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Pregnant At Sixteen.

Teenage girls that get pregnant might as well walk around branded as a who re, immature, irresponsible, and incapable of being as good of a Mother as adult women. I know not all people think this way- but the vast majority look at us, and see something that they, and society, are ashamed of.

Then there are the rest of us. We are the ones that think of the possibilities, and because of that, are open-minded and accepting.  A person that judges someone over a situation like this, that they know nothing about, shows something about their own character. 

Last year I was forced into having sex with someone I thought was a friend of mine. After it happened, I went on pretending like it never did- until I couldn't pretend any longer. One day I noticed that I'd missed my period. I thought that it was probably just stress, I'd missed my period many times before because of it. But a couple weeks later, I still hadn't had my period, so I asked my friend to get me a test, and it was positive. I was completely shocked. I have always been pretty innocent, even shy. I couldn't comprehend that something that I'd never even thought about could happen to me. 

I was going to get an abortion, but luckily, when I went to get it done, I'd been too late. I had a hard time telling my dad, I knew that he'd be upset, and I didn't want him to think of me as someone besides his little girl. I thought he'd go nuts, but I was surprised. He helped me out a lot, and told me that there was no point in getting upset over something that couldn't be changed.

The first three months of pregnancy was nothing but morning sickness, all the time. Anything that I smelled made me throw up, anything that I ate made me throw up, and even the thought of certain foods made me throw up. After those months, I thought anything else would be much easier- and it really was, until the last month. The last month of pregnancy is the worst. You are waiting in anticipation for your baby to come, you can't bend over, Braxton Hix Contractions have you hurting, and your body is pretty sore. There are a lot of weird feelings/things going on in your body in the last month.

The day that my water broke was July 19, 2008. I had to be induced with Pitocin, which didn't work as well as they hoped-12 hours later I was only about 7 cm dilated, wasn't getting any farther along, and I was hypertensive. I ended up having to have a c-section, and out came the most gorgeous little girl.

Since having her, I have had little obstacles I've worked through, but I couldn't have asked for anything better than her. Yes, I am 16, but being 16 doesn't mean that I can't be a good Mother, and it doesn't mean that I can't Love her all the same. My heart grew bigger when she was born. I know what people see when they see me with her, and to tell you the truth, I just don't care. They can stare all they want, because I know what I've gone through, and how well I am doing. I am a single mom, and I do everything I need to do for my baby. I believe if I can do it, anyone can.

 

My baby girl is now 6 weeks and 3 days old. She's so beautiful, and she's learning very fast! I am so proud of her.

If you are a teenage girl and you are pregnant, it isn't the end of the world. They may tell you that your life is over, but it really isn't. I am going back to school for my Senior year, and I am planning on going to school to become a police officer. You're completely capable of getting through pregnancy, and you are completely capable of loving and taking care of a baby. Don't listen to what people say, they don't know you, or what you're going through. They don't know exactly how strong you really are.

If any girl is reading this and wants to know anything, or needs any help or advice, I'm always here. The best thing during pregnancy is knowing someone is there for you. You always need at least one person to turn to.

 

<3 Karley.

Karley Karley 16-17, F 45 Responses Sep 1, 2008

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Thank you for sharing your beautiful story

how are you?...wanna chat on yahoo sometime? daytimepm69 is mine

i loved your story. would like to talk sometime if possible.

Your a tough woman. I wish you the best.

I would like to point out a logical fallacy in your post that's always been a pet peeve of mine. Judging others does not actually indicate anything about the one doing the judging. We make judgement about others all the time on limited information. It is necessary because we interact with so many people throughout an average day that we couldn't possibly take the time to know them all properly. Indeed, in many cases these judgement calls seem natural to us, to the point where anyone bringing them up as examples appear to be daft. If a man came up to you with a large bloody knife in his hand, you'd feel scared and run away. This in and of itself is a judgement call- a completely natural and appropriate one, but a judgement call all the same.

The same thing happens to me when i go out with my 1 year old daughter but like you said I really dont care as long as I have her and my family thats all I need.

Well said:)

This is beautiful. <3

Know what I see when I see a teen mom? I see something that, but for the grace of God and some good luck, could very well have been me. (I knew what could happen, and I was careful, but condoms aren't always reliable and they certainly aren't foolproof.) Sounds like you have a great dad and a great relationship with him. YOU'RE the lucky one. Cherish your baby girl and know that in the end it will truly all be worth it. Best of luck :) to you.

