Healing Tears...

I cry for the denial that’s still present, my strength
...or weakness that allows me to convince myself
That it wasn’t real, that it can’t be real, there’s no evidence.
I cry for my forever distortion of reality.

I cry for what was taken, for every happiness
stolen, every memory charred and damaged-
memories that can’t be replaced or fixed.
I cry for a broken childhood

I cry for a child within me who appears to
Have always been an object, a means to
An end, a goal, a wager or a challenge
I cry for an innocence that was never recognized.

I cry for the guilt I carry for everyone who
Witnessed and never spoke up, heard but never acted;
A heavy weight upon me that I carry because they can’t
I cry for repentance that has never been asked for and never will

I cry for lost faith, lost hope, lost trust, lost security,
Lost justice, lost identity, lost innocence, lost dreams
Lost childhood, lost intimacy, lost stability.
I cry for what I’ve lost due to the mistakes of others.

I cry for an already damaged path laid out ahead of me
Pre-cracked, pre-worn and unsteady from being walked on
In need of repairs with each new step-nothing to come easy
I cry for the burden that my life causes the man who truly loves me  
firefly21 firefly21
22-25, F
2 Responses Jul 24, 2010

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This is beautiful.... thanks for sharing. It speaks so loudly just what I feel inside as well.