What's Hard For Me...
Is not having my best friend around.
It just hit me that my best friend has been lost... temporarily I hope. I have a boyfriend still, but I have lost my best friend. He doesn't have time for my problems, to ask or hear about my day, to ask or hear about how I'm doing, how my family is doing, how school is doing. All he has time for is to ***** about how hard he has it, how much stress he's under, how much he has to study and how tired he is. I know that it's all true, he is sooo busy and I appreciate how stressed and tired he is, but I feel so alone... and even forgotten.
I miss having him to talk to about everything that goes on in my life, my daily activities, my thoughts, my concerns, my own stresses. And trust me, there's enough of those going on right now that I could probably write him a 16 page letter on each. I don't complain though, I keep my mouth shut and I encourage him in everything he does and says. But.. that is so draining. I'm the type of person that needs to express everything, every thought and feeling, I can't keep it bottled up and this is just not doing anything for me.
I don't want to put added stress on him because he has it coming from all directions (family, there, etc.) I just don't want to be another added thing to his list. I'm trying my hardest, and I write about it in his letters. I don't know what else to do.
I'm just a little bit broken and sad I think.