My Last Post.

Well my boyfriends coming home on Friday. He's getting medical seperation discharge, they found he has a blood disorder called g6pd, which means he's at risk for anemia so they've found him unfit to continue with basic training.

I realize I'm lucky for him coming home, but I know this is going to be tough to kind of go through with him. Although its not his fault, he feels like a complete failure and he's had this in mind for himself for years now, it was kind of how he defines himself. I'm starting to get nervous that he is going to change, and the stress of affording and going after a new career is going to really mess our relationship up. I'm willing to stick with him and be there through everything for him but I am afraid he won't feel the same.

When he left our relationship was so strong and we've been discussing marriage. It's going to really hurt me if that idea is just dropped, if the only reason he was so anxious to do it was because of benefits and not for just pure love. Afraid he's going to come to some crazy epiphany that he's better than me, or that we shouldn't be together.

Our relationships been about preparing for this for some time, and I'm really scared for when he comes back. Life's kind of thrown me for a loop in all this and I could use some advice.
hisafgf hisafgf
18-21, F
4 Responses Nov 26, 2012

Update: he finally got back today and things are amazing. It's crazy how much you cherish each other after only a month apart. It'll be so worth it for you all. May not have worked out for my man but he has so much ahead of him as well. :) So happy!

Wow. I am sorry... I hope he steps up to the plate and doesn't do what you're afraid of him doing. I'd say, just be encouraging with him. Let him know the military doesn't define him. You didn't fall in love with him because of the Air Force... you fell in love with him for him! And he can take who he is and apply that elsewhere. Sit down with him and discuss other jobs he may enjoy. Talk about what the future is going to be like. He'll be freaking out because his future just fell apart, but try to build a new one, don't let him dwell too much on the loss of this one. Figure out finances, jobs, where you'd live... The future is much more open for you two now!

I know it sounds like a devastating situation, and it is for him, but he'll get through it and hopefully you'll get through it together. I hope your fears don't become real. If they keep bothering you even weeks from now, perhaps you should confront him about them. It's better to be open than keep fears hidden.

Good luck with everything!

It may be long & hard but if you stand by him while he goes through this Im sure it will be okay, dont let this be your last post...regardless of if your bf is in or out of the af we're all here to help/support you.

I know this must hurt him, & yes, who knows whats to come now that this sudden change came to light but please support him everyway possible. I'm afraid too that he may seem distant or different but i would hope he doesnt completely change into a whole different person. If you two fell in love, then there is no reason why your true feelings for each other should fade. I know this is a tough call but please stay strong,for the both of you.
I'm here if you ever want to talk,so please keep in touch