i feel so lonely. I have no one who's really there for me. I self harm and my parents have recently found out, they have also found out that i was sexually abused when i was nine. I cry myself to sleep most nights and i hate my appearance. I hate everything about me. I have to fake a smile everyday of my life and i dont know much longer i can continue. Sometimes i just want to die. 
ChloeHannah ChloeHannah
13-15, F
4 Responses Nov 23, 2011

I feel exactly the same, but I have been struggling to not start cutting, but I often find myself, going through drawers looking for razors...

Hey... I know exactly what you're going through. I self harm, well used too anyway, and it never did me any good. To keep me happy, i sit on the roof, and stare up. It lets all my thoughts out. I don't suggest this to anyone with thoughts of suicide, or someone with a really big house, but it usually helps me. Message me if you ever feel down coz i'm here for you kiddo :)<br />

i"m the person who started this group because i felt the same way you did. i knew there were other teenagers out there who felt alone and like they were never going to escape this depression. its like carrying a weight on your back. the longer you have it the worse it hurts and eventually you just give up and stop trying. <br />
my advice to you is to have a journal. i have one and its helped me get my anger, sadness, and all the other emotions out because i have a really difficult time opening up to people and i keep everything bottled in and that journal was the only thing that let me express myself. <br />
another thing, STAY ON THIS SITE you will meet some of the nicest most supportive people on this site. just know i created this group for a reason and i'm happy you shared this, i'm here if you need someone to talk to :) hang in there kiddo!

thank you :)

Chloe believe it or not soooo many people feel the same way you do but are not brave enough to tell anyone, they just go on faking the smiles, or pick on someone, or bully people. You have found this web site and I do understand how you feel. I am so sad and lonely too. I am much older then you so I know those feeling for you will sometimes be really really bad but other days not so bad. When you feel a tiny bit happy go and do something for yourself that will make you happy, like maybe look around Walmart at new shirts or go to chapters and look through some books with puppies. You get the idea? Maybe you can talk to someone on here close to your age that goes through the same feelings as you. You may not think so but there are people who love you very much and want you to be here. Don't hurt yourself anymore there are other outlets for those feelings. Maybe write a journal or I have read some people put an elastic band on their wrist and snap it. It hurts but will not leave a scar or you will not get an infection. Just make sure it's not too tight to cut off your circulation okay?<br />
Keep up with writing on here and keep trying to connect with others. You will feel a bit better knowing that someone is listening and understand your sadness. You try and have a good day and tell yourself that you can do it. I will try to check in to see how you are feeling :)