When he is on his meds, and most of the time he is, the voices are quieter, but they never go away. I too admire him. He has not comitted suicide yet. <br />
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I predict in the future....the socio will be like the mentally ill, like the truly ADD/ADHD, like the autistic, like the depressed....research says you cannot be cured, but is it possible that you can live a longer, less painful life on medication? It is all brain wiring...yours was wired differently...individual therapy is no good for you, just more ammunition, but meds, chemicals interacting with the chemicals that control our nervous system and our thoughts...if a sociopath was to try some medication consistently, who knows what the results might be? And like these other brain altered people, it might be trial and error. But let's face it, you all grow weary as you get older... I am tired just thinking of it. Good luck with the con, more people are seeing you coming. And that is a good thing...we are talking about you more. 30 years ago you never heard mentally ill, or ADD, all you heard was he is retarted or that's my wierd Uncle Tom. It is all genetic, it ain't your fault. And brain research is so cool.<br />
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I will pray for you everyday. Your pain is not like cancer, that may go into remission. I think it is time to come out of the dark . I envision a support group, not unlike AA, where you can all share your cons, and be youself with one another and your own self, if only for a little while everyday. That and meds, who knows? Maybe a little less torture inside. God bless you all, and God bless research!!

Its Ms ***** to you....Cant be a hustler if you dont have ****, the bad thing about it is if i was a sociopath i would be very proficent in what i did, and not be exposed

You say sociopath, I say hustler. Quit being a little *****.

lol, what pathetic burnouts!!!! are you serious!!!! so when is the count down for your self destruction you need a push, no one has taken your civil liberties and ******** you of all your shameless actions lets see how you will react when it does happen lets see how you will use your charm then...lmao ... and you brag about it like its cool, that is the most hilarious **** Ive ever seen in my life!!!! weak and feeble, tisk tisk what a shame, and you belive your own hype about yourselves that is the best...and then your rationalization of you dont rape and stick guns to your victims you may as well...classic...wheew what to do next? so you think you know it all dont you having all the high intelligence and all...well, what are you waiting for you got more victims to assault...you better hurry up time is a tickin....and the way I see it its not very much time you have <br />
lol!!!!

there is the sociopath and then there is the antisocial personality disorder.<br />
One animal completely different from the other even though they appear to have the same fur so to speak.<br />
looking at it all, it seems more like learned behavior as somewhere inside you can intellectualize that it's wrong to be that way.<br />
the sociopath would not spend anytime evaluating that unless the goal was to rope another victim.<br />
Pray and pray hard. <br />
Oh, and when you are flat out tired of praying, pray more.<br />
Miracles can happen.

somebody like you who has remorse, and doesnt truly enjoy who they are, will have a nice break in the end. i mean look at what you have, a girlfriend and her family who stick with you even with your condition. theres always reason to stick with it man, dont ever commit suicide.

clearly no one can understand a sociopath unless you are one...i am one and its hard for me to understand my friends and family when sometihing goes bad.. like an example the toher day my friends bf cheated on her and i was there when it all happenned.. what am i supposed to do in that situation?? i dont feel bad for her i pretty much dont care.. i want to.. but i dont and that is the thing not all sociopath go around ravaging thousands of dollars.. some want ot be normal but there is no one who wants to understand us.. its not that we dont care its taht we cant care..

yes their is missy, but if we did that then who is going to bark....nobody so where is the fun.<br />
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howz you anyway missy?

Oh sure, sure. Whatever keeps you entertained while I'm out. Want a whack or bang at my partner? Go for it. I'd like her back in one piece though.

not windex, it smudges. and it is terrible at cleaning blood up. can I reserve as executioner and torturer please, I think I might shine at that.

You're not like a janitor! More of a house keeper. Though, if you still want a broom, mop, bucket, windex, and cloth, I can get it for you, I'm sure. :D

oh wow a janitor, do i get my own broom and everything

It was bound to happen! Now, go forth and fetch me a body! XP Just messing, you can stay and watch over the palace and what not, while I go hunting. :D

you become empress

Woah! And you're living in the future! What happens to me, oh wise one? XP

lol, I would love that, ha your living in the past, its still 2009 that could be realy spooky.

wow... it's only 10pm here. :D hey, that means it's new years there. oh, that makes sense that you're drunk. if i had friends i cared to hang out with, i would be too. too bad you guys can't just teleport here and then we could be idiots together! Yayyy!!!!

lol just read it again oh well...hey eating own arm off remember--------->

Well that is a relief to hear! I'm glad you weren't being closed-minded or anything of that sort!<br />
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Erm... Charming was refering to his spelling not yours. He wanted to make sure that you knew it wasn't a mistake that he wrote it "prey" and not "pray." <br />
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Ha, you never know! You could have a gun to your face and someone might ask you a spelling question and if you don't know it he may kill you! :P Hey now... there's an idea... hmm

what opinion XCREV... I was just venting, something wierd, I did feel better though. I aint bothered what you do or don't believe I aint here for that i'm here to vent, and not vent. I didnt want to take in his story I just wanted to vent and irritate, I was bored. :))))<br />
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charming, you amuse me, I see everybody coming, It's what I'm good at. I wouldn't trust you if you were the queen and give me a 100k in a bag.<br />
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but hey I don't actualy care, I may not be good at spelling but that realy aint going to save my life is it now?

