I'm Tired Of Living.

I've been battling depression for about 3 years but I was only recently diagnosed with chronic depression. I'm on antidepressants but they aren't helping. My depression just keeps getting worse and worse. I haven't been to school for like 2 weeks. I have no motivation to do anything. All I ever do anymore is lay in my bed and cry. Last night it got really bad for some reason and I ended up cutting myself and lost so much blood I passed out. I just want to end the pain and suffering. I can't deal with feeling like this anymore. I'm worthless. Suicide is a constant thought in my mind... slitting my wrists... overdosing on pills... suffocating myself.. It's so easy. I'm only 15 and I know I have much more to my life. But if I have to deal with this my whole life I don't want to live. I also have really bad social anxiety so I can't really talk to anyone about this with out having an anxiety attack. I lock myself in my room and just blast music into my ears. I have nothing left to live for. My parents think I'm broken and worthless. My friends don't even care enough to check up on me. I have no motivation to do anything. My body is shutting down. My mind is shutting down. I'm giving up.
Nirtokitkat Nirtokitkat
13-15, F
1 Response Dec 12, 2012

Hi :) . i am going through the same thing.... i know it will get better but as long as i don't see it happening now i don't believe it. i have no more words to say, i talked to much but no one listens. and when i don't talk still no one listens. i miss the old me... but i know that someday it will get better. JUST KNOW THAT