In Trouble For Stalking

It started with a Valentines card. It is a library worker. I recovered from heart surgury and maybe a second chance at life
made me go through a new realization. I have not been in love for years, but suddenly I fell in love with this librarian
who I had not really fallen for in the many years I went to the library. I can never remember her face, so I always end
up looking at her. She told me I she was not interested and I asked her to explain why so that I could move on. She said
she was seeing someone. I ended up going to the library routinely because I lost my job after Valentines Day and the day
before Ash Wednesday, when I went to the library with ashes on my forehead for her to see--that I am a a good guy. She sort
of had goth makeup on that day. We both by chance had new haircuts too.
This has all been entering into  the Twilight Zone. Her male co worker confronted me in the library a few days ago..over two months after
all this started, and I should have said
I know what this is really about. I can't remember what she looks like! But I didn't instead I became defensive, and that cost me. The library director
had a warning letter written and sent it the next day. The library director had started calling me by my first name three weeks earlier.
The warning is notification of stalking required under state law. So I don't consider what I did as stalking but that I've been warned.
It is really difficult knowing I cannot go to the library because if I even look at her...remind you of some racist laws under slavery? Don't
even look at that woman! She has or the library director could say I am stalking again. The trouble in Wisconsin is if that goes on
your record anyone can see it online. I figure I have to lay low and go to another library for a long time so that a pattern of behavior is not
evident. The certified mail the warning letter came in I could not open right away. I did it at the doctor's office while setting up an
appointment. The doctor had been wanting to see me. It is weird because it is like everyone knew I was on a dangerous course.
Someone at the library two weeks into this episode that I was stalking, and she did not even know me. I replied its Valentines Day.
I could not stop going to the library. I am not sure what I really did is stalking. I got caught in the stacks looking at her and could not get out.
I had meant to just take a glance. I have to get through this because I have felt like I cannot go on. Explaining this helps. I have listened to
love songs instead of talk radio for the first time in years. It was really fun being in love with her. I have the greatest admiration for people
who have found love. What I loved about her is she is so obedient to society, and I would have to be on my knees to be worthy. I need to move
on and find a job. I am thinking the doctor is going to suggest the therapy that is so expensive. I need to get my brain fixed to memorize all the medical
terminology to go into a health career. I am not sure that is going to work, but I will need to pay for all these medical premiums. While she is so stable
I struggle on. This is a really hard reality to accept. It is like those who I really like are never interested in me. Some karma, huh?
spfhr spfhr
41-45
1 Response May 4, 2012

that was very rude of her i think. u liked her that isnt a crime!!!! she shud b flattered! not mad jeez she is really not worth it if she is being like that there r other women out there. yes like the other comment stay clear of her ...