As usual I have no real opinion here, but I know when I'll lose an argument and when I won't and this is not one that I can win because I don't have the first idea of sociopathic behavior vs false pretense. ...opinion is the wrong word. I have an opinion, I always have an opinion. I'm just... indifferent (for lack of a better word). PA and Durden, as much as you amuse me and as much as I enjoy arguing on your side, I don't think you guys took the time to take into consideration of each paragraph and comment made. He already explained that he didn't feel guilty. There's a difference between guilt and remorse. Guilt is for others, remorse is for yourself. PA you sound much too much like you're trying to be more than you are. It makes it hard to regard your opinion of this subject. I'm not saying that none of that happened because how the hell would I know? I'm just saying that you're trying too hard.<br />
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As for Charming, I thoroughly enjoyed this post. You can't blame them though. Those people claiming to be sociopaths. I mean, you Can, but it's not with an understanding. They want to fit in somewhere. For the life of me, I couldn't tell you why, but they do. And what better place to do that then in a world where they can dream of escaping their emotions? They may feel, but they probably don't want to and that's probably why they wish they were sociopaths. They probably don't understand just how awful it may be. Or maybe I'm completely wrong and making an idiot of myself. It doesn't really matter though. I've wasted a few minutes of my time, so it works for me.

LOL. Priest. You sound like a back woods thug. ie, the easiest manipulation.. the kind of person that thinks the world of himself without the intellect to back it. One word comes to mind.. prey. And look at the spelling, I don't mean looking to the heavens for advice. I may be your sister's next boyfriend. And if getting in your graces means I will get something I want from you, then I will be the tobacco spittin hick or Camaro driving Guido you would need me to be. You have something to learn about the world. It isn't the one's you see coming that can hurt you, you can probably handle them. <br />
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Patrick, remorse comes in many colors. I have shallow regret every day. Mental statements such as "damn I should not have done that, its gonna **** me up long term" are what you are constituting as feeling bad. You are inserting a context into this that was not intended to be there. Call it a communication error on my part. The game always needs to be refined.

No it isn't sociopathic. Real sociopaths are incapable of feeling bad about their actions. If you were a real sociopath you wouldn't be on here talking about how remorseful about your actions.

"when you go up the ladder, make sure you shake every bodies hand on the way up, that way the fall is less painful"<br />
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you are an idiot and a fool, I don't like you much. why? because, you screwed everybody over, and fooked yourself over in the process.<br />
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their is nothing special abot you nothing scarry your weak, you know how to con your family woop-a-dee-doo.<br />
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so why you here? to gloat? attention? sympathy? show your superiority(weakness)? or just to comment?<br />
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I am younger than most on here, but my life ha made me teach me alot about life, or should I say my father has, a con man, ex-military (para's) a fighter(bare-knuckle) a tax-man (drugs and money) a drugdealer, I followed him and learned every thing I needed to know.<br />
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the 2 keys of survival in my world is your fittness and your paranoia, because every body is out to screw you and nobody does or gives you any thing for free. I was brought up around a fighting family, all drug runners, drug taxers, soldiers, and street fighters, we go back to the original I.R.A.<br />
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I have no reason to lie you don't know who I am what I am capable of, it's just words, I am hidden behind a computer like the rest of you so why would I lie it would be pointless.<br />
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"Do I need to go on? This is a fuggin sociopath. This is what I am. I'm a scumbag you better pray never comes into your life."<br />
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try it I will eat you alive :)))

Decievinglycharming, I fully expect to have your perspective in a decade or two, and that forecast is mortifying to my present mentality. I don't know what else to type to praise your posts, but reading this tread was thoroughly educational - albeit haunting.

Awwww a sociopath with a "soul". Seems like things have been working for you, why regret it or care about the aftermath that others experience. Its not your problem. And by the way not wanting to be what you are is only going to bring you misery, embrace what you are and love it/revel in it.

You don't have a purpose, unless you choose one for yourself.

Sometimes i sit down and think about what my life will be like when i am in my 40's and 50s, see i won'tkill myself cause i think thats the easyway out, what is the purpose of life if we don't see it to the end, i don't think its cool to be like this, but neither am i pissed off about it, cuase i didn't do it to myself, this higher power must have made me like this for a purpose and i don't know about you, but i'm seeking my purpose

A part of getting older is knowing when to charge in and when to lay back and wait things out a bit. Tame? I don't know that I was ever wild to begin with?<br />
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Versp, you come across as a pseudo intellectual idiot. Unfortunate for you that you see things in such black and white terms.

