Staying Home Can Be a Tough Job

When I was younger, I never dreamed I would be a stay at home mommy. I thought that was one step above being a housewife. I had been raised by a grandmother who worked the opposite shift from her husband for years in order to provide care for her three kids while making money. I grew up with that sense of working is a must. However, since I did not have a good mother myself (or a very nice experience with my grandmother, as well), I was determined to be the best mother possible. And once I was pregnant and got more and more attached to the baby I was about to meet I couldn't imagine being away from her. So 15 months later, I have to say this is the best job I've ever had. I get kisses, snuggles, and lots of smiles. Plus, I really do bust my hump staying on top of taking care of my husband, two step kids, 15 month old baby and myself, soon to have another little one.

The only real complaint is that we live so far from my husband's family and my family, so there is no support there, and my friends live at least 2 hours away. It gets a little lonely at times, but in the end, I wouldn't really change a thing. I know all my kids are getting good care when they are with me.

momandahalf momandahalf
22-25, F
2 Responses Oct 23, 2008

Cindywhateverz,<br />
I know how you feel. I had two jobs lasting less than a year before I became a stay at home mommy. It does affect my self esteem at times. Sometimes I feel like I'm not doing so well as a mommy, because my 16 month old throws fits or my two stepkids don't listen to me, or the worst is when I lose my patience. When I worked I accomplished projects and felt satisfaction. I feel great satisfaction taking care of my kids, but at times I feel like I'm getting nowhere. For awhile until my husband got a better paying job we were behind on some bills and were forgetting or putting off paying stuff. It took several months finally getting down to business and making budgets when I took over the finances and made it work. We're finally caught up, but it is still a struggle at times to make the budget work, especially with five people to feed, diapers to buy, and one on the way. During times when the finances are especially tight I feel the worst, because my husband has all the burden of bringing home the money. However, I can't bear to think of leaving my babies with someone I don't know. It's hard.

I am a stay at home mom too. My husband and I both enjoy knowing that our kids are being well taken care of, by one of us or grandma, who we without a doubt know would have our kids best interests truly at heart. Lately, though, even though I don't have intentions of leaving my kids to go to work during the day, I do have thoughts of having a weekend job when my husband is home with the kids. Only because at times, I don't know about you ladies, but my self esteem sometimes dwindles when I have to tell people that I've only had 1 job my whole life when I was 18 where I only worked for about 3 months. I feel as if I need to explain myself and tell them I decided to stay home with my 6 year old and 1 year old from the time my oldest was born. Even though I can put on a strong face and be proud for all stay at home moms everywhere, its hard when I was single had a young child and had to deal with what most people refer to as welfare. Now I am remarried and have 2 children, one who is almost 7, and one who just turned 1. Just this past month, my husband is transitioning from unemployment and training to needing to look for work so we've had the lovely experience of needing assistance from social services, and they believe all parents should work because it promotes financial stabiillity in the household. However, our family's plan is one of us works and one of us watches the children. And that's what our choice is, but sometimes my self esteem suffers? I know our situations may be different, but do any of you sometimes feel like I do?