I salute u.. Becoz where i live is a place where women are treated as servent.. I feel vey sorry for them.. May god help u in very way he can.. Best of luck

My sister got pregnant at 17. She's 41 now, the baby has grown to become a good 22 year old man. My sister is married (not to her first child's father) to a good guy and she has 2 more kids by him. It's possible to still make it and have a good life.
Having a child is a HUGE responsibility, and until we accept that teenagers have sex (they are not little kids after all) and teach them safe sex practices and provide them with free contraception teen pregnancy is going to be a problem.
I wouldn't want my child to be hurt. If she wants to have sex, then she's going to do it no matter how I feel about it. It's my responsibility to make sure she's safe.

Exactly. We need to arm children with facts and not obscurity (like 'abstinence is the only option' - WTF was that about, anyway?).

I'm so sorry that someone took advantage of you, but the result sounds wonderful (that sounds awful, but you know what I mean). I'm so glad things have turned out well for you, and I wish you well.

Hi Karley, I agree with you that many look at us, and see something that they, and society, are ashamed of. The sad part is that me being 26 with an 8 year old and a 4 year old, I still get dirty looks and shunned by random people in the street. It can be ruff out there. the thing that makes be feel better is proving them wrong. Your right it isn't the end of the world and they may tell you that your life is over, its just the start of a new life and a new direction. you can do any thing you put your mind to. Don't "ever" let people discourage you!!! keep hope alive and you'll make it.~Renee

That sucks! When my mom was 21, she had two kids and back then no one gave her a second look. What a bunch of judgmental bumholes we've become...

im doing a research project on the socio-emotional needs of a teen pregnancy for school, would anyone please volunteer to help me in doing an interview?

I was 14 when I had my son now I am 16 a straight a student top of of classes I have a job and bought my own car.. let pwople think whater the hell they want age has nothing to do with it I mean think of it this way when u hear about parents having there kids takin away about 90 % of them are 27 or older. Ur young and there pissed that when there kids are 15 there going to be to old and lazy to want to do anything. Forget other people and love ur child like nothing else matters

Hey guys...<br />
I am not part of this website, but I am 17 and a few weeks pregnant. I am scared as hell, and considered abortion (my boyfriend's idea) but I don't want to regret it for the rest of my life. But I don't know if I can raise a child. My family is very religious, and I would be thrown out of my house. i would have nowhere to go. I'd lose my family, and my friends. I don't know if I am strong enough.

If ur bf wants u to get an abortion that's a problem kids are a blessing I had my son at 14 I was scared and I was worried how I would handle it or how I would feel to be a mom now I'm glad I had sex and got knocked up my son made me who I am today. There are people who can't have kids don't just give yours up

Dont abort it. Im 17 too and I cant imagine having a baby as I am a baby in my mothers eyes.She still cooks for me,helps me. I cant say I know what its like but,my girl,youve made a desicion and Im sorry to say it was your own and now you have to be unselfish and take responsibility for your actions. That baby is innocent and will grow up(if God doesnt take him soon) to be a real person just like you. Who are YOU to kill it? This was posted a while ago. so i dont know if youve told ur parents.

All I can say is PLEASE be sure to continue your education and be a good role model for your daughter.

Well just take comfort in this. 1) she has a warm loving close relationship with her father. For many children born to teen parents their greatest tragedy is that they are forced to abide distraced, over worked teen parents who dont' have enough time spend with theml Your daughter has been spared that horror. 2)Given that you were raped you took the amazing smart and courtageous step of reporting your attacker thusly sparing other young women the horror of being raped. If you had failed to do that not only would failing your dauther miserable you would be as guilty as the rapist in any subsequent rapes! You wouldn't just be a complete and total failure as mother you would be a failure as a human being, a child who helps men get away with rape. <br />
<br />
Be so grateful neither of these facts are true!

Hi. I was 18 when I had my first. It was hard. VERY HARD!! Actually that is the understatement of the century. I had no family support. And one bad decision snowballed into many more just trying to get out of the first bad choice that I made because of inexperience. My advice is to make some goals (like becoming a police officer~good choice) and stay out of a relationship for awhile. Because <br />
when you're lonely that's when you<br />
make bad choices because you feel <br />
more willing to compromise <br />
yourself. I speak from 100% <br />
experience. I had 4 kids by the time<br />
I was 24. I would say to find a support system. Call around maybe to some women's shelters they might know of a teen mom support group. A lot of support can be found if you call 211. Make a plan for your life and stick to it even when you aren't sure how exactly by keeping in mind what you want as your end result. Make all of your decisions with the end result in mind and you'll be okay. That's the advice I wish I could go back in time to tell myself when I first got pregnant when I was 17. So that's my advice to all the girls who feel scared and all alone. It is scary and it is lonely until you find a good support network and start working towards making your dreams reality. Good luck.