Tame no, experienced yes

So, am I correct on assuming that the older sociopaths here have recieved a sort of 'Revelation' and have become 'tame'?

Deceiving, I would just look on the internet at the IRS page or google IRS amnisty and see what comes back.<br />
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But you probably could deal directly with them and save the cost of a lawyer.<br />
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You know your position better than anyone.

I am 44 Phage and I am no burn out. <br />
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My futures so bright I have to wear shades.<br />
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We are living in amazing times for psychopaths and sociopaths. Many vulnerable people out there, just ripe for the plucking as Phage would spell (hehe)

Quest, thanks for the candor. I think I'm in a similar place (mentally) as you. A reformulation of ideas to live out the second half of my life with a bit less chaos. I've been sober for 7 years, I am caught up on current child support, I have no warrants, and I really do like my GF's family (which for me means they are tolerable people that don't ask for much). The IRS advice is sound and is the path for survival. I'm sitting on about $20K. I'll contact a tax attorney to start some negotiations.<br />
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I doubt I could ever commit suicide. I don't feel that level of bleak emptiness. I believe there is always a way out.<br />
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Verspillem, I think you are spliting hairs with semantics. A sociopath is capable of remorse if you think of it in our terms.. regret for a loss to our own benefit or welfare. That's how I took Quest's comment.

For me, I am at a rebirthing stage in my life, my kids are grown, my family died while I was in prison. <br />
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Soon it will be time to be on the move, no home, no stagnation. <br />
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These gifts do not have to end in suicide, none of the extreme versions (Bundy, Manson, Son of Sam to name a few) commited suicide.<br />
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I agree that you have probably played this chapter out in your life and are remorsing about leaving the comforts behind that the normals in your life have provided.<br />
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Now it is time to move on, as far as the taxes go, owing taxes is not illegal, evading them is. If I were you I would call the IRS and make arrangements to make a payment schedule. Keeping the payments are another thing. The IRS does not get on you until about seven years normally.<br />
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Or you could sit back and wait for your world to come crashing down around you.<br />
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Personally I would plan my escape.

Some people can play content all they want. Within the core of this affliction lies pain, anger and low self esteem. <br />
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The grandiosity comes with the package I suppose. Some of the commentors are rookies.. babies with wet stuff still behind their ears. You probably won't get a real clue as to who you are until you are well into your thirties. <br />
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That's just life. Phage can you tell me that you don't already carry a cynicism and distaste for "normal" people. Are they not beneath you? Well, I think you do have an idea as to what happens to those cancerous negative feelings over time. <br />
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To the person above that asked if these emotions were new developments. Its hard to say. Like I said, I am not in the realm of a serial killer. I occasionally get emotionally moved by a movie and I believe in a higher power. Perhaps the emotions are more learned behavior than anything. I don't know.

Oh god I hope I never get 'cured' O_o

What a downer. It's true, I guess. Sociopaths burn out in their 40s and become miserable and gloomy.<br />
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I get why the lifestyle could get old after a while, I'm really good at getting bored with things, but half of what you said makes no sense.<br />
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Why should you even care about the devastation you cause in people's lives? Why does it matter if they're "good" people or not? Did you always feel that kind of thing, or is it a new development?

This is quite true. I have found myself looking for the same empty gratifications, and feeling the absolute void. Truly, we suffer the same if not more than those not afflicted, and we never get to know the true happiness they do. But we have something else, that thing that classifies us as sociopaths, and thats our advantage.<br />
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If you ignore your emotions, and get past the fact you hurt people, its just boring rather than devastating.

Cover must have a hard time looking past his/her own nose. Not bragging.. I don't think you get it. The end of the line for me is suicide. What other end is there? I didn't even give half the story. I haven't paid taxes in four years. I know what awaits.. karma or otherwise the price for being like this is beyond high.. its ultimately devastating. <br />
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Guess what? I AM 41 and angry.. angry that I have had to live a life devoid of true happiness. Immortal? Huh? You have problems interpreting the English language? The point of my post is that some 20 something kids on here are sharing ideas on how to be cooler sociopaths. I gave a does of reality of what it really is and where it takes you. I am not looking for praise, infamy or to become immortalized. I want it to end.

I am like you. I need help

In case you didn't notice, DC has said they don't like being a sociopath. It's not like sociopathy is something you can easily 'cure' or anything.<br />
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Sociopathy scares me because I can't understand the people themselves, even though I've read a lot about it. But what you posted was rather rude. DC knows what they do, okay? So don't be a ***** about it.

Usually, karma is a b!tch...not to sound trite. <br />
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You may not have to pay for this behavior now, but spend your last years dealing with the results of this. Look at Madoff. I've seen the work bullies get the boot from a job, just when they're think it's getting comfortable and they can get away with what they're doing. <br />
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I guess you must be a sweet talker if you can get someone to give you all of her money. Maybe my experiences don't allow me to trust men and be cheap at the same time. After a brief stint with someone like you, I've stayed away, far away.