People In Your Life Can Shape Your Future

I am learning psychotherapy and have trained as a hypnotherapist, all this because of the pain I have felt in my early life with my partner of 20 years, she had Anorexia and still has Anxiety driven problems.

I wanted to help others who like my self found them selves isolated and trying to cope in situations that can seem hopeless, its not just the person with the psychological problem that feels the pain, but also those close to them.

Unfortunately it is often over looked that the family and friends of those suffering from life's problems also need support and help. I found that in the end I was just trying to hold on to my own health and survive the unfolding helplessness in all this.

I tried to help her but I did not understand what was going on at that time, I was also feeling neglected and alone, no one seemed to understand what I was going through, she would not seek help,  I went to her Doctor out of desperation . Her Doctor was unable to offer any help until she asked for the help her self, so I was trapped, seeing her lose wight and having to deal with all the mood swings and constant anger left me exhorsted and in need of help my self, in the end I could not take the pain any more, the realization that she was unable to cope with life and was looking towards ending it became to much, just seeing your loved one degenerate into a lifeless skeleton was painful in the extreme and also hurtfully frustrating, so I made a choice, I told her that if she did not get help I would leave her, I felt selfish and sick with worry that I was failing her. Thankfully she chose life over death, I also had to live with the fact that when we did see a psychiatrist I had agree to her being place into a psychiatric hospital and that hurt, to see the person you love beg you to take her home was, and still is painful to me, thankfully she did get the help she needed, but I did not, I felt abandoned, my own pain seemed unimportant and that hurt, I had unresolved anger for years eating me up, and this lead onto guilt at feeling angry at her.

But now I have resolved many issues in my life by learning about my self, Learning psychotherapy is learning about your self and yes it can be very painful, but also extremely rewarding and life changing

So here I am embarking on my new life of learning AND HOPEFULY HELPING

Ade Ade
46-50, M
4 Responses Jun 22, 2007

Another update you can see my forums at

Just an up date been fully trained for a while now :)

Thanks for you kind comment and I hope your finding your own way to cope and move forward in life.<br />
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I now run a website called and am finding my new work very rewarding.<br />
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I wish you all the very best

your story struck a chord with me, as i was in a similar situation with my last partner who was depressed and an alcoholic. I admire your strength so much for staying with your partner, and supporting them-that takes a lot. I'm glad that your partner got some help and wish you all the best with your training.