Am I Really A Stalker?

after some contemplation i have to wonder if i even qualify under the term stalker. i have posted my story before,  i met a girl in grade 11, call her tara, we briefly dated, he had a casual sexual relationship over a few months in grade 12. during which she and i practised bondage. i broke it off and ended up dating a mutual friend. after we broke up, i tried to reengage tara and she cut off contact with me. after about a year and a half, i sent her a message appologizing for the way i treated her, we were friends for 24 hours before i told her i was intoxicated and she cutt off contact again. so for the last year i've been quietly accessing her friends facebook profiles and looking at their pictures of her, i was able to find her pages on several networking sites, i've read most of her blogs including poems about how bad i made her feel when i tied her down. 

i've done some research and the classification i (apparently) fall into is "former intimate stalker" that is that we previously had a relation ship which, when ended, severed an emotional connection i deemed necessary. that is, i think, when we practised bondage, i had all the power, i posessed someone else. then i ended it because i thought i had enough power. the same way a schizophrenic stops taking their medication because they think they are cured. she didnt enter my mind much for a while. then it came roaring back. but if the definition of stalking is to make unwanted contact, i havent done that. after she cut contact the last time, i havent even breathed in her direction. infact, she came to my work with her boyfriend to try and make me jealous. but, i have a PDF i think some of you may want to read, which classifies the different kinds of stalkers and may help you get to the root of your own problem.

http://www.canadiancriminallaw.com/articles/abstracts/stalk_abst.htm
 
 

and heres my origional post, a more in depth look at my story.

EP Link

 
braindamage99 braindamage99
18-21
3 Responses Aug 1, 2010

Stalking may not be the big picture here but a little picture that your seeing. If you feel you need to have power over someone its generally a sign that your feel weak about yourself. The sentence "infact, she came to my work with her boyfriend to try and make me jealous" is you saying that she is trying to do something to you to make her a part of your world so in a way she is still yours. Your feeling of jealous would express you haven't let go of her and that you still have a connection or you still long for that connection.. Now from my experience it is ok to go dig up old relationships, some people can coexist as friends but that only people that can handle just being friends. Some people just want that door open to scheme their way back in to assert their power..

If your actions are causing her to fear for her safety or causing her psychological harm in ANY way, then it IS stalking.<br />
She is obviously not interested and being that you guys were in high school, you really need to realize you have a LIFETIME of exploring new relationships with wonderful people. <br />
It is sooo not worth it to stalk someone who doesn't want you in their life. You could end up with a criminal record which will make it hard for you to get the job you want, cross borders into countries you are traveling to and what future girl will want to date someone with a conviction of criminal harassment / stalking?<br />
<br />
It's not worth it. Move on.

If your actions are causing her to fear for her safety or causing her psychological harm in ANY way, then it IS stalking.<br />
She is obviously not interested and being that you guys were in high school, you really need to realize you have a LIFETIME of exploring new relationships with wonderful people. <br />
It is sooo not worth it to stalk someone who doesn't want you in their life. You could end up with a criminal record which will make it hard for you to get the job you want, cross borders into countries you are traveling to and what future girl will want to date someone with a conviction of criminal harassment / stalking?<br />
<br />
It's not worth it. Move on.