New To This

Hello all,
I am glad to find this little community of others to share experiences with. I am the mom of five children. My husband has been looking for a job for a longtime now and decided to try a career as a truck driver. He has only just started his training. Before he was hired for this job, I worked fulltime to support our family and now I will be switching to only occasional work, so that I can be home with our children. This all sounds great, right? I mean he's wanted work, and I've longed to be home with our children more. So, why am I feeling down and confused? First of all, I am NOT used to being away from my husband. We have no family here or even nearby, so he and the children are all I have and now he is gone. The fact that he only just started makes me feel lame and weak to feel so down about him being gone. Then, there's the fact that I love my kids with all my heart, but suddenly feeling essentially like a single mom of 5 has me feeling really overwhelmed. When my husband isn't doing anything for the job, I get angry if he is not calling me. I feel lost not really knowing what is going on, or what to expect.
Thanks for "listening" and any words of advice/encouragement are very welcome.
LoriAZ LoriAZ
36-40, F
4 Responses Jan 8, 2013

I don't have any advice as I am new to this too...new wife and new trucker's career...just wanna say you're not alone!!

Thank you very much.

Lori hang in there I am sorry for your plight but it will all be better in time.It is not easy dealing w/loneliness and I hope you make a lot of friends on so you have support for your night alone.Thanks for sharing.

Hi LoriAZ,
My husband isn't a trucker but he goes away for weeks at a time because of work. It started about a year or so ago and I am still not fully used to it. But having done this for a while now, I have started to realise that while we love each other a lot, we must have some sort of individual lives as well.

About six months ago I started picking up new hobbies like gardening. I've also started to do a bit of research on how to start an online business. While I miss him a lot when he is away and can barely sleep a wink the first few nights he is gone, I find some comfort in doing my own thing nowadays.

As for not calling, it's just your mind playing games on you. I felt the same way too and we had quite a number of big arguments over my paranoia or his lies, etc. The truth is that I simply don't know because I am not there and if he really wanted to do something behind my back while he is away, then I suppose there's nothing much I can do to stop him. This feeling that you have when your husband doesn't call can be paralysing and eventually will drive you insane.

After such a long marriage, I'm sure you know what your husband is and isn't capable of. I'm sure he loves you and your children very much and that's probably why he's taken on such a taxing job. I don't know if what I am writing will help you at all but just know that you are definitely not alone in your situation.

Take care.

Thank you so much for your comforting remarks. :)