Over Used And Under AppreciatedHey guys,
So I'm Sam, and I guess I'm pretty new to this whole sharing my story thing. Where do I begin?
Well, my first female crush was in Grade 5 on a girl named Zodiac. She was my first kiss too. Although, I never really thought much of it until I got a little older and I started to REALLY notice girls.
When I turned 12 i'd realised for myself that I was a lesbian. But I didn't 'out it' until about 6 months ago (I'm 15). I had to come out I guess, I mean, i'd just started dating this amazing alternative girl Hannah. We'd been best friends for a while and she kind of knew I was into girls so yeah. It didn't last all that long, but that was because of some very personal reasons on her part and some unwanted feelings towards her ex.
Before Hannah there was Anna. She is so beautiful. She was my first valentine. But she went off and had sex with Jason and completely broke my heart.
But then there was Emily. I met her at a party. I'd just been on the phone to a girl named Cassey, who lives really far away, but I really liked her. Cassey was drunk and at a party and I was drunk. I told her I had strong feelings for her and she said she can't deal with distance due to anxiety and an obsession with cuddling and sex (she's 19 don't stress!). So anyway, this phone call left me quite emotional and I because messy, emotional drunk. This is where Emily came in. She saw me upset and started talking to me and got me happier as the night went on. Time came that I had to go home and I said goodbye and before I knew it she pulled me in and kissed me. Then after a 40 minute make out sesh in the car ride home she gave me her number and we proceeded to text for about a month. She said she wasn't into girls, but I was different and blah blah blah. Long story short, I really fell for her. We had sex. She took my girlginity (girl virginity) and then texted me saying none of it feels right and she didn't want to see me again. That really tore into me. She used me for sex to figure out her own feeliings and I was left to pick up the peices.
I should probably stop sooking to you all now. Anyways, I've been through a lot being a teenage lesbian. Bullying. Relationships. Heart ache. Bias. Unaccepting friends/family. You name it.
If anyone that has actually read this ever needs to talk about anything, just send me a message and I will try to help anyway I can
Love, Peace and Chicken Grease.
SamIsGay 18-21, F 2 Dec 19, 2012