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Roll With The Punches

I was knocked for a loop when I tore up my knee playing basketball. I was playing professionally in Europe when it happened and I was going to the NBA the next season but somehow I knew that wasn't going to happen when I felt my knee give way. Change of plans. I started my own successful business, sold it and started another.

After I torn up my knee I met the love of my life. She helped me start my business, shared in my pains, help celebrate our successes, and stuck with me during a 4 year stint in the military. One spring we were busy planning our wedding when a police officer appeared at my door and somehow I knew I wasn't going to get married that next summer. There was an accident and my future wife had been killed by a drunk driver.

I met another women a year after I sold my first business. After a short romance we got married. For years I thought we were in love and were happy. We took vacations all over the world. We enjoyed so much together or so i thought. THen i came home early from a business trip. Instead of staying another night i decided to surprises my wife. I took the red eye and was looking forward to surprising her. I got home and found a strange car in the driveway.... at 5 in the morning?. Somehow I knew my marriage was over.

Life goes on
mark247 mark247 41-45, M 45 Responses Apr 19, 2011

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You inspire me.

Anything that ignores the spiritual dimension can be nothing more than part of the truth.

I am sorry but it sounds like you are a very strong person.

It is true that life should go on. Be strong always. There are also people who are faithful no matter what.

Move on with your life and ask Jesus Christ to help you.

Of course there are positives in my life artemesia4u. Just as there is in all our lives. We just have to stop and concentrate on the positives. There is always something good. Im just looking forward to this next phase in my life. Its all any of us can do, Thanks so much for your comment artemesia4u.

atltattoo - Yes perseverance always wins in the end. Thanks for your comments. It means a lot to me that others gather strength from my story.

Yes it does get better Charmfer. Sorry to hear you too faced betrayal. I for one am not waiting for "eventually" to happen. Life is short so we have to get on with life.

It looks like you've gotten some really terrible as opposed to merely disappointing experiences in your life. I hope there are some positive happenings there too. At least you did enjoy what seems to me in your writing a happy mariage, at least for some time. Of course this certainly in no way negates how horribly unfairly she treated you. I'm hoping you don't judge every woman by her. Not that I'm a fan of Nietsche sp? but I do like how he said "That does not kill you makes you stronger" or whats to that effect.

mark, the one word i need to carry home from all this is perseverance. the reason i strarted reading all this was the title. one of my mantras is 'roll with it.' thanks for sharing your strength. i am stronger from your success story. j in atlanta

I can totally relate to the betrayal part... I was robbed for everything I had by my brother and his wife. All my money and whatever inheritance was left for me by my mother and grandparents. My father is too old to do anything about it so he just stood by my brother and shunned me. So basically I was left in the cold with absolutely nothing to go by and I've had to rebuild my life and that too out of no fault of mine. There is NEVER an easy way to deal with betrayal. It's just brutal! <br />
Dealing with a death of a close one is never easy either. Sometimes life can be so cruel but you just gotta pick yourself off the ground, dust yourself and keep rolling with the punches. :D It all does get better EVENTUALLY!!!

thanks Hannah777. Its not the making up the money that is important at all. I don't even keep much track of money. I just want to get on with life and find another partner to share with. When that happens i will be in a "better place" Ill just have to keep looking!

You're a very resilient person Mark. I am sorry for your loss as well as the betrayal you've suffered. You certainly deserved better than what you got in your previous marriage. You will make back the money financially, I have the feeling that you'll also come to a much better place soon. You have been through enough to floor most people, but I know you'll keep moving forward and pushing ahead. In the end, you will have what you are willing to fight for. Your story was very honest and moving.

Very well put iamprincess. You ahve the right idea!

This is how life unfolds before us. I am 21 but I have gone through a lot as well. I lost both my parents when I was 13 and my relatives ruin my life. Yet I managed to stand up and fight the odds. Because life goes on. In my life..my greatest lesson learned is that "Things come and go, and so does everybody."<br />
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We can do this. There is still much love in the world as long as we keep loving ourselves even when no one else does.

Daisy007 - Its so easy to give up when the going gets tough. Obstacles and problems in life give us excuses to give up. It is not that I don't get hurt and don't carry pain. We all do. The only difference is that I don't let it turn into an excuse to give up. Good things just don't happen to me, I work for them. Any good thing in my life happens because I work hard for it and never give up. Was i born this way or was it because my parents always telling me that if I wanted something i should just never give up? I don't know, but to this day I know it is the reason for all the good things that I get. Good things are worth fighting for..... always.

I certainly do not feel like a star Ogiboy but I thank you for your thoughts. I just do what I feel we all have to do to deal with what life gives us. But I am very pleased if anyone can benefit from my story. Hurdles in life make us tougher and that is good. But if the hurdles I overcome can help others as well is better yet.

i am so sorry for your loss you are the only person understands your pain by bobby6

Hi<br />
<br />
I just wanted to say well done and I found your story inspiring, it seems to me you just seem in the long term to move on to better and better things....I like the way you something happened and 'I Knew.....' because you dont seem to attach dread to that and the next thing is even better. Seems to me something really great and big is coming your way and I for one am envious! :-). All the best Daisy xx

Hi mark247<br />
Despite all you've been through you are a star. You have inspired many by your actions and how you deal with issues. I feel you. All the best.

To all - I want to thank you so much for all your comments. You are all such good people. Im knew here on EP and didn't really expect this much response but I appreciate it. That is one thing that makes it possible for me to go on with a positive attitude is that there are so many good people in this world. In closing I would like to pass on the "favorite quote" of a young Vietnamese girl named mai i met here on EP. She says..<br />
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"Life is too short to wake up in the morning with regrets. So love the people who treat you right, forget about the ones who don't and remember that everything happens for a reason. If you get a chance, take it. If this changes you life, let it. Nobody said that it would be easy, they just promised that it would be worth it"<br />
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These are words to live by. Don't you agree?

