Solitary Man

We moved around a lot because my Father was in the military, I kept making friends and then losing them, The feeling was unbearable, finding someone who you could tell every secret to and who accept you in all your oddities. I remember one special friend I met in England we were the best of friends, we promised to stay in touch but his address and information was destroyed while in transit to States, I was always kind of shy always in my own world. I was not interested in sports at all, Still I don't watch sports. I remember writing a lot when I was young , short stories etc. I remember when I was 13 I had a relationship with a girl while in England, we hardly ever spoke, She would follow me around every where I went , we would just sit together for hours without words enjoying nature , The only time I ever remember talking to her was when I had a allergic reaction to a plant we came across in a field. The relationship was different to me because I felt we were starting to communicate without words, picking up on every small detail. I've made a couple friends since then but I think my idea of a friend does not exist anymore, I am loyal to a friend so it was weird to see friends not being loyal and tell my secrets, secrets were kind of valuable to me especially when a friend kept mine maybe it's because trust was made strong through it. Being shy I think being publicly embarrassed had a bigger effect on me, One of my friends enjoyed embarrassing me in public, I did not understand it all, maybe it's the culture. I spend more time alone than with someone and I love it. It's maybe a sheltered lifestyle , people ask me questions about things and they are shocked I don't know what they are talking about sometimes. I almost feel like I'm like one of those children locked away in their room, in their own World and loving the privacy. I'm loving it.