My Ex Gave Me Std...and I Still Love Him

I recently had myself checked and found out that i had a minor STD. I believe I had gotten it from my ex boyfriend from two years ago. While I had been intimate with another man, I am certain I had never slept with anyone after my ex.

This ex of mine is still present in my life. We see each other sometimes: either he asks me out or i ask him out. I don't think he is returning for good and sometimes I feel he is just stringing me along. When we're together, he makes me feel like I am his world. But when we're apart (which is 90% of the time), I am certain I don't even enter his mind.

My dilemma with regard to this STD is three-fold:
1. I do not feel any anger towards him for this. Should i? It is equally my risk that I agreed to make love with him without protection. I somehow feel that, it serves me right and i should bear the responsibility. Is this right to feel this way??
2. Should i tell him about it?
3. How should i tell him about it?

Any thoughts would be appreciated...
isabellabiatta isabellabiatta
26-30, F
2 Responses May 12, 2012

I also have a minor std. You shouldn't be angry with him for it. The two of you agreed together to have sex. Unless he already knew he had it and didn't tell you, there is nothing to be angry about. You can feel however you want about it. I wouldn't recommend feeling ashamed, impure, or regretful about it though. You should see this as a wake up call to be safer. The best thing you can do is ask your partner to get checked out first. When I got mine I spent a lot of time feeling bad about it. After awhile though, I realized that I am going to be living with this thing for the rest of my life and that I need to accept it. It wasn't easy but I am completely content with having it now. You should definitely tell him about it. If he is the last person you had sexual contact with, let him know that you tested positive for it and that you would like him to get checked out to because you haven't slept with anyone since him. He might get angry if he thinks he got it from you, but he needs to know. If he is the only person you have had sexual contact with, then you got it from him and can mention that if he starts to get upset about it.

Just read this now. Thanks for your view.

ok well first does he know he has it? If he didnt know and u were intimate then it is on both of ur shoulders for responsibility. if he lied and said he wasnt intimate with someone else before or something and then u two were intimate then it is his fault. I think u shud tell him about it. for one he probably has it too and it cud effect his health and two if he ever cheats or has cheated (not saying he has) he could have given it to another girl. i heard a story once of this guy being intimate getting std and having to call like 20 girls because he ended up having it and warning them about it. for how u shud tell him i think u shud b gentle about it. if none of these options i have given u r the case then b easy going about it. if he truly didnt know then i mean u cant do anything about it, but then again he cuda been safe and checked with a doctor before he was like intimate again. it goes both ways honestly....