16 Year Old Maltese Gay Male Pagan

Well, I'd usually start one of these things by telling you my name, but one of this site's main qualities (which attracted me to it) is anonymity, so I'll go by my username...


I'm tito24, I'm a 16 year old gay guy (though I am NOT effeminate, at all, if any of you believe the stereotypes). I am making my way back to Pagan after 3 years...


I had first started Witchcraft in the summer of 2004, I was about to turn 13 (yeah I know, like I would be able to take a religion seriously at 13 :S ) and started looking around online, I had always been a fan of fantasy movies, shows and books, loving the thought of being able to a bit of hocus pocus myself... As you can see I was very obviously disillusioned.


Well, at the time I was swept away by the concept of Witchcraft and WIcca, and JUST as I had been grasping the seriousness of the religion (moving forward to Summer 2005 now) when my Christian (and also bipolar and physically abusive) dad destroyed ALL of my books and supplies (well to be fair, at that age I was going through a revenge phase where I used to steal money from him every week).


Well, after the year of rituals being held in my room left right and center and pretty much ignoring any ethics or REAL lessons of the craft, I immersed myself in 3 years of strict atheism, ignoring all the prophetic dreams (technical term, nothing extraordinary about them, just simple stuff like conversations or movie scenes) and my never failing gut instincts. I then became extremely depressed and for around 6 months became addicted to self injury, transitioned from having compulsive-eating disorder to starving, purging and uncontrollably bingeing.


Now, at 16, I'm FINALLY sorting out my life, am becoming more grounded and stable, my parents have split up and I'm away from an abusive environment and I've decided to try and explore my spirituality again. This time, however, I talked things through with my mum and she supports my decision as long as I don't end up the same way I did a few years ago, I plan to look at Eclectic WIcca/Witchcraft (am still a bit confused about which term fits me more) as a religion and a spiritual awakening, instead of using Magic as a way to cut corners and feel "special"


Am older and more mature, and things are going well for me right now, so I hope that my new Pagan life helps me "repair" myself...


Anyway, not sure if this is too much info or anything, but that's my story, and I'm more than happy to hear others' stories too =)

tito24 tito24
18-21, M
22 Responses Mar 19, 2008

I also self harm, am 16 too and sorting stuff out, this site is so good for people like us, hope this helps you! your not alone and Blessed Be! :)

Praying for you...

If you're Maltese & in Malta, you might make a point of going to the Pagan Religious Sites that are on the Islands. You might have a religious experience or vision. I did, many years ago when I visited the islands. People there never stopped worshipping the Earth Mother, they just call Her Mary, Mother of Jesus not.

Well my life is kind of the begging of yours I'm just thirteen now, lets hope by the time I'm 16 I straighten things out like you :) Blessed Be.

good luck hun, paganism really helped me, i was even able to get off of my medications for sever anxiety because i was able to relax myself more. good luck walking your path and remember that we all walk it with you . Blessed Be

Very powerful! I found myself emphasizing with you a lot. I'd just like to say best of luck to you and may the God and Goddess light your path!<br />
Blessed be!!!

nice story!<br />
im also 16 and male..<br />
im also sorting out my life now<br />
i would like to be friends..

its a nice story!<br />
im also 16 years old now and like you i want to sort out my life..<br />
and im a male..<br />
im glad you made it, if you can i can!<br />
<br />
i want to be friends with you..<br />
blessed be

I am glad you have everything straightened out now. Would you like to be friends on here?

What a trial, im sorry for that.<br />
ever thought about reading the bible? *GASP*<br />
no word of a lie. it took me a while to understand what it meant and it;s meanings. <br />
should read it once in a while ;p<br />
& i hope your life turns around for the better brother! :)<br />
Bless you friend

You've been having quite the life so far, huh? Sadness about that part, But you sound like you have the makings of a great Wiccan/Pagan, not all teen's (maybe even myself) really grasp at how deep this religion goes. Good luck to you and with your studies! I hope you find the spirituality your looking for.<br />
Oh, and on Wicca vs. Witchcraft- Wicca is a religion (gods/goddesses, the rede, law of three) And witchcraft is more just the spell/ritual aspects found in wicca without the dedications and true 'religious' part of it. Hope that helps!

Was it hard to give up the self injury? you dont have to answer. I just. I'm a pain addict I guess you could say and I don't know if I want to quit but people keep telling me I have to and I dont know what Im doing anbymore. Yeah too much info about myself but. Youre probably wondering why I keep ending sentences in the middle of something. that's because I don't know how to finish the sentence and im contemplating deleting this anyways.

I can feel your reason for turning to the pagan religion i. Understand how it seems to have a sort of calming sense. It also allows for a new world so to speak a world with no more lies and hurt

Nice story dude. I'm glad to read a story like yours. It similar to mine in some sense.......I would like to be friends with you<br />
<br />
<br />

from Shawn Robbins, Psychic, and author of WICCAPEDIA.<br />
<br />
There was something about your story I found very compelling, even more interesting, I picked up you have a natural writing talent, as well as being artiistic. It is just a gut feeling of mine, however, I believe you have a natural talent for writing, including sc<x>ript writing. Truly, I would consider this, and see if you can look into working in the arts.<br />
<br />
Cheers, Shawn

This was a great thing to read as the first story that I do read on this site.<br />
I hope all goes well for you <br />
Blessed Be <3

Good for you! I love hearing success stories with faith. I think faith is only real when it transforms you and it sounds like it has. In fact, I believe that is why we are here. I am a Christian that studies Kabbalah and the tenants of Illuminism and the more I study about different perspectives on spirituality, the more I come to realize that everyone has a spiritual path and simply looking for it will guide you too it.<br />
<br />
Good luck

o hai thur :3<br />
I'm glad that you are getting your life sorted out!<br />
Trust me, life always gets better<br />
*is about to say a famous quote*<br />
It's always darkest before the light.<br />
I may have said that wrong but you get the point :)<br />
If you wanna be friends, just message me.<br />
Blessed be :D

Best of luck to you. :) <br />
<br />
I'm also a Gay Pagan. (And no, I'm not a stereotype either. I'm not a manly dyke with super-short hair who constantly hits on women or ******* about how evil men are.) I'm very happy that your mother supports you. I'm still "trapped in the broom closet" at the moment, so I'm pretty much on my own.<br />
<br />
I'm so happy that your life has been sorted out. Keep it up and I hope you find the answers you're looking for.<br />
<br />
~Blessed Be

I really enjoyed reading your story man. I went through something similar to what you did when you stopped being a pagan when I was trying to force myself to be a christian and abandon my Wiccan beliefs. I had gone through a long period of depression and had gotten into the habit of hurting myself and hurting others around me by hurting myself. I'm glad you made it through the hard times in your life so far and I enjoyed reading about someone who went through someth9ing similar to what i did. If you ever want to talk, just message me.<br />
Bless be<br />
<br />

im looking for a white 15-16 year old male who just wants to have sex

nice story would love to be friends msg me if youd like<br />