Help Please. New To This Site. Desperate And Need Support, Losing EverythingHello everyone!
I am a Stepmomma to a darling 4 year old boy. My husband and I got married when he was only 2 months old. I know what you may be thinking...boyfriend stealer? Well, no. My husband is in the Navy. He had a very short relationship with a girl. They broke up due to her cheating within the first month of them dating. He left on deployment, and that was the end of them (so he thought). 6 months into deployment he was told that this girl he was dating was pregnant. He got off the ship. The night my stepson was born, I met my husband. He was a fellow sailor to my roommate and needed a place to stay while he was going in for paternity blood tests. Well, obviously the child was his. Right off the bat this girl did not let him have anything to do with the baby. Through this short period (2 months) we fell in love. We were married within the next month. I am a teacher and have nothing but compassion and understanding towards other people. I did not get married to "take" a man away, I wouldn't even do that because his old relationships had no affect on me as a person. Welp, you can imagine that now it definitely does. Fast forward 4 years... We had a beautiful baby. The light of my life, the beauty in every day. But, the time back and forth to court just to have my husband see his son has taken a toll. A big one. She knew what she was doing when she got pregnant by a military man. She gets everything and can claim anything. We are finally getting close to having 50% custody. In the meantime I have filed for bankruptcy, had my car repossessed, $0 in the bank and now go to the park for free lunches for my 2 year old. Since my husband has to frequently move out of state for the Navy, we continually have to pay HIGH transportation costs, more child support, flight fees for hearings etc. She has also been able to claim back child support for the time that my husband and her were fighting in court in the very beginning. I need to know if there are any free lagal advisors or support groups to go to? I need to be able to feed my own child. Can she seriously get away with taking almost every dime from my family? Geez, I wish I could write you an entire book of what we have been through. The courts don't help us, unless we get an attorney. We did, now we are again in debt with them. I feel like this will never end, that we will forever be in poverty just because he got a girl pregnant. I am scared. I am scared for my baby and scared for my marriage. What are some key steps you have taken to ease the problems that arise? How can I protect my future? <---- This is a big question here. I need to protect myself and my baby. How will I know that this girl wont ever take everything? What can I do to move forward in this custody battle to make it end? We need to have this fair. We believe in supporting a child, but we need to live too. $1,000+ a month is not cutting it for us. Help! Please! I want to know, should I just get a divorce? Will this help my future? Thank you so much in advance.