Shes Here To Staywell its been around 3 mouths and apart from when i'm in public or around family, and the odd day it seem that i'm Jessica pritty much full time. aspecialy when i'm alone and just allwoed to be alone with myself.
worryingly i have started to dislike my body (i've never disliked it before, i wasn't happy with it, but i've never disliked it) but before you start to worry i'm not cutting myself or hurting myself. i just hate what stears back at me in the mirror now more then ever.
i'm starting to become more and more convinst i should be a Girl, i should be Jessica and not be forecd to hide away, i should be Jessica, tall, pritty, long red hair, the perfect hour glass figure and no biger the C-cups. I've read a so called "profecinals" opioin on transisoning and everthing he/she said was very discurascing, talking about how your life will change in a big way, you'll be left with nothing and verythig you loved will be gone, including family and friends, it will be much harder to get jobs and find friends etc........ personaly i dont beleve what this "profecinal" said.
i beleve if i were to transion and become Jessica, that my life would'nt change that drasticly. i know my mum and dad would sapport me, i have some very very close friends, how know of my wanting to be a girl and they are ook with that. i dont have a job (Yet i'm still looking) and being only 18 the effects of the hormons would take good effect on me.
but i'm still unsure were this is what i want or not. i'm still contemplating things and in need of help. to decide
when i see myself as Jessica i'm happy, more happy then i've been in years. but i allso see my life not unchanged but changed in some ways. my hobbies, humer, music, opions, personality etc would be unchanged. and my life would contuine "simaler" to before.
i know i haven't said everything i wanted to but i'll be happy to answer any questions you may have. not that many people will care, but if you are reading this, pleaces leave feed back and thank you.