Laddlboy - Im sure you will understand I do not want to go into a lot of details about what happened the night I came home and found a strange car in my driveway. I can say that i did stay long enough to find out that yes she was cheating. I was crushed, in shock, numb. Luckily the guy ran out the back. Im not sure what I would have done.

Paddy1257 - sorry to hear you are going through bad patch in life. Hold your head up buddy and get through it!<br />
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jiggstrixie92 - Its funny that you say that I am strong. I do not consider myself strong. Sometimes i feel so weak. We all face obstacles in life and we each find a way to get through it. I am very happy if my story encourages others.

slowandsensuous - I had not choice but to patient and continue. Its not easy. Everyday I have to force myself to get up and continue life. After all this could be the day that meet someone that will change my life.

Wow what a story! You have been through a lot. Sounds like you have bounced back before, you can do it again. I am curious as to what happened that night you came home to find a strange car in the drive way. Did you drive off and contact her later knowing what had transpired, or did you ring the door bell?

Wow what a story! You have been through a lot. Sounds like you have bounced back before, you can do it again. I am curious as to what happened that night you came home to find a strange car in the drive way. Did you drive off and contact her later knowing what had transpired, or did you ring the door bell?

You are a strong person. To have your 1st dream, your 2nd dream, then your 3rd dream ruined, then to turn around and keep rolling is admirable. You are an example to follow. Thank you for sharing your story and your strength.

I'm going through a bad patch myself at the moment but nothing like this. Please accept my sympathies and admiration.

Dude! I really want to meet you, someday & learn to be patient!! <br />
Man, I so so so respect the strength in "Your Knees" to stand upto it, which most of us with solid ones don't have!!

Hey nkumra Ive never turned down a beer! lol

WTF? Really? Damn dude... I want to buy you a beer.

matt268uk - There are lots of us that have been through the mill. Sometimes more than once! Thank you so much for your comments. We just have to draw encouragement from each other and be ready when that next door opens!! Good luck on your fusion surgeries!

loffe9 - as my grandparents and parents used to tell me all the time perseverance always wins out in the end. Seems so simple but in fact it is very hard to do throughout your whole life.

maicua - I don't know why you say you are too young to post any comment on my story. This is certainly not true at all. Just as the young can learn from their elders the older generations can also learn and should try to draw encouragement through their youthful outlook on life. I appreciate your comment maicua and wish you the best of luck too.

owrelax - hey who said anything about finishing last? We just have to get up and finish the race.<br />
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norumi - Not sure what I could teach as I have made a lot of mistakes in my life but if there is anything I hope maybe some people draw encouragement from my life stories. THere is always a tomorrow.<br />
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bigsmile542 - I draw encouragement from people like you that choose to get stronger with whatever life throws at us. Thank you bigsmile.

Hi. I also have had many changes throughout my life. I think you adapt and re invent yourself each time. You begin to embrace change rather than fear it. When things go **** up you have 2 choices. Either sit and moan feeling real down, or say I didn't deserve that but OK, so what's next. It may seem cold or callous to some, but at least you remain sane.

horrible , but set her free

Hope you get over those things soon. I know I'm too young to post any comment on your story, but I just wanna say that I understand your feeling. First start with your basketball accident which stopped you from going to the NBA. This is even harder for a professional basketball pla<x>yer like you. Then your fiancé and now it is your ex-wife. Times will release your pains and brings you new happiness I think. <br />
Sure, there are a lot of members here on EP want to share with you both good and bad experiences. <br />
Wish you a long healthy and happy life!

We have much in common.... good girls finish last too........sometimes! But not alway stuck on that mode.

I am sorry for the setbacks in your life. It is very cruel and unfair.<br />
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What you have been through and you are not angry is an accomplishment. You should teach the rest of us this gift or skill that you possess. I am struggling with my life issues and anger brought on by betrayal.<br />
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Give it some thought as you move on. With your experience and attitude you can do a lot of good. All the best in your journey.

When it comes to others I understand fully. Life is full of ups and downs, I all so roll with the flow. But one thing I have learned as one door closes there will be another open sometimes two at the same time. I am 52 years old and have become a very strong person. Sometimes too strong. Enjoy the changes life brings and keep on rolling. Have a big smile to all.!!!!!!!

Thanks so much Kathy. I must say I was surprised to see anyone comment on my story. I appreciate your comments. I am brand new here to EP and as I read more and more stories i see so much potential to share, and to help each other in getting things off their chest. I guess thats why im here as it is so much easier to post a story online than it is to find a friend close enough to trust with your innermost feelings and worries.

Must be a big feeling of betrayal and questioning about the relationship you had. I'm sorry that you had to go through the loss, but at l can see that you wanted closure on something that caused you so much pain. I do hope that you can rebound again as in the past, and make the best of your situation. Wishing you a happy future. Kathy

Thanks Kathy. No i am sorry to say we are already divorced. As it turns out it was a lot more than her cheating. I found out that she had been stealing from me as well. She was taking money out of our joint account without me knowing about it. More than $75 thousand was missing. But because i trusted her and it was a joint account it really wasn't stealing. Then in the divorce because I did not have a prenup (never thought i would need one) she ended up with our house and half my business holdings. Guess i had a bad lawyer but mostly i just wanted everything behind me.

You are strong, and have made the best of what has been handed to you throughout your life. I hope you can find the strength to try to put this behind you. If you decide to forgive and make your marriage work, or if you decide you must move on, I hope that you will keep your close your heart to love. hugs Kathy