New Girlfriend In Desperate Need Of Advice.

So my story is a lil different. My boyfriend and I have not been dating for long but this man has completely swept me off my feet. I do love him even though I haven't told him yet..lol. He is being deployed in January for approximately ten months. I don't know how I'm going to keep my sanity. Right now he's away at a base for training, I haven't seen him in 3 weeks. Our contact is very limited. It's so hard to sound strong upbeat and positive when all you want to do is jump through the phone and into his arms. I keep looking at our past text messages and any and all videos of him just so I can hear his voice, see his face. We've spoken about what'll happen when he's away...how the contact will be even more limited...how I might go a month or more without a word from him...I have no problem waiting for him. I just need advice as to how do you stop the missing him from interrupting your whole life. Just thinking about it makes my chest tight. Please any and all advice will help.
Cmr76 Cmr76
36-40, F
4 Responses Sep 18, 2012

I recently just ended a 6 month break between my boyfriend and I, and in less than a week we start another three month break. It's so hard to say goodbye, but it's is even harder to prevent yourself from obsessing over them when they are gone. I do the exact same things that you said. Look at our pictures, read past texts...all of it. It sounds cliche but really try to stay busy, and have a countdown on how many days left till you'll see him again, it really helps. Also, keep a journal. Even if not for every day, but for those days that you're completely overcome with missing him. Write down what you're feeling. Getting it out will help, and if you choose to share it with him he will be able to see just how much you love him. Whatever you do, though...don't talk to friends that aren't in a similar situation as you, all it will do is tick you off and upset you. I hope some of my advice helped. Best of luck to you!

Thanks I appreciate it. Your absolutely right btw...I am everything from naive, silly, delusional to just plain dumb for waiting for my airmen while he's deployed. My favorite question is "are you really going to wait?" Lol I'm glad I have you guys :)

It's funny...I'm usually always busy. I work full time and I train in Brazillian jiu jitsu 4x a week...and still go out with my friends. Since we've found out about his deployment we've made sure we spend as much time together as possible so I've cut back on everything else and now I'm really feeling it. Lol

I have found that getting out there and making new friends and doing things that will give you great stories to tell him when you do get the chance and making plans for when he does come home gives you something to look forward to rather than dwell on what he missed.... In may my bf and I are going to my ranch for some me and him time with hunting and kayaking and that's all I can think about but it's a goal to move on with everyday rather than wishing I could spend all day in bed thinking and worrying about him

Write him letters all the time. Like everyday! And keep yourself busy and surrounded by positive/supportive people. Also I find it helpful to set goals for myself to complete before I see my airman again. Like getting in shape or picking up a new hobby. I'm here to talk any time you need!

Thanks...I'm Carla btw. I really appreciate the advice.

You're welcome! :) I'm Kenzi