My Story With Depression

I started getting these feelings of sadness when i was about 10, but i thought everyone got it, after a couple years i started feeling guilty all the time, and that i wasn't mean to be here, but i knew i was because god put me on this earth for a reason but it was hard for me to believe it, it wasn't till last year i started getting the feelings more and it wasn't till last year i had cut myself for the first time, i don't get bullied, but everything people say at school to me hurts, they say I'm flat and they say i have a moustache and they say I'm short, all these things are try but there all my flaws and everyone keeps pointing them out, my parents argue sometimes but they say its a good thing because if people who are married don't tell each other there feelings then its not a good relationship, but it still bugs me because i don't want to be one of those kids who have split up parents. My parents yell at me a lot an fit started this year when i turned 14, they always yell at me for stupid things but those things bug me i just feel like crying about it, everyone starts to annoy me now, and i just want to sleep and never wake up, i haven't been diagnosed with depression because I'm scared to tell my parents how i feel, but i really want to see a therapist, i want to know if I'm actually depressed, I've token tests online and they all say i am, i just don't want my parents finding out, this year i did feel good for a little bit because of this guy i really liked he told me i was beautiful and that he loved me, and then he finally asked me out I was like sososoos happpppy! but then he dumped me 2 days after, and i found out he only said those things and dated me for a dare, after that i havent' been able to trust nobody at all, i can't even trust my best friends anymore, i hate this feeling but I'm scared it will never ever go away! if there is anyone who can help me with telling my parents, can u please tell me how! please.
whyisitalwaysme whyisitalwaysme
13-15, F
2 Responses May 1, 2012

thank you :) but i just don't know the words to say to them, or how to get the conversation starting

Ive been diagnosed with depression for a year now. Telling your parents is hard, but if you truly think that you are depressed, anti-depressant medication is helpful but it can cause sideeffects and cost money. they can become addicting and find yourself needing them everyday. not all medications are like that. cutting isnt a good way to release sadness, talking with someone is. sometimes things get worse before they get better, praying for you!