I Hate Myself

My name is Jessica and I'm 13 years old. I am 5'9". I feel like I am a giant. My legs and arms are long, my feet are size 11, and my fingers and hands are big and long. I hate my body. I hate my face. I hate my long nose. I hate how I sweat too much. I hate how I'm chubby. My mom doesn't like me weighing myself after my anorexia. I sneaked it though and I'm127. Thats almost an extra 30 pounds than other girls my age. I know that's a healthy weight but I sincerely hate it more than words can describe. I've tried suicide before. People automatically judge me because I'm not the prettiest, preppiest, or most "normal" looking girl. I've never been asked out accept for once buy a friend. I feel like I'm not good enough for people, and I annoy the **** out of everyone I meet. My sister accuses me of being an attention seeker. I don't do this for the attention. These are my serious feelings. I hate myself.
WhyNotGiveUp WhyNotGiveUp
22-25, F
6 Responses Jul 17, 2010

Hey sweetie.... i had the same problem when i was your age. I eventually topped out at 6'1".... took some time but i eventually grew into my body. I know its tough sweetie but hang in there. Trust me as you get older ur height will be a good thing. Huggggggsssssss

i feel the same way you feel im 12 and im 5`5 i kno thts not that tall compared to really tall girls but my feeling about my hieght are just the same ive gone on many websites that have support groups for tall girls and it really helps remember BEING TALL IS A BEAUTIFUL THING YOU JUST HAVE TO LEARN HOW TO EXCEPT IT IM WORKING ON IT AND ONE MORE THING I SAY THIS TO MYSELF EVERYDAY I AM WHI I AM KEEP THAT IN MIND

WOW I'm only 4'4" i guess i look up to you huh and i'm older then you sheesh lol

I'm in your situation. I am also 13 and actually 5'9-5'10, somewhere in between. I completely understand. Just know that things will get better. I promise. I used to be in depression about this, but you'll soon find yourself to be beautiful. it may not seem like it now, and you might think "yeah, right" but believe it. youre most likely done growing, and i cant tell you how many guys there are out there that are 6'0+. It will all be fine, your whole life is ahead of you :)

I'm a guy and I understand how you feel. But don't worry about your appearance, just be proud of who you are.<br />
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Also, I'm going to share something with you. I have read interviews with a number of models and it is very common for them to be tall and thin when they are younger and then grow out when they are older. There was one model in particular who mentioned having similiar issues to you when she was younger, she couldn't get a guy if her life depended on it. But then, later, as she got older, her body filled out and she could basically pick and choose who she wanted, she could have anyone she wanted.<br />
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I hope that makes you feel better.

Wow i'm 4'4 and i wear a size 5 shoe i could put both my feet in 1 of your shoes i think i'm a guy my name is Bob i guess i be a bit short to you huh

Don't. It's a simple solution. You have to get the point where you don't care what anyone else thinks. Sure, you might always have insecurities and feelings of doubt about yourself. But suck it up. My sister is a 120lb cheerleader with a six pack. I'm a 150lb nothing with a talent for writing and procrastination. I don't care what I look like because I feel confident enough in my soul. I have a beaming personality and a crazy look in my eye that makes people smile with me.<br />
I used to be a bit like you. I hated almost every aspect of myself. But then I met a girl who was confident. She openly told us to ignore the wafting scent of her unwashed hair because she'd spent the day at the gym and didn't have the energy to run home. She was completely sure of herself and I decided I wanted to have the same confidence in myself.<br />
It's a decision you make, and it's resisting the urge to criticize yourself.<br />
Good luck.