Touching story! I know what you mean about wanting to get an abortion, but not being able to because it being to late. I am 15 with a baby boy named Aiden, he wasn't planned but he is my life now, since I was raped, and I love him with all my heart, and having the suport of my mom, helps alot with being a teenage mom.

i felt the same as you even though pregnancy was not on purpose but i wasnt forced into having sex i was judged a lot by people who didnt even know me after i gave birth to my son i was walking throught the ward and some woman was talking to a nurse and they were talking about how i was unable to take care of my son but i have proven evrey single person who judged me wrong my son is now 9 weeks and 4 days he is growing so fast and has learned so much allready all my friends stayed with me during the pregnancy and they all supported me my family helped me so much also but i would have never been able to get any where with out my fiancé he is my life

wow! i love it! I'm 18 and i really want a baby (not that i plan on having one any time soon, but i can dream :D) Teenaged mothers can be AMAZING mothers, I'm so happy for you and your little girl! I hope that you both have an amazing life and congratz.

is it hard being a single mom like do you ever get lonely and wish that you could have someone there to help you with your daughter? i'm asking because i'm feeling kind of scared about being a single mom and i'm wondering how difficult it's going to be, i mean i know its going to be hard but i want to know like feel confident that i can do this on my own. because with my baby's dad things are really bad and to be honest i would rather do this on my own than be with him, he makes me feel like i'm worthless to him and he doesn't even try and talk to me not even about me being pregnant, i talk to his sister more than i talk to him and it just seems like he's not going to come around at all:/

I was pregnant at 16 and had my baby a week before i turned 17. I lost all my so called friends. I feel alone sometimes. But i am very lucky i found a man who is willing to take of my daughter as his own. He was there since litterally the day she was born even tho we were dating a month before she was born. He moved from another state just to be with me

Hun i am 21 years old with a 1 year old, i've been thru hell and reading ur story has touched me soo much:)

i am 17 and also pregnant. I wasnt expecting to get pregnant at this age but so far i am happy even though i am not ready to be a mom. I have support from my boyfriend and his family but still scared to tell my own but i am working on it. Reading this and alot of other peoples opinions helps me out be not so scared to tell my parents. And i think that even though i feel i am not ready to be a mom once that baby is born i know i will love that child more than anything.

Three years later. How are you doing with your darling baby girl? She is walking talking a blue streak and keeping you running like crazy. Starting JK this September? I hope that you are still as happy as you were 3 years ago. I am wishing you all the best in your life. You both deserve it.

I am really impressed with you. Your story sounds a lot like mine at your age in so many ways. I had my son when I was 15 and today is 16. I have an BBA, MBA, great career and a beautiful home. Our journey has not been easy, but we are making it. His teen years are the hardest for both of us, but we'll make it through this too! I share my story in my book that has really helped a lot of teen mothers and girls that I'm trying to prevent from becoming teen mothers. Please check it out because I see a lot of me in you :). www.lifeafterbirthbook.com

i completely disagree with people who say teen mums are irresponsible and immature, i am a teen mum myself, i have a ten month old little boy and i am only 17, my boy was 3 months premature and its going great.<br />
me and my partner are so happy to have our little boy and though i may only be 17 i am very mature when it come to my son, when you have a child it changes you alot and your whole value of life and way of doing things change and you do have to give up so much, i used to go out clubbing most nights and not come home till early hours of the morning but i am a changed teen now as my son always comes first and i have grown up alot.<br />
my little boy is the best things that has ever happened to me and i want to give him everything i never had.

i completely disagree with people who say teen mums are irresponsible and immature, i am a teen mum myself, i have a ten month old little boy and i am only 17, my boy was 3 months premature and its going great.<br />
me and my partner are so happy to have our little boy and though i may only be 17 i am very mature when it come to my son, when you have a child it changes you alot and your whole value of life and way of doing things change and you do have to give up so much, i used to go out clubbing most nights and not come home till early hours of the morning but i am a changed teen now as my son always comes first and i have grown up alot.<br />
my little boy is the best things that has ever happened to me and i want to give him everything i never had.

You cant say this because iam a mother of a 6month old and she's the best thing that